Am I useless?

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Heyaa !! Im 20 years old, finished high school last year. So basically I've done nothing whole one year.. I don't want to work right now(it may sound stupid to some of you) But I really feel so lazyy,depressed. I don't have any friends.. well I do have one friend, but she's in college so we see each other maybe two times at week. I'm afraid of work because I'm not good with people, I'm also fat and ugly.. I don't feel bored at all. I mean, I watch movies, tv, clean house.Does anybody else feels like this? XX
 
Nah. You're just lazy and stuck in your comfort zone. I've been there. =P

It happens to a lot of people after high school.
 
I was like that from 15 up to 24, then suddenly I just had enough and got a job, what helped me was working at a company both my sisters worked at at that time, I don't think I was lazy but it sure as hell seemed that way to the outside. If you're at home for any amount off time make sure not to get lazy, get a hobby that involves learning something should be fun ofcourse, something that interests you. Some people go to university for doctors/masters and don't start a job till their late 20's or even early 30's.

This might be really simplistic thinking on my part, but if you're afraid of work the best thing to get over it is probably finding a job,whats the worst that could happen, you'll quit or get fired and end up right where you are now :D
 
You're not useless but if you're stuck in this kind of rut it can make you feel bad, & take time to get out of. Making regular time for introspection can help you find the right way forwards for you, because it means getting to know what you want in your heart!
 
I've known people that have made it into their 30s (or, in an extreme example, early 40s, god forbid) before they entered the workforce, for a variety of reasons. Social anxiety is usually the reason that keeps people locked on their own little island; unfortunately, you can't overcome this feeling without facing it... every time you back down due to your fears, they gain a little bit more control over you.

My first job was actually at a burger place, and I was terrified of dealing with customers. It was bad enough coming to work every day and dealing with the staff- I was the lone English speaker in a kitchen filled with people that spoke mostly Spanish. It was me and a bunch of sassy, fiery Latinas from various countries... I wasn't so great at taking a ribbing at the time, so I quickly became the butt of the jokes. What "cured" me of my social anxiety was actually getting thrown on the drive-thru window... dealing with thousands of mouth breathing customers for 30-60 seconds at a time was almost like going speed dating for experience. I had to come out of my shell quickly and learn to talk to people. Eventually, I started joking with them, learning what one-liners didn't work, learning how I could make somebody laugh quickly. I dealt with more than my fair share of unhappy, complaining customers, and I quickly learned how to deal with a variety of people this way.

I guess my point is that you'll never get used to being social and being in the workplace until you've slogged your way through it for a few weeks. People can be cruel, horrible, and unhelpful to a socially awkward person, but you can only gain experience from dealing with it.

Edit: I call them mouth breathers because of the way they stare up at the menu when they can't decide which of the four choices to take. Blank, empty eyes, mouth agape... it's very flattering.
 
20 years old isn't a time to lose momentum in the growing up process, it's crucial to take the next step after high school. A year of delaying whatever comes next is enough.......if you're not ready to know what's right for you to do long term, then do something useful in the short term......I'd suggest community college 'cause it's easy to get into, the cost isn't that much and regardless of which courses you enroll in to start off, there are a multitude of choices and resources to inspire you.......a lot more than you get from movies and TV.

The "fat and ugly" thing is trickier......at the end of the day how you play the cards you get dealt in life is way more meaningful than the cards themselves. And the "I'm not good with people" thing is something you can learn to change and if you don't, you're going to regret it a lot later on.

20 years old is a good age so do not waste it.
 
constant stranger said:
20 years old is a good age so do not waste it.

Just playing devils advocate... at some point in your life you won't have any choice to stay home and relax. So if you have the opportunity at 20... that can be a good thing. Soon enough you will be on the work train to heck.

That being said, I agree you are in your comfort zone. I went to school and I was living at home and I had like 2 classes a day. I realized I was getting agoraphobic and filled with anxiety. Most of my week was sitting at home watching tv or studying and by the end my comfort zone had shrunk so far it was a major pain to get out.  I might recommend a starter part time job.  Or devote one day a week to leaving the house and not coming back until 5 PM. Do you laundry, purchase your groceries, learn to iron, make your meals. Don't let yourself slide.

One very funny take on this was in the movie "Mr. Mom" where Michael Keaton got laid off and soon was in his bathroom all day obsessed with soaps. That is what the comfort zone can do.
 

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