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Being the only non-parent around parents
#21
(12-09-2016, 02:46 PM)Tealeaf Wrote: I started at a new workplace recently and one thing I noticed is that, except for two men, all my coworkers are women. Another thing I noticed: they're all parents. They talk about their children, their children's problems, keep in touch on social media, etc.

Meanwhile I'm getting on in my 20's, unmarried, single, no children. Trying to rebuild my life after depression. I feel almost like a child myself next to them.

Is it seen as strange to be this way? I wonder sometimes what people think of me.

The only thing that I can advise you is to want children for more logical reasons and not emotional.

All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by now they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

"The future belongs to those who prepare for it today"- Malcolm X

Prepare for the future well, take your time with your choice. Evaluate your choice before bringing a baby to this world that you may not want or he might not want life.
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#22
(12-17-2016, 09:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote: All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by know they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

Um....WHAT?????  First, you don't know why they had their children.  And second, you have no idea how much they want their children, regardless of whether they have freedom or not.  That's seriously fucked up. 

Are YOU a parent?
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#23
(12-17-2016, 09:21 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 09:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote: All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by now they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

Um....WHAT?????  First, you don't know why they had their children.  And second, you have no idea how much they want their children, regardless of whether they have freedom or not.  That's seriously fucked up. 

Are YOU a parent?
Callie, just speaking from experience of the conversations that I had with my mom.
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#24
(12-17-2016, 10:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 09:21 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 09:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote: All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by now they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

Um....WHAT?????  First, you don't know why they had their children.  And second, you have no idea how much they want their children, regardless of whether they have freedom or not.  That's seriously fucked up. 

Are YOU a parent?
Callie, just speaking from experience of the conversations that I had with my mom.

So ONE person says that and it's true for everyone?  While there are times I would like to have a little more "freedom," that certainly does NOT mean I don't want my kids "as much."  I wouldn't trade my kids for anything in the world, especially not "freedom."
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 

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#25
(12-17-2016, 10:14 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 10:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 09:21 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 09:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote: All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by now they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

Um....WHAT?????  First, you don't know why they had their children.  And second, you have no idea how much they want their children, regardless of whether they have freedom or not.  That's seriously fucked up. 

Are YOU a parent?
Callie, just speaking from experience of the conversations that I had with my mom.

So ONE person says that and it's true for everyone?  While there are times I would like to have a little more "freedom," that certainly does NOT mean I don't want my kids "as much."  I wouldn't trade my kids for anything in the world, especially not "freedom."

I dont know how many among you evaluate your decision of having a child, in that respect I might have been ignorant. But not in the context the OP was evaluating things. She seemed to feel bad because others were parents. You dont bring children to this world because of some jealousy.
You bring children when you evaluate how would they feel about themselves and life when they are in their teens, young adulthood and beyond.
Does the OP really wants to be a mother because of the age she reached or because her colleagues are parents? or wouldnt it be better for her to bring children because of reasons of meeting the right spouse, having enough wealth to bring a child, having the wisdom to teach him how to be great, looking good so that he will benefit from her and his genes, among other deep and not superficial factors!
Wouldnt you agree?

"When everything goes against you, remember an airplane take off against the wind not with it" - Henry Ford.
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#26
The OP never said she wanted children....just that she didn't have any.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 

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#27
(12-17-2016, 10:28 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The OP never said she wanted children....just that she didn't have any.

She implied she wanted.

"A goal without a plan is just a wish."
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#28
I agree with neworder 100%
I'm actually David Blane.
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#29
(12-17-2016, 10:38 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote:
(12-17-2016, 10:28 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The OP never said she wanted children....just that she didn't have any.

She implied she wanted.

"A goal without a plan is just a wish."

Where?
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 

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#30
(12-17-2016, 09:12 PM)NewOrder2016 Wrote:
(12-09-2016, 02:46 PM)Tealeaf Wrote: I started at a new workplace recently and one thing I noticed is that, except for two men, all my coworkers are women. Another thing I noticed: they're all parents. They talk about their children, their children's problems, keep in touch on social media, etc.

Meanwhile I'm getting on in my 20's, unmarried, single, no children. Trying to rebuild my life after depression. I feel almost like a child myself next to them.

Is it seen as strange to be this way? I wonder sometimes what people think of me.

The only thing that I can advise you is to want children for more logical reasons and not emotional.

All those mothers had their children for emotional reasons, and by now they understood that they dont want their child as much as before and lost their freedoms to do the things they could have and wanted to do in the past when they werent a parent.

"The future belongs to those who prepare for it today"- Malcolm X

Prepare for the future well, take your time with your choice. Evaluate your choice before bringing a baby to this world that you may not want or he might not want life.

It doesn't matter when you have your kids, you still lose some form of freedom having them. Being a parent is about sacrifice. Unless you're rich and pass them off to nannies all the time.
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