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Am I better off alone? Reaching out to people who don't reach back.
#21
(01-05-2017, 07:53 AM)Karen Wrote:  If you marry an only child, as I did, and you have no siblings yourself, you end up like this and it seems nobody wants to hang out with you when you are an older adult.  They are all too busy "living their own lives".  I don't regret not having kids, but I would like to have had a brother and sister.  But that just was not in the cards. This life sucks!
Karen

I have a sister and sometimes she can be more trouble than she is worth. But I agree at least I have someone to do things with on the holiday.  I am reminded of the "Doors" song... people are strange when your a stranger. That is how I feel.  The more I am alone the less they want to hang out with me.  I am not sure why groups don't form of loners for precisely this reason but for some reason they don't seem to work. 

A few years ago I did just that... started a local group specifically for people looking for others to support them locally. I am sorry to say it fell apart. I was surprised that people that needed help were some of the first to leave. My suspicion is this. These single person groups can attract *USERS* who might really have other options. When they get sick of you for whatever reason they just go back to whatever else they have going on. 

But with all the apps out there have you noticed... there is a dearth of things for lonely and or alone people.
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#22
My whole family were a social rejection to be honest

My grandmother was German and was a social person growing up, really active.Her friends were bombed in the war and she met my grandfather on the train about 1945 and she hid him with her mother and father in aid and possibly some other POW's. She came over here with lots of prejudice. I am not sure about her social life. My great grandparents (her parents) came over here and spent their entire life for 30 years indoors. My grandfather went to the dairy but otherwise they had NOBODY. Literally. My great grandmother stayed home since the 40's to the 70's when she died. She eventually died in a rest home away from home.
Even our extended relations want nothing to do with our family and still don't to this day from back then. I've tried reaching out, they want no interest. Even my mother was shunned.
I don't know much about my grandfather but he was a hard worker. Not sure about friends. He died in the 70s. My grandmother died a few years ago and she lived alone and loved it. She avoided people by walking across the street. She had family visit her, but no friends. They used her anyway (her first daughters children) for money and even came to our place for things. They only cared about her wealth. Other visits were my mum, me, her other daughter and their kids. But rarely. Mum visited constantly. But nan was ok on her own. She was a hard person. No feeling or emotion. She felt no need for companionship.

My mother had the odd friend or so but no visitors to the home. She hasn't had a friend since the 60's as a child or the odd person shed talk to in the 70's at work.

My stepfather has no family at all. He was adopted and they died years ago. He seemed OK at school and that. He went to school with my mother and they got into contact via an old school friends site. He has two old school friends on Facebook but they don't reach out to him.

I never had connections with anyone. My life has been the same. I did have a few girls come to the home but they just didn't stay in my life and they used me. I've been alone 12 years. It's really isolating. I live with my mother and stepfather and literally, no one visits us. None of us have ANYONE. No one sees how we are, doesn't call, don't text..nothing.

It's sad but a lot of people die and aren't found to like a decade later. I think that will be me one day. But it's life. I am glad the Internet exists so I can talk about it. I've made many efforts but somehow it just never works out. I have made myself appealing by being friendly, kind, texting. Trying it all. But somehow they all aren't interested. It is really hurtful and I do get into deep depressions over It. I'm not trying anymore and giving it a rest.
emptiness is the friend of my emptiness
[Image: tumblr_static_filename_640_v2.gif]
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