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Going to be gone for a while...
So, so heartbreaking... Sad
Life is so cruel bro hang in there and dont wish yourself being in jail this is not we deserve, having a job is a must or else will make situation more worst than it is, i barely make much money working but it lets live a life without job its hard bro please hang in there
Holy shit I feel for you. A child rapist does not get rights. Go to the papers! Call the ACLU! You sound like the only decent human in your daughter's life. Please don't do anything to take you away from her.
My god, Richard, I just read through this thread... it sounds like you're letting your higher intellect keep you from doing what I know the darker parts of your soul want you to do. I don't know how well I could handle such a situation, but I'd like to think that I would handle it with the dignity and class that you've been portraying in this thread.

The laws surrounding all of this are pretty backwards in a lot of ways, so I hope everything works out for the best. Just be glad that your little girl has such a strong role model such as yourself to help her through all of this. I don't like to use this word because people attach a lot of their own meanings to it, but she is blessed in that regard.
This above all: to thine ownself be true.
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Sometimes the things that may or may not be true are the things a person needs to believe in the most. That people are basically good; honor, courage, and virtue mean everything; money and power mean nothing; that good always triumphs over evil. You remember that. Doesn't matter if it's true or not. A man should believe in those things, because those are the things worth believing in.

Any news?

I'm so sorry, I had no idea, I hadn't seen this thread until now. I wish that I could offer some kind of help other than a listening ear and my sympathy; I work in a law office, but am not familiar with Canadian law; it is horrifying to think that they would allow a child rapist to have some kind of right over the child, and the fact that the relatives are trying to make that happen only makes it worse. The complete horror. I'm so sorry.
Well quick update, im not dead. Might return more often, supposedto start working again soon. Been a long three months. Lost some weight, some muscle, some faith in humanity, but I'm getting better. Ill update yall around firt week of december.
Good to hear you're still kicking. Still rooting for you
Well, alright, here I am. Where to begin...
It's funny. Sitting at my old desk at a place I didn't expect to still be sitting at. Hell, I didn't even expect to be anywhere else than locked in a jail cell.
Well first things first; my oldest daughter had the baby on September the 5th, by Cesarienne. It was not easy, it was not pleasant. They had to knock her out because she couldn't bear the pain of it all. She's not a kid who's ever much "explored" her sexuality, as such, even the gynecological exam was too much pain for her to endure. So they knocked her out, even though there was risk involved. The doctors did a wonderful job, our doctor was an expert in teenage pregnancies. We stayed a while, maybe one or two weeks. I tried logging back in maybe 1 month ago but couldn't remember my password. I was probably too drunk at the time.

Because that happened. I hit the bottom of the barrel. I had to call a help hotline. Not because I was suicidal, although the thought did cross my mind, but because I was gearing up for murder. I almost did. A cop friend of mine, a dude I went to high school with whom I met by complete chance (or maybe not, I think someone called the cops about a stalker, because I was stalking the dude's home) talked me down. That's the thing I'm having the most trouble with. That's the thing I'll have to fight for the next 60+ years. I really, REALLY want to murder their entire family. Unlike a lot of people, I also wouldn't be scared or hesitate to do it. But I promised my kids and I really don't want to let them down. I don't want to see them through bars. But somedays, I stop caring abotu that. Those are the bad days.

So now I'm being seen by a social worked and a shrink, not to mention being part of a father's organisation. It helps a little bit, as much as things can be helped, but I realise now only time will solve this conundrum. At least the baby is safe with her adoptive family, even though the crazy maniac's family was trying to get custody (child services said "over our dead bodies, assholes") and they are actually suing my ex for mental cruelty because she doesn't want to let her son see the dad, which is the pedophile.........................Child Services is also having a field day with that one.
It's going to go to court around january. Since he doesn't have a criminal record and they say odd of it happening again are low, he's gonna get a lowered sentence to which he pleads guilty. I wanted him in for at least 15 years but I'm starting to think we'll be lucky to get 1....
I'm not going to accept that. I'm trusting the Justice system once, not twice. This whole experience threw me back to a time when I was a very different, very evil person. For about a month, I kind of remembered I liked it. It shamed me and disgusted me. I know it's not the way I made myself become for the last 15 years. reminded me I could still be that guy if I needed.
He and his family better pay. Or else, sooner or latter, when they least expect it, I WILL. Mark my words. 200 years ago this whole situation would have been solved in 15 minutes. I'm not above finding myself a possee and hanging him to the nearest tree.
Anyway, I'll try and avoid all that as much as I can. Keep working on trying to not be that guy again.

I'm happy to be back.
Oh yeah, I almost forgot; I'm actually considering a criminal career change instead. I wish I were joking. But I've changed in the last three months. The guy I used to be seems to creep back in at innoportune moments. I've done some bad things. Got kicked out of a bar for pumelling a guy half to death. Over him tripping on me. Can't say it was all that unpleasant either.
I know I'm not supposed to think these things and are supposed to get rid of them, which is why I'm seeing a shrink, but as time goes by and as more and more people seem determine to piss me off, murder is sounding more and more tempting. I might even start a list. Because if I do end up going to jail for murder, might as well get rid of some more scumbags along the way. As romanticized as it might seem, I even thought about going after pedo's, Punisher style. Thing is, I'm not that brilliant and don't know the people I used to know, so I don't know how to get my hands on military grade hardware, except knocking off the military base next door. And I kind of don't want to shoot people who don't got it coming, like soldiers or civilians, so that's out of the question...but yeah. It's on my mind. I wish it weren't. I wish a lot of things hadn't gone down.
Made a woman cry yesterday for it. I told her why I had been off for so long from work and when I told her, she burst in tear. She asked me to FORGIVE and move on, or else I'll shrivel up inside.
That ain't me. If this world was a just world, people who destroy children's lives would not be allowed to breath. I always found it ironic that some of the worst criminal elements of the world got that when ordinary people spew out bullshit crap like "forgive".
There's some things you can't forgive. Some things you SHOULDN'T forgive. Because forgiveness entails you're okay with those things having happened. Some things should NOT happen. Ever.
I have to sit down in about an hour for a psych evaluation with the CAVAC girls about my daughter Audrey, the youngest. That scares me. That kid scares me. I mean, I love her, but...sadly, she's like me. She's not like my oldest. My oldest is a sweet thing, rather innocent. Audrey...she has the same darkness as me inside. She tries to do good, but I've seen it more than once. She doesn't talk much, but she really wants to kill right now.
9 year olds shouldn't want to kill anyone.

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