Love for the over 50's.

Today, I will leave the home that I have shared with my partner off and on for the last 18 months, and permanently for the last 6. Seems odd to start with the home but it was in an area that represented new opportunities to me. I will be moving back close to my old area, which whilst offering support is not ideal from the self perspective point of view, as I feel so ashamed and embarrassed at the failed relationship.

The reason we are separating is quite simple, my partner states that she just wants to live on her own. I am the only man she has lived with since her divorce over 10 years ago. Her daughter lived with her until a year ago, and she states that she just wants her own space. I get it, but we did have this conversation before I moved in.

I was not looking for a relationship when we met having gone through a very traumatic marriage, but having trusted and fallen in love I cannot imagine life without her.

I still feel that I have so much love to give, but I don't want it to curdle to resentment inside.

Life can be so sad at times, we don't bounce so well as we get older.

Zevon said:

Today, I will leave the home that I have shared with my partner off and on for the last 18 months, and permanently for the last 6. Seems odd to start with the home but it was in an area that represented new opportunities to me. I will be moving back close to my old area, which whilst offering support is not ideal from the self perspective point of view, as I feel so ashamed and embarrassed at the failed relationship.

The reason we are separating is quite simple, my partner states that she just wants to live on her own. I am the only man she has lived with since her divorce over 10 years ago. Her daughter lived with her until a year ago, and she states that she just wants her own space. I get it, but we did have this conversation before I moved in.

I was not looking for a relationship when we met having gone through a very traumatic marriage, but having trusted and fallen in love I cannot imagine life without her.

I still feel that I have so much love to give, but I don't want it to curdle to resentment inside.

Life can be so sad at times, we don't bounce so well as we get older.

Click to expand...

hmm well love for us over 50's is quite possible and happens all the time. Age is a number nothing more. There are a lot of us who bare the burdens and scars from a life lived for a half century. But you know what I have learned? One can wallow in the loneliness, despair and heartbreak. Or one can look to Monty Python for inspiration.

Cheer up, Zevon. You know what they say.
Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
Don't grumble, give a whistle!
And this'll help things turn out for the best
And

Always look on the bright side of life!

Always look on the bright side of life
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten!
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing,

When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps,
Just purse your lips and whistle -- that's the thing!
And always look on the bright side of life

Come on!

Always look on the bright side of life

For life is quite absurd,
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow!
Forget about your sin -- give the audience a grin,
Enjoy it, it's the last chance anyhow!

So always look on the bright side of death!
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
Life's a piece of honeysuckle,
When you look at it.

Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true,
You'll see it's all a show,
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you!

And always look on the bright side of life

Always look on the bright side of life

Come on guys, cheer up

Always look on the bright side of life

Always look on the bright side of life

Worse things happen at sea you know

Always look on the bright side of life

I mean, what have you got to lose?
you know, you come from nothing
you're going back to nothing
what have you lost? Nothing!

Always look on the bright side of life

Songwriters
ERIC IDLE

Published by
Lyrics © BMG RIGHTS MANAGEMENT US, LLC

Song Discussions is protected by U.S. Patent 9401941. Other patents pending.

Now, whats this daft female saying, when I am heartbroken ? I do not feel much like looking on the 'Bright side of Life.'  I have been there myself, wallowed in it. It bloody hurts. I have suffered from clinical depression my whole life. But one is never to old to begin again. It is hard, but it was hard when we were young to. We just do not take notice of it then..  We just were more full of wonder for something new. Had more, less years of knowing. It is possible to succeed and continue to grow at any age. I have done it. Do I have my bad days absolutely, I just choose to face them with a inner push, than give up.  Do not fear, hold your head up Zevon, say buggar em.. do not feel so ashamed and embarrassed at the failed relationship. You are moving on, changing like a butterfly. I have learned things happen for a reason, even if you do not think so at the time. YOU are not alone, many of us have gone through it. Time heals just be yourself look for that star, that is not forgotten in your drawer.. Bright Blessings Zevon..pm me, if you need support or even to tell me to piss off <-- but I hope not as that is frowned on.... Just know you are not alone and I do not mind..

Its not an end but a beginning! You have never truly failed...you have received feedback that you need to try a different course of action. The only true failing is to stop trying. Begin again...or....if you still love this person...figure out what went wrong and correct the behavior if you can. Nothing is ever etched in stone...and you have her have HISTORY.

Emotionally detach from you actions in the past and analyze it objectively. what worked what didnt build on that.

It isn’t so much about age, as it is about who we are.  Since you are participating in this forum, I’m guessing you’re a brother in social dysfunction; introverted, the loner’s club, shy, or just anti-social like myself.  People like us, take hits harder than the rest of the world. That girl for instance, breaking up with you – she’s the whole world for people like you and I. That as opposed to everyone else with normal social status and circles where sure, the break up will hurt, but not as much as it does with us.

After my toxic 23 year marriage ended, I dove right into online dating, and had some success.  That really was the bulk of my socializing, the dates, and relationships. I ended up in a three year relationship with a much younger woman, and our life together became comfortable and familiar.  And…I couldn’t believe it was over when she broke up with me. While I’m not a stalker, I’m more understanding about the reasoning behind why some people, mainly lonely introverted anti-social people might do it.  I’m guessing because they just have a more challenging time actually coming to terms with reality of a relationship being over, for good.  I’m in a loving relationship now, for the past year and a half.  There was a year between the younger woman and this girlfriend, and in that year of being alone, I didn’t know what to do about the loneliness and emptiness. Without that relationship, I had nothing, no focus, no purpose other than going to work, and coming home.  I dated as much as I could to fill in the blanks, ghosted a bunch of women that were bad matches….. not a good system, but weekends, holidays, evenings, other than walking my dog, working out, watching tv, life just seemed so empty and purposeless. The loneliness was very difficult, and almost shameful because I didn’t want to admit to ANYONE that I was lonely.  Watching others go about their lives, with friends and family, and I have myself.

I have no answers, I’m a man that fills those empty spaces with dating and relationships.  I am a loner, but I dislike being single.  I like my home with someone to share. My current girlfriend is younger, not as young as the last one, but has young children. One is 7, the other is 15.  I adore her, she’s an introvert so between the two of us, we isolate each other from the rest of the world and are a world unto ourselves.

What I can offer, is empathy instead of advice.  Your familiar surroundings, and the familiarity of your lost relationship hurts, and feels like a weight I’m guessing if its anything like what I went through. Sorry it happened to you.

And by the way, I'm 50, soon to be 51.

There is one thing worse than being lonely. It is being stuck in an enviolent surrounded by people and feeling unwanted.
I am alone and I am over 50 and I keep busy enough to never really be alone. The holidays hit hard but the rest of the year I am quite happy. 

2017 is my cleanup year.