Pondering complexities

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.

EveWasFramed

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 28, 2011
Messages
11,507
Reaction score
24
Location
Georgia, US
On occasion, I ponder at why I can't dig up any good will toward my husband's ex wife. I mean, I KNOW it's because of her extreme selfishness and manipulation, but the woman rubbed me wrong from the very beginning. On the other hand, my ex husband's fiance' (they are getting married next month) is someone I like and respect. She and I have never had a cross word and I've never held against her, any ill feelings I once had for my ex. I may never fully fathom why some people are the way they are, but while my husband's ex doesn't like me (the feeling is mutual), my ex's (almost) wife likes me just fine. 
My daughter and I sent a wedding gift and I was surprised to see the post below on Facebook. Although I knew that she and I had no issues, she IS about to marry my ex and father of my child. 
I suppose the point of my thread was just to ponder people's capacity to choose to get along with someone or not. I guess it has a lot to do with respecting boundaries. What do you guys think?


There is no reason that any body can't be decent, get along, and even be friends with anyone. I have developed a friendship with Jays wife before me and I think she's wonderful. She trusts me with her daughter and and we chat often. Today I came home to find a wedding gift from her. What a wonderful human being. Thank you, Deborah and Jaylen. 💗
 
I think it has a lot to do with how much each person wants to try.  

My ex's last girlfriend, I did not like her from the day I met her.  I can't give you any concrete reason why, it was just a feeling.  She was always jealous of me the entire time. I think she kept my ex away on purpose (he, of course, let her, so it's just as much his fault).  I don't think she wanted my kids around and she definitely didn't want my ex having anything to do with me.
This new girlfriend actually seems decent, though.  She apparently knows the whole situation and is fine with it.  She talks to me, she says hello when she sees me, she doesn't just sit in the car shooting me dirty looks, she likes tries, whereas the last one didn't do anything unless it would benefit her.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I think it has a lot to do with how much each person wants to try.  

My ex's last girlfriend, I did not like her from the day I met her.  I can't give you any concrete reason why, it was just a feeling.  She was always jealous of me the entire time. I think she kept my ex away on purpose (he, of course, let her, so it's just as much his fault).  I don't think she wanted my kids around and she definitely didn't want my ex having anything to do with me.
This new girlfriend actually seems decent, though.  She apparently knows the whole situation and is fine with it.  She talks to me, she says hello when she sees me, she doesn't just sit in the car shooting me dirty looks, she likes tries, whereas the last one didn't do anything unless it would benefit her.

Makes sense. My husband's ex isn't interested in anyone/anything that doesn't benefit her. 
Also, I've always taught Jaylen to be kind to her future stepmother. Having been one a couple of times, I know that simple kindness goes a long way in fostering mutual respect.
 
I feel sorry for all my ex's boyfriends. I always want to stage an intervention when I hear she "found a new man" and save the poor lad. But she eventually reveals herself and most of them make it out alive. :D
 
bleed_the_freak said:
I feel sorry for all my ex's boyfriends. I always want to stage an intervention when I hear she "found a new man" and save the poor lad. But she eventually reveals herself and most of them make it out alive. :D

LOL... I had a good chuckle at that.  :p
 

Latest posts

Back
Top