Do you believe in friendships between men and women?

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roy1986

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I mean real friendship, not the hang out with the gang kind of friendship.

My therapist told me that I should try a different approach and agree to befriend with a woman, but I've never believed you can
develop a decent relationship with the opposite sex, as a man, I don't see myself able to get so close to a woman without
falling for her. 

I have never understood men who agree to this, I mean you sit there listen to what kind of dicks the guys around her are 
and you are like her **** free therapist, who would want such a thing.
Maybe I'm exaggerating, what's your point of you on the matter?
 
I do. I don't believe in the notion that men and ladies can't be actual, true friends. I watched this video about it before, and the girl in the video said that she thought the only reason why men and women were friends was because they couldn't figure out a way to be together. I don't believe in that. I think the notion itself is ridiculous. I don't see how being male or female determines friendship. I've had male friends for years now and nothing, not a thing, has ever come up on either end. So it's definitely possible.
 
I do as well. Conversations between male and female friends are not necessarily about the dating options of one of the two, either. I have guys that I am friends with who are married even, and it's not like we want to be "together," we just enjoy each other's company.
 
I have a lot of female friends, never had a problem with it. Just because they are the opposite sex doesn't mean there has to be an attraction. Your erogenous zones shouldn't be a condition in begin friends with someone. It never bothered me to hear about their guy problems, and one is a lesbian so with her there are never guy problems.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I have always had mostly guy friends.  I would tell you why, but I'm sure I'd get yelled at for it...even if it's true.  lol

Pls tell.  :D

I have a couple of completely platonic woman friends. Though... more often than not it doesn't work out that way. The women I am platonic friends with are nowhere near as close as my close guy friends though. I'm not sure how close you would be able to get without having any feelings from one side or the other. It can happen though I guess.
 
I think it depends on the person. It's difficult to "just be friends" with someone you're attracted to (for some people).
 
I agree with Eve- I think it depends on the persons involved. I know my sister has several male friends, her best friend aside from her husband being male, and she would obviously say men and women can be friends. As for me, I've strayed away from male friends and I just don't think they could work. Feelings would surely arise if we got close enough to be true friends, or otherwise we would just be casual distant friends which would never amount to the type of closer intimate friendships I could receive from other women.

I also know some people who get on with their lives perfectly fine when they're attracted to their friends, while others (me) can't keep up the friendship if there's an attraction. That, in turn, I think depends on what the relationship is and what it means to that person.

Edit: Also real quick- the friendship you describe where the girl just complains about men and uses you as a therapist isn't always the case. Some women can be like that, but we're all individuals. You simply need to find a girl you can relate with and who shares your interests and views on life.
 
Tijopi said:
I agree with Eve- I think it depends on the persons involved. I know my sister has several male friends, her best friend aside from her husband being male, and she would obviously say men and women can be friends. As for me, I've strayed away from male friends and I just don't think they could work. Feelings would surely arise if we got close enough to be true friends, or otherwise we would just be casual distant friends which would never amount to the type of closer intimate friendships I could receive from other women.

I also know some people who get on with their lives perfectly fine when they're attracted to their friends, while others (me) can't keep up the friendship if there's an attraction. That, in turn, I think depends on what the relationship is and what it means to that person.

Edit: Also real quick- the friendship you describe where the girl just complains about men and uses you as a therapist isn't always the case. Some women can be like that, but we're all individuals. You simply need to find a girl you can relate with and who shares your interests and views on life.

I just tend to believe that some people keep friends from the opposite sex, in order to have someone to lean on when their other half treats them badly.
I heard from some people that others have used them and completely ignored possible feeling they have toward them, which in my opinion is vicious and really shows the character of a person. 
If I honestly believed that most people are not like that, I would dive in and take the risk, especially because male friends tend to be too occupied with their own issues and barely make time for their pals, however, I don't like the thought of someone taking me for granted and in many cases it's like that for guys.
 
I have more male friends that female friends and always have done. I'm not saying that I have never fallen for a friend,it has happened but I just happen to get on better with men than women for some reason and it's purely platonic,with no romantic feelings at all.
 
Serephina said:
I have more male friends that female friends and always have done. I'm not saying that I have never fallen for a friend,it has happened but I just happen to get on better with men than women for some reason and it's purely platonic,with no romantic feelings at all.

Agree. I've had male friends (I don't usually make *close* friends with anyone, male or female) and I've always gotten along better with male coworkers.
 
Yes. Men ***** about their dating woes, too.

Piece of advice: Stay away from whoever is telling you that friendship between men and women is just you listening to her complain.
 
The majority of friendships seem to be more about convenience + easiness, and it might be that little bit more relaxed when the male/female element isn't there.

The fear of unwanted attention gets in the way, depending on whether both people are single or not. And despite the feminist rhetoric about masculinity as something stemming from other men, I find women judge social awkwardness and insecurity much more harshly, along with being generally pickier about who's in their social circle. It's just easier with men. The two or three female friends I've hard were either older or unusually easy going sorts.
 
Friendships are a two-way street. You're not just going to be listening to her and feeling like a therapist if you do care how she feels, and she'll want to do the same to you, also listening to anything that upsets you.
Maybe try to find someone who you don't feel attracted to? That could be a start, I guess.

My answer is yes.
 
If therapist says then try, but if you ask me it is not possible, sooner or later, from one, another or both sides will be something more than friendship, it is just matter of time.
 
Xpendable said:
What I don't believe in is friendship between women.

That's also possible to have. So if the only response you have is a smart ass answer, perhaps you shouldn't comment.
 
roy1986 said:
I mean real friendship, not the hang out with the gang kind of friendship.

My therapist told me that I should try a different approach and agree to befriend with a woman, but I've never believed you can
develop a decent relationship with the opposite sex, as a man, I don't see myself able to get so close to a woman without
falling for her. 

I have never understood men who agree to this, I mean you sit there listen to what kind of dicks the guys around her are 
and you are like her **** free therapist, who would want such a thing.
Maybe I'm exaggerating, what's your point of you on the matter?

Yes, I do believe that men and women can be friends. Why not
 
In real life I have no friends anymore and when I did they were all males, but online most of my friends are females because guys just don't seem to talk to me. I don't know why, it just seems that the only people really willing to talk to me are females. My best friend is a female I met on another forum, and while I do admit that I find her to be an attractive person overall I know that that's not the sort of relationship that we have and I know my boundaries. We have said that we loved one another but it's purely platonic with nothing romantic, we just have a special friendship where we can say pretty much anything to one another. There was one girl that I really developed feelings for, but I let my problems ruin that and I really regret what happened. :( But yeah there's nothing wrong with a friendship between a male and a female. I seem to get along better with females for some reason anyway, I don't know why.
 
EveWasFramed said:
I think it depends on the person. It's difficult to "just be friends" with someone you're attracted to (for some people).

This. And I believe so, yes, that men and women can be just friends if they are both able to stay mutual on that.
 

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