Intro... to me

Hi,

Thanks for this site...

I didn't know where to begin as an intro of myself...  so I thought what's in my mind to start...
First I'm in a marriage I can't get out and is a constant degrading  relationship and in a job that continues to make me regret it...
On top of that I discovered many things about myself that produces many regrets ...
with some of that brings the following thoughts:

When i look around it seem everyone else has a better life then me.

When i see people I feel invisible.

I notice many people who forget me.

I feel awkward around other people.

It hurts when I'm on Facebook and don't see anyone looking for me.

I say things in a group that gets ignored or seems they heard nothing I said.

Everyday feels a lonely life yet there are so many people around me...

I always look for a moment to want to talk to someone but.. I choke that I will say the wrong thing...

I'm not suicidal just very lonely... 

Thanks for anyone reading this...

Hi, welcome to forum

There are other people who can relate to the statements you mentioned. Hope you find some friendships and connection here.

Whatever decisions you regret, try to concentrate on present time and future and how you can improve your social life now. Past memories and actions if neither teaches us a lesson nor brings us sweet smile, are not much to be reminded of repeatedly. Hopefully a peaceful life will take over any regrets you may have.

In many ways I can relate to you.  I'm always surrounded by people but the loneliness is always there.  Sometimes I think that I'm just ungrateful, but I just can not ignore the big hole in my soul.  It may sound stupid but I believe that that place is reserved for someone special that in some way will complete me.

Hello and welcome to the forum!

I hopeyou find what your looking for!

Welcome.
Happy New Year fellow lonely soul.
My short advice is.
Its not yet too late why dont you start and redo your life the way you think its supposed to be. Dont wait for too late.
You can do something about it.
Its not about comparing yourself to others but its about you doing the things you want and achieving your dreams and goals.
I am a good testimony of it.
I was once in unhappy marriage with kids.
but I figured i need a life on my own on my own terms. Life wasnt easy when I tried to reset everything but after 4 yrs i am beginning to harvest and see my hardships.
Its not about others its only about you.
What you want, what you can do and what will make you happy. In the end we will only be accountable to ourself. Goodluck Brother.
May and Happiness to you.

MisterLonely said:

Hello and welcome to the forum!

I hopeyou find what your looking for!

Click to expand...

Thank you.  I hope so too.

Hopetracer said:

Hi, welcome to forum

There are other people who can relate to the statements you mentioned. Hope you find some friendships and connection here.

Whatever decisions you regret, try to concentrate on present time and future and how you can improve your social life now. Past memories and actions if neither teaches us a lesson nor brings us sweet smile, are not much to be reminded of repeatedly. Hopefully a peaceful life will take over any regrets you may have.

Click to expand...

I agree with Hope, but want to add that you should focus on yourself, instead of what other people have.  Stop judging people based on their outside appearances.  You can't know that someone has a better life than you just by looking at them. Hell, you can't know that by talking to them or reading about them.  You never know what kind of skeletons are in other people's closets and appearances can definitely be deceiving.

It seems like you are more worried about all of the things you mentioned than other people probably are.  I think perhaps it's your current situation that is making you so negative.  You are stuck (why are you stuck?) and that keeps you anxious, so you are likely projecting that out to everyone else. 

As for the saying the wrong thing, everyone says the wrong thing at some point.  You just have to apologize if you offended someone and move on.  Or laugh it off if it was just awkward.

Claudia39 said:

In many ways I can relate to you.  I'm always surrounded by people but the loneliness is always there.  Sometimes I think that I'm just ungrateful, but I just can not ignore the big hole in my soul.  It may sound stupid but I believe that that place is reserved for someone special that in some way will complete me.

Click to expand...

I know what you mean... I do recognize the hole and I sometimes think all reservations were missed ... As times passes the hole seems to get deeper and wider and don't really look to full fill it but I a much a seeker... maybe there's a chance... thanks for your thoughts... to me sometimes I don't think I'm ungrateful but selfish....

Hopetracer said:

Hi, welcome to forum

There are other people who can relate to the statements you mentioned. Hope you find some friendships and connection here.

Whatever decisions you regret, try to concentrate on present time and future and how you can improve your social life now. Past memories and actions if neither teaches us a lesson nor brings us sweet smile, are not much to be reminded of repeatedly. Hopefully a peaceful life will take over any regrets you may have.

Click to expand...

Thanks so much for the welcome.  It is true with the regrets I do concentrate on the present yet I didn't know I was doing that, which you are right.  Even though they are still there they seem to subside for any good that I do. Thanks so much for putting that into prospective.

Gerard75 said:

Claudia39 said:

In many ways I can relate to you.  I'm always surrounded by people but the loneliness is always there.  Sometimes I think that I'm just ungrateful, but I just can not ignore the big hole in my soul.  It may sound stupid but I believe that that place is reserved for someone special that in some way will complete me.

Click to expand...

I know what you mean... I do recognize the hole and I sometimes think all reservations were missed ... As times passes the hole seems to get deeper and wider and don't really look to full fill it but I a much a seeker... maybe there's a chance... thanks for your thoughts... to me sometimes I don't think I'm ungrateful but selfish....

Click to expand...

Is it really selfish to be want to be happy?

lonelycrying1 said:

Welcome.
Happy New Year fellow lonely soul.
My short advice is.
Its not yet too late why dont you start and redo your life the way you  think its supposed to be.  Dont wait  for too late.
You can do something about  it.
Its not  about comparing yourself to others but its about you  doing the things you want and achieving your dreams and goals.
I am a good testimony of it.
I was once in unhappy marriage with kids.
but I figured i need a life on my own on my own terms. Life wasnt easy when I tried to reset everything but after 4 yrs i am beginning to harvest and see my hardships.
Its not about others its only about you.
What you want, what  you can do and what will make you happy.  In the end we will only be accountable to ourself.  Goodluck Brother.
May and Happiness to you.

Click to expand...

That is a great idea... thanks for the welcome and Happy New Year!
I have been thinking of that for quite sometime since you mentioned it I just can't seem to find when or how... the truth is its money that prevents me taking that step.   When do you think its too late?  I hope i didnt miss it because sometimes maybe its been too far to do it because with out money its has been the hardest part to move forward. 
6 years I did that and went homeless for 6 months... had work yes but no place to live...  shelters have showers, places like a confident person to allow me to sleep at the job, which did give me the moment to save an make that step...  I don't know if I can do that again... it was a sensitve step by step process to get things back normal... but I had to get married...uggggh
It is true a marriage unhappy with... lucky I dont have kids with her... and i will never... but its a not easy...neither of us make enough to move forward... but I do cross my fingers in 3 months there may be that chance... maybe... phewwww... so hearvy this heart gets sometimes... but I do want life on my own terms... Thanks so much

Welcome.. and...........
...
....

... .good luck.

TheRealCallie said:

Hopetracer said:

Hi, welcome to forum

There are other people who can relate to the statements you mentioned. Hope you find some friendships and connection here.

Whatever decisions you regret, try to concentrate on present time and future and how you can improve your social life now. Past memories and actions if neither teaches us a lesson nor brings us sweet smile, are not much to be reminded of repeatedly. Hopefully a peaceful life will take over any regrets you may have.

Click to expand...

I agree with Hope, but want to add that you should focus on yourself, instead of what other people have.  Stop judging people based on their outside appearances.  You can't know that someone has a better life than you just by looking at them. Hell, you can't know that by talking to them or reading about them.  You never know what kind of skeletons are in other people's closets and appearances can definitely be deceiving.

It seems like you are more worried about all of the things you mentioned than other people probably are.  I think perhaps it's your current situation that is making you so negative.  You are stuck (why are you stuck?) and that keeps you anxious, so you are likely projecting that out to everyone else. 

As for the saying the wrong thing, everyone says the wrong thing at some point.  You just have to apologize if you offended someone and move on.  Or laugh it off if it was just awkward.

Click to expand...

Thanks... I know what you mean but I was say it what comes in my thoughts and I know that yes others lives are not as perfect either... it what crosses my thought... such as walking around in the street... 

It's just that instant though I am sure their lives are not any better then mine.  

You did make me think thought that yes I do feel stuck... and where it's coming from... 

It's from a marriage I once felt love in and a job I once felt close with others and learning from... it brings on a sadness that I do want to restart again like

Welcome, and this is the life you have. Go divorce whoever you dislike or find another way to try to increase the distance if that would be endangering you, go get another job if you can, be as happy and self-caring as you can, but do not forget other can feel the same way and need kindness. That's my advice ^_^
And the invisibility do seem to exist, no idea why, no idea how, it's still a shame.