Christmas day

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Bluey

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Spending it alone, ent it great, all thos happy feel good Christmas films to make you feel even more isolated from the world then you all ready do. 

The only thing that's Burt a smile to my face this morning is watching the Simpsons. Gotta love them.

For now I am hungry and I really can't be botherd with cooking so it's a microwave meal Christmas dinner... Oh happy days!
 
* M * E * R * R * Y * * X * M * A * S *

For various reasons I can't be bothered with it this year - I'm having a frozen curry later on!
 
I am alone and watching a D.V.D I am having pizza (not even a take away). But I Know how you feel.
I hope the rest of the day goes quickly for you.
 
I went to a meal at a church which was doing Christmas dinners for people on their own. It was ok, better than being on my own all day.


I'm not sure where my comment went but will add it again. I went to a church on Christmas Day which was offering a Christmas Dinner to anyone on their own. I'd heard about these events before but hadn't gone as I'd thought that it might make me feel even more of a loser, but it was ok. To the OP and anyone who is on their own on Christmas Day, I would recommend finding somewhere local which offers a Christmas Dinner to people on their own. It isn't ideal, but it is better than being alone all day.
 
Glad you found the experience positive. I would find that an absolute nightmare sitting in a room with people I don't even know pretending to like them in the hope that someone would talk back to me, but each to their own. I prefer my own company.
 
It's the day after now, and my Christmas wasn't that cheery but it wasn't any trauma either.

I just want to comment on the idea of spending Christmas with strangers at a group event....no it isn't ideal but it CAN be better than a lot of alternatives and I can easily envision a time when I might do it again. Again? Yeah. I once deliberately drove to the nearest major airport, San Francisco International at that time for me, just so I could spend Christmas Eve at the airport bar. Yeah. I figured anybody who's at the bar that night is either disconnected or stranded or something......and they all were, as was I. I was disconnected from any kind of normal social network while most of the others were just stranded via traveling.......but it was OK, sort of.....we weren't alone, we had The Airport Bar. It wasn't a drinking problem thing really, it was just a slightly desperate refuge kind of thing. Even the bartender and the other personnel doing the Christmas Eve shift at the airport were in on it in their own way.....all of us lost from where we wished we were, but it was OK, sort of.....we had each other and The Airport Bar.

Maybe someday I'll have to seek out a sanctuary like that again....an airport bar, a homeless shelter (..I'd probably being one of the volunteers but I'd still be one of the lost ones..), maybe my own church.....but it would be OK, sort of, better than a lot of the alternatives.
 
Tiina63 said:
I went to a meal at a church which was doing Christmas dinners for people on their own.  It was ok, better than being on my own all day.


I'm not sure where my comment went but will add it again.  I went to a church on Christmas Day which was offering a Christmas Dinner to anyone on their own.  I'd heard about these events before but hadn't gone as I'd thought that it might make me feel even more of a loser, but it was ok.  To the OP and anyone who is on their own on Christmas Day, I would recommend finding somewhere local which offers a Christmas Dinner to people on their own.  It isn't ideal, but it is better than being alone all day.




I nearly did this. I sew a post by a church on my FB with some people that I know.
I don't really believe in god an all that so would of felt like a hypocrite by going so did what a lot here did and just had a frozen meal by myself.


sentiententity said:
To the op, I definitely agree with you regarding the Simpsons. That show can take the sting out of a lonely day.

Yea, Your not wrong.
It is about the only thing I watch on telly with any regularity :)
 
Christmas is a lonely time.  I never understood that until the past few years.  Everything changed and now Christmas is just a reminder of what was.  It's not easy.  Hoping things will get better in the future.
 
Tiina63 said:
I went to a meal at a church which was doing Christmas dinners for people on their own.  It was ok, better than being on my own all day.






I admire what you did and also I want to thank you for being nice to me in the past.
 
It can be hard to find positive people to be around. A holiday or birthday is just another day for me.

I chose to spend mine on the road this year spending time with people I had not seen in years. It's definitely not the best Christmas I have had, but not the worst.
 
Two days after Xmas, and, still struggling here. It was another Xmas alone, so, no surprises there, but, maybe that it what made it so much harder. Have been to those community and charity lunches before, and, for me they were never any good. They didn’t take any of the loneliness away, and most of the time they just try and ram religion down your throat along with the lukewarm food.

Nobody to talk with online either. That makes the isolation feel even worse.
 
For all of us that don't have happy homes, mates, or good families to share Christmas with,  loneliness is clearly exasperated during the Christmas New Year's holiday season.  I see 3 options for dealing with this:

First, one can take the Scrooge attitude by hating, rejecting, or avoiding the occasion as much as possible.  And while many people do this, it sure seems like a sad path to willingly follow - one that must be refaced each year.  I'd suggest that such a choice is a poor one that only adds to life's disappointments unnecessarily. 

Second, one can make the best effort possible by reaching out to others and enjoying a piece of the extra cheer and social gatherings that prevail everywhere. Tiina63, you did good going to a church function, even if it wasn't a complete fulfillment of your needs.  And Constant stranger, you did good trying an airport bar, even if it wasn't a complete fulfillment of your needs.  I myself used to go out to my favorite country bar on Christmas Eve, finding the place almost completely empty.  But, it made for an easy conversation with the few others who were there and ultimately gave me a little bit of the human companionship I needed.  No, it didn't negate the feelings of loneliness, but it helped me better cope with them for a couple of hours at least and served as a good and legitimate diversion.  Don't forget, your befriending another lonely soul on Christmas Eve may very well be an act of love and grace from yourself to another, and that's a worthwhile effort.

Before moving on to the next point, I'd like to counter Bluey's comment about attending a Christmas church function as a non-believer.  I don't think anyone at most any church would consider that an act of hypocrisy.  Understand, most churches have a number of unbelievers in attendance every week, and they're quite welcome.  Of course, it is the hope of all church members that the unbelievers will eventually join the family with their beliefs, but it's only through their love and acceptance of them that this might happen.  Meanwhile, I'd recommend any good Christian church as a great place to spend part of Christmas Eve.  Believer or not, you'll be welcomed there amongst strangers more than most places.  I finally realized this myself when I traded my Christmas Eve bar for a great church service.  It WAS awkward walking in alone and seeing all the family groups and friends who knew each other.  But, I enjoyed the service, had many friendly greetings, and walked out knowing it was a great thing to do. I realize too that if I'd do that every week, I'd soon be one of those groups of friends who knew each other.  No hypocrisy there to worry about.  You're on safe ground.
 
Third, one can go beyond the secular traditions and focus on the religious meaning of the occasion.  For anyone knowing and loving Jesus, celebrating his birth as Creator, Lord, and Savior can be a very personal, satisfying, and enjoyable affair - even if alone.  It's the same with heaven.  People will some day cry when they're not allowed there, choosing instead an eternal life of torment over one of paradise.  Yet, they were invited and chose to reject the one who lovingly invited them.  Might I suggest that embracing the Christian meaning of the holiday season can not only make the occasion something to look forward to and celebrate, but might also provide some added peace and joy to every year of the rest of your life.  You might think about that before the next Christmas season rolls around - with another year of your life passed.   
 
I've spent christmas on my own for years and i love it!!! I cook a big meal and anything thats left over i freeze and have over the next few weeks. This way nothing is wasted. I watch films on the day and listen to Christmas songs.

I absolutely love Christmas, where i live the city normally empties and i have Christmas of work. I normally book to see art exhibtions etc to fill the time.

I know that Christmas can be a hard time for many on this forum, especially if you are used to spending Christmas with others. Sending virtual hugs to all those who had an awful Christmas and wishing everyone a better 2020.
 

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