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EveWasFramed

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I take care of refilling my stepson's ADD meds every month. He takes Concerta. 
I've questioned his running out early before but basically I'm made to feel like it was just an error on my part, that I miscalculated. Well, this time, I made him present me with the bottle. He gave me the empty bottle and said he'd put the rest of them in a ziploc bag and took them with him to his mom's house where he'd stayed three days last week (he came home Sunday evening). He said he ran out at his mother's, that's why the bottle was empty. 
I called the pharmacy to see when I'd picked them up last. I got them the evening of Dec 1st and it was 30 pills. He didn't take one from that bottle until Dec 2nd (maybe - he isn't good at taking them every day). That means that today, he should have had two pills left over. If he ran out at his mother's the vey last day, this means he had nearly a week's worth of pills missing. 
I told his dad what was going on and he blew it off. So, I asked my stepson about it in front of his dad and that's when he came up with the I ran out at mom's story. Well even the hubby didn't buy that. 
So, he pointed out that he shouldn't have been out. Then my stepson quickly said that he had thrown them out because he felt he was doing better and didn't need them. He said he was wrong and would start taking them again. This from the person who, just about a month ago, asked his doctor to raise his dosage because he was failing all of his classes. 
None of this makes sense to me. Anyone care to share any thoughts on this?
 
DarkSelene said:
Do you think he's taking more than he should?

I don't know. We're hard pressed to get him to take meds even when he's sick and on antibiotics. Four months ago, it was a struggle to get him to take his once a day dose. 
I did a little reasesrch and it seems ADD and ADHD meds are popular in high schools for selling and/or getting high. I think they sell for $4 - $5 per pill. 
I'm not saying he's selling them or getting high off of them. All I know for sure is that he is missing about a week's worth THAT I KNOW OF. I can't know when the bottle was actually emptied.
 
Sounds like he's withholding information for some reason and "quickly" coming up with a cover story.

Does the young man believe the adults in his life are his benefactors or his adversaries?
 
constant stranger said:
Sounds like he's withholding information for some reason and "quickly" coming up with a cover story.

Does the young man believe the adults in his life are his benefactors or his adversaries?

Hmm. I've only known him for about two years. In this time, I've observed too many ridiculous lies to count. Even about small things that won't even land him in trouble. He hates his mother and shamelessly uses his father. He's highly defensive and gets angry if he even THINKS someone is accusing him of lying. 
So how do you think he sees the adults in his life, CS? Is this enough info to form an opinion?
What kind of a difference do you think his view would make? Thanks for the response.
 
Uh Oh.....pretty adversarial.....

Maybe you should plan for the worst then...he's getting high and selling them too.

Is there a money trail to follow? Any kids at school that would inform on him?
 
I wonder if he's selling them or giving them to other people. I saw this on a TV show before, the sister was selling her brothers ADD medication at school, then in another season she was taking them herself to help her focus and stay awake longer.
 
Thanks for the replies, guys.
I doubt that any of his friends would tell. In fact, the one friend I discovered was smoking pot on my back porch hasn't been back up here since (that I'm aware of).
No money trail to follow - if he gets money, it's gone within days. He gets $80 on the first of each month and blows it on fast food and gas for his buddies car.
I know that some teens sell or hand out their meds to school friends. I simply have no evidence other than the pills are just GONE. He claims he threw them out. I'm about 99.8% sure that's a lie to cover his initial lie. His lies are generally far-fetched. Im not sure the young people he hangs out with are such good citizens either. Unfortunately, it's frowned upon when I point out things, and it's said that I appear to be "picking on the boy." Makes me not want to involve myself at all, but I'm the one responsible for him through the week. I'm also the one who gets his prescriptions filled. I'm not sure how I feel about giving him a controlled substances if he's misusing it ( whether it's really disposing of them, taking too many, selling or giving them away). If I had proof, and the parents wouldn't do anything, I'd flatly refuse to be involved in obtaining the medicine for him. I won't be a part of any potential illegal activity.
 
EveWasFramed said:
Thanks for the replies, guys.
I doubt that any of his friends would tell. In fact, the one friend I discovered was smoking pot on my back porch hasn't been back up here since (that I'm aware of).
No money trail to follow - if he gets money, it's gone within days. He gets $80 on the first of each month and blows it on fast food and gas for his buddies car.
I know that some teens sell or hand out their meds to school friends. I simply have no evidence other than the pills are just GONE. He claims he threw them out. I'm about 99.8% sure that's a lie to cover his initial lie. His lies are generally far-fetched. Im not sure the young people he hangs out with are such good citizens either. Unfortunately, it's frowned upon when I point out things, and it's said that I appear to be "picking on the boy." Makes me not want to involve myself at all, but I'm the one responsible for him through the week. I'm also the one who gets his prescriptions filled. I'm not sure how I feel about giving him a controlled substances if he's misusing it ( whether it's really disposing of them, taking too many, selling or giving them away). If I had proof, and the parents wouldn't do anything, I'd flatly refuse to be involved in obtaining the medicine for him. I won't be a part of any potential illegal activity.

Been down this road as a teenager and then as the parent of a teenager. Drug test. They sell kits. This young man will throw a honeysuckle-fit, however, he can't be left to rule over a kingdom of lies. What kind of favor would ya'll be doing him if you taught him he can just go on lying and lying with no consequence. He needs a smack of reality. It won't be pretty. But it may save his life down the line.
 
bleed_the_freak said:
EveWasFramed said:
Thanks for the replies, guys.
I doubt that any of his friends would tell. In fact, the one friend I discovered was smoking pot on my back porch hasn't been back up here since (that I'm aware of).
No money trail to follow - if he gets money, it's gone within days. He gets $80 on the first of each month and blows it on fast food and gas for his buddies car.
I know that some teens sell or hand out their meds to school friends. I simply have no evidence other than the pills are just GONE. He claims he threw them out. I'm about 99.8% sure that's a lie to cover his initial lie. His lies are generally far-fetched. Im not sure the young people he hangs out with are such good citizens either. Unfortunately, it's frowned upon when I point out things, and it's said that I appear to be "picking on the boy." Makes me not want to involve myself at all, but I'm the one responsible for him through the week. I'm also the one who gets his prescriptions filled. I'm not sure how I feel about giving him a controlled substances if he's misusing it ( whether it's really disposing of them, taking too many, selling or giving them away). If I had proof, and the parents wouldn't do anything, I'd flatly refuse to be involved in obtaining the medicine for him. I won't be a part of any potential illegal activity.

Been down this road as a teenager and then as the parent of a teenager. Drug test. They sell kits. This young man will throw a honeysuckle-fit, however, he can't be left to rule over a kingdom of lies. What kind of favor would ya'll be doing him if you taught him he can just go on lying and lying with no consequence. He needs a smack of reality. It won't be pretty. But it may save his life down the line.
What I think he needs (and I fully agree with you) isn't what he will get. Only his parents can make that call, unfortunately.
 
Maybe a tough approach would work to scare him into changing his behavior: Graphically show him the end results of somebody who's gone down the path he's following.

A lady I knew in college had a way out-of-control coke habit and her well-to-do parents found out how bad it was when she sold the Porsche they gave her. They acquired some post-mortem autopsy photographs of the corroded nasal passages and battered body of a long time coke snorting young woman who was eventually murdered by one of the men she whored herself to for coke money.....which by the way, the lady I knew also did.

I saw those pics and it was really horrible.

Sad to say it didn't work. She drifted away from all of us and eventually we all lost touch with her. If coke didn't kill her AIDS probably did.
 
Personally since there is suspicion of something going on here other than what he claims I'd refuse to fill his prescriptions until he came clean with the truth. Make his father or mother have them refilled and if they don't like that you don't believe him then too bad for them. Maybe it will put a hint more of suspicion in their minds. All you need is a seed for a plant to grow. But that's me personally.
 
Sci-Fi said:
Personally since there is suspicion of something going on here other than what he claims I'd refuse to fill his prescriptions until he came clean with the truth.  Make his father or mother have them refilled and if they don't like that you don't believe him then too bad for them.  Maybe it will put a hint more of suspicion in their minds.  All you need is a seed for a plant to grow.  But that's me personally.

He will lie to the bitter end. He and his brother are of the opinion that if it can't be PROVEN that they're lying, there are no consequences to be faced. It's true mostly - their parents won't do anything without 100% proof (and even then, it's a crap shoot to get them to act). His dad DID tell him to leave the bottle where we can find it at any given time, so I guess he realizes he's not being honest. 
I'll be checking the bottle now.
 
Huh, sounds like you have to baby him and treat him like a child. Keep the bottle and give him his pill everyday so he's not "throwing them out".

LOL be like when my mom used to give one of our dogs their heart medication, the dog was a smart little mutt she could find those things. My mom had to stick it in her mouth and rub her throat to get the dog to swallow the pill, even had to check under her tongue to make sure our dog didn't hide it under there.
 
Hi Eve,

I think Sci-Fi just gave the best option available to you, make that controlled substance controlled again, wether he is selling them, throwing them out, sharing them or over using is a non factor in this, he has proven to not be responsible enough to control his own medication by coming up short. Thats the one thing you can prove and he will have to face those consequences.

Just another thought but have you ever counted out your perscription? It wouldn't be the first apothecary to skim for his own use or personal gain.
 
Thanks, Sci and Mr. L.
Lol...the dog thing made me chuckle, as I envisioned my stepson in the dog's place.
Mr L - I count the number of pills in any bottle of controlled medication I pick up (there are only two - his and I take Ambien for sleep).
Handing them out once a day (or maybe leaving one on the counter every night so he will have it before school) seems like a fine idea to me. It won't keep him from collecting them (whether he sells, gives away or takes too many at once) but there's not much else to do. I even considered telling his doctor (also my doctor) of my suspicions. That wouldn't go over well with his parents, as the meds are something he's supposed to take so he can focus in school.
I walk a fine like with the parents. Don't do enough and I don't care. Tell on him too often and I'm picking on him. Most of the time I can't seem to figure out when to say something and when not to.
I can't, in good conscience, ignore things that could lead him down a dangerous road. At least not yet anyway - his parents will likely ignore me one too many times and I'll wash my hands of at all.
 
EveWasFramed said:
I did a little reasesrch and it seems ADD and ADHD meds are popular in high schools for selling and/or getting high. I think they sell for $4 - $5 per pill.

That was going to be my first guess when you said he was making up weird excuses for not having all of his meds.
 
blackdot said:
EveWasFramed said:
I did a little reasesrch and it seems ADD and ADHD meds are popular in high schools for selling and/or getting high. I think they sell for $4 - $5 per pill.

That was going to be my first guess when you said he was making up weird excuses for not having all of his meds.

I wish I knew for sure but I don't have any proof of what's going on.
 
MisterLonely said:
Hi Eve,

I think Sci-Fi just gave the best option available to you, make that controlled substance controlled again, wether he is selling them, throwing them out, sharing them or over using is a non factor in this, he has proven to not be responsible enough to control his own medication by coming up short. Thats the one thing you can prove and he will have to face those consequences.

Just another thought but have you ever counted out your perscription? It wouldn't be the first apothecary to skim for his own use or personal gain.

+1
 

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