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Does anyone else have this issue with online dating
#11
(01-11-2017, 10:20 AM)EmilyFoxSeaton Wrote: So I foolishly decided to sign up for POF. I have long sworn off online dating.  When I last did online dating I was under pressure to get married and have a kid. And now, that ship has largely sailed so I am doing anything now is just for me. So I figured it might be a different story. 

But I was reminded again that I have some sort of photographic dissonance with regard to online dating. Almost every guy on there, their photo repulses me. I am starting to think it is an issue only with the online dating format. Or in other words if you sat me down and showed me a series of total strangers I would find them all ugly.  But if I somehow knew them or knew of them or had seen them talk or just seen them walk in a room, I wouldn't find them ugly and or scary. 

But if say I knew the person without a photo for weeks and liked them or (just didn't hate them) if you showed me the photo then I would think it was just fine.

When I was online dating I didn't judge too harshly on the photos. Pretty much most people I met did not look like their photo. One person even went as far to use a celebrity's photo because he felt they had a striking resemblance (no he did not). Some people photograph better/ worse than their real self. In straight-on photos, my face is noticeably asymmetrical. In person, it isn't to most people (I hope). 

If you don't like their photo - that's fine. I certainly don't like my own haha. Are you comfortable with meeting some dates despite that?
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#12
(01-14-2017, 04:09 PM)Northern Lights Wrote: If you don't like their photo - that's fine. I certainly don't like my own haha. Are you comfortable with meeting some dates despite that?

It is kind of more frustrating than that because a negative photo can turn me off them as a person.  It is like that image extrapolates on to their personality and then it is hard to recover from that.   So someone who could be a good match for me might not be selected because of the image that the photo puts out there. 

I have decided to try not to look at the photos and just go on the results of the searches which match me.
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#13
You can try dating sites like Okcupid or eHarmony (this one is paid though) and try going on dates with those that have a high compatibility rating. Good luck...!
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