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lonelyinbk

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Hi I'm new here if you haven't seen my newb post yet. I just think that the point of this site should be to end loneliness and what better way to do that than by connecting with people in your area. I'm a New Yorker from Brooklyn. There doesn't seem to be too many lonely New Yorkers. At least I haven't met any. A little about myself, I'm a single black 19 year old female college student. A big part of my loneliness stems from having Body Dysmorphic Disorder. It's when you obsess over your looks and you feel really depressed about it. It can be a specific thing like your nose or something. You find yourself always looking in reflective sufaces trying to will your percieved deformity to change. Or bad looks or whatever. Any way I'm learning how to get this under control. I pushed many people away because of always obsessing about my looks. But I've met a couple of new people who I was succesful in highlighting my good atributes to and I don't think they even notice this problem I have. But I am lonely because of being this way for years and the people I do know have like 50 friends. I think I would feel more comfortable trying to build a friendship with someone else who is lonley. As we would have that in common. It would be so embarassing if my two new friend new that they were the only real friends I have. And that I don't even have a best friend. Is there anyone else who can relate to this? Its sort of a catch 22. Any way thats the end of my ramble. I hope to get some replies soon. Laters
 
Hello, Lonelyinbk, welcome to the forum. I'm not from NY but I can relate to what you're saying (catch 22)
 
Man I was right. I guess i'm the only lonely person in all of New York. I guess I should move.
 
lonelyinbk said:
Man I was right. I guess i'm the only lonely person in all of New York. I guess I should move.

Nooo, don't! I always imagine NY like this really cool town where nobody knows you and so you can do anything you like. :) And there is lot of new people to meet. And you can go and drink coffee alone. LOL.
 
Luna_luce said:
lonelyinbk said:
Man I was right. I guess i'm the only lonely person in all of New York. I guess I should move.

Nooo, don't! I always imagine NY like this really cool town where nobody knows you and so you can do anything you like. :) And there is lot of new people to meet. And you can go and drink coffee alone. LOL.

New York is sort of like that but everyone here definitely has a lot of friends. Its not like everyone knows everyone though because of the large concentration of people that’s why its so hard for me at least to connect with anyone. Because everyone has friends that they've known since high school and some times junior high. For me it’s the loneliest place in the world. No one really makes an effort to get to know you.
 
lonelyinbk said:
Luna_luce said:
lonelyinbk said:
Man I was right. I guess i'm the only lonely person in all of New York. I guess I should move.

Nooo, don't! I always imagine NY like this really cool town where nobody knows you and so you can do anything you like. :) And there is lot of new people to meet. And you can go and drink coffee alone. LOL.

New York is sort of like that but everyone here definitely has a lot of friends. Its not like everyone knows everyone though because of the large concentration of people that’s why its so hard for me at least to connect with anyone. Because everyone has friends that they've known since high school and some times junior high. For me it’s the loneliest place in the world. No one really makes an effort to get to know you.


Ok, so maybe you have to make the effort to know them! Since the city where I live is not that big, and I always have the fear of meeting someone and "he'll see I'm alone" (bullshit, I hate this stupid thought, like there's anything wrong with being alone!), so New York seems ideal for me...You can go to some bar or something and sit and have a cup of coffee and meet new people without having to be afraid of your "past" to hunt you. Have you ever tried that?

Ironically, when I go to another country, I don't have this fear and I can go out and sit alone somewhere...but in my own town, I do. Why should it be easy when it can be complicated? :D:rolleyes:
 
Luna_luce said:
lonelyinbk said:
Luna_luce said:
lonelyinbk said:
Man I was right. I guess i'm the only lonely person in all of New York. I guess I should move.

Nooo, don't! I always imagine NY like this really cool town where nobody knows you and so you can do anything you like. :) And there is lot of new people to meet. And you can go and drink coffee alone. LOL.

New York is sort of like that but everyone here definitely has a lot of friends. Its not like everyone knows everyone though because of the large concentration of people that’s why its so hard for me at least to connect with anyone. Because everyone has friends that they've known since high school and some times junior high. For me it’s the loneliest place in the world. No one really makes an effort to get to know you.


Ok, so maybe you have to make the effort to know them! Since the city where I live is not that big, and I always have the fear of meeting someone and "he'll see I'm alone" (bullshit, I hate this stupid thought, like there's anything wrong with being alone!), so New York seems ideal for me...You can go to some bar or something and sit and have a cup of coffee and meet new people without having to be afraid of your "past" to hunt you. Have you ever tried that?

Ironically, when I go to another country, I don't have this fear and I can go out and sit alone somewhere...but in my own town, I do. Why should it be easy when it can be complicated? :D:rolleyes:

Alas. I always feel much to awkward to approach people. And the only people who approach me are skeevy men in their late 30's and 40's. If you are not skeevy. Don't be offended by that.
 

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