Can loneliness be won?

Hi all. New here.

I wanted to ask this for a long time, but I just didn't find the right place on internet to ask this.

I did try really hard to beat loneliness. I post adverts for meeting on few forums from my country, on few facebook pages in my country, even my best female friend post her opinion on me. I even start YouTube channel. I really pushed soo hard. But not really with too much success. It took me 4-5-6 years just to get 5-6 close friends. And I'm happy with them at this point. I live 40 miles away from city with 1 million people, and I live in a village with 300 people. So when I go in 1M city, after therapy I spend all my time with some of that 5 friends. Like my little personal group. Problem is: I'm feeling very lonely, sad and lost last 5-6 months, especially in last few days. My depression has gone way too far .. and I just can't do it anymore. I did really try everything, but it just doesn't work. Yesterday after therapy I was sitting in park with my best female friend. And I was like 5" away from her on the bench, but I was never really that far from someone in my entire life. 5" was more like million light years away. I just can't find someone of my kind, even friends. I hate being in place where I live. People around my are just primitive, evil and bad. Other bad thing: I even hate being in crowd. I really hate to go to therapy in 1M city. I even hate to take bus to hospital. The only thing which makes me happy is train. I have like 1 and half hour to that city and I just look outside and my mind is shut down. When I walk around everywhere, first thing that comes to my mind is: "Do you even belong here?". Or when I see people on terrace drinkin' coffee with friends and have fun, I'm like: "What the h**l is wrong with you when you can't have that?".

I think you got the point.

So, my question to you is:

Can loneliness be won?

The only way you can lose to loneliness is if you give up. There is a battle against loneliness that many people fight, some people give up and accept it's their destiny to be alone forever, others continue to fight until they win.

You're the master of your own destiny and you have control over whether you win or lose to loneliness.
So yes, I believe you absolutely can win... Provided you want to.

I'm not sure of that, but ok. I did try hard. I really did. But some things just don't work.

Way I see it, there's two ways to look at it; either as a fight, or there is the other way; a companion.
I've been alone for a long time now, almost a decade. I can't say I particularly feel bad about it either. Oh, of course, some things I miss, the smooth and heart warming touch of a beautiful woman, late night conversations, just hanging about in front of a beer.
But I found other people and other ways.
Loneliness, to me, isn't really a fight as much as a companion. Someone or something to embrace. She'll walk on the road with me for a while and when I meet someone else to accompany, it'll only make it sweeter to feel.
I learn to embrace loneliness a long time ago and proof of it is, if I'm with people for too long, I tend to want to isolate myself, because it feels comfortable. So the key is to balance. Most people keep thinking on concentrating on how lonely they are, without concentrating on anything else and the fact that you're free to pursue WHATEVER your heart desires when you're by yourself. Great things ARE still possible.
But pursuing a battle, if one views it as a battle, is often done furiously and with a sense of panic that drives someone to anguish sometimes; it's a slow walk.
That's my view of it anyway. Of course, everything eventually changes; eventually, you will not feel lonly anymore because you WILL be surrounded by people who care about you and vice versa. But learn to embrace those periods, be it days, months or even years, when you have only yourself, and loneliness as a companion.
"Good things come to those who wait." It might be cliché, but it's true.

Take care, friend.

Loneliness, in my opinion, is a state of mind. You are what you think you are. I know that state of mind, as I was there for almost a decade, it took a lot of hard work to get away from it, but it was worth it. I have no more friends now than I did before, but yet, I'm perfectly fine with how things are now.

Not saying it's easy to change your state of mind, but it might be worth considering. Why aren't you satisfied with what you have? What are you looking for that you don't feel you have now? What would make you less lonely? Why don't you feel you belong?
Just some questions to ask yourself. You don't have to give me those answers if you don't want to.

Wasn't here for some time. Will answer later, g2g in a few moments. Will be back. Thanks for replies.

@ Moderators - not sure if I wanted to edit last post, or bump topic. I don't wanna people to get lost. So I decided for bump thing. Sry if it was the wrong option.

@Richard

I'm pretty much alone all my life. Really a lot of bad things happend, and I kinda don't wanna talk about it. But my life sucks overall. Specially in loneliness part.
I did read post, but at this point I don't have anything special to say. I'm really not the most talkative person in the world.
I know that we need to wait for the best things to happen', but I really don't have time and patience anymore. I'm tired of tryin' ... I just don't have passion for nothing anymore.

@Callie

Hm, pretty easy question, but still soo hard to answer.
I had problems with student life. I was on collage very short time. I lived in a student "home" with 15 000 other students ... And I was never that alone in my entire life. It was the time when I started to see my psychiatrist and I was in mess. I knew that collage sucks and that it's not the right thing for me. But I wanted to try. I was never good with people around me. I still don't know how to deal with people. I do have problems in social plan. Anyway, I left collage 'couse I just couldn't take it anymore. Being' in the city with 1 million people, where you don't belong and you NEVER will. Being alone in the crowd. Awefull feeling. Most depressed one year of my life. I was really happy when I quit collage and went back to my 300 people place.
I always dreamed about getting house where I grew up as a gift from my grandpa. He is only alive from my familly in terms of houses and land. Grandma died years ago, other grandma and grandpa also. It was my dream to get that house, so I could raise my child in that house. It would be like dream come true. Too good to be true? Probably. I always wanted also big house, work from home, have a kid - female one. I'm pretty good with female kids. I don't know how to deal with male onces. Big garten. Place with bench and desk outside to drink coffee in the morning, ... U get the point.
But the problem is: I'm diagnosed with one stupid thing in my healt stuff, and 93% of people with my diagnose get cancer at the age of 45 max. So my healt record isn't that great. I do have problems with physical and mental health both. I'm still not sure if I'm gonna make it in terms of cancer.
Sometimes I do want to get cancer, just so I don't have problems anymore. I started to have nightmares and about 4 months ago I saw myself dyin' in a dream. I saw my death. I had 2 simular dreams after it, on same topic.
I don't know really. I loose interest really fast. Even stuff like youtube, playin' music, girls and other stuff which made me really happy about half year ago, today are worthless. My far family (not close one) called me to go on the seaside next week, and I'm kinda sick when I hear some things. I just wanna sleep without anyone around me.
Collage thing is another funny thing: I got offered a really ok job, amazing payment, 6000$ monthly after graduating, my only job is to graduate and take job after it. I refused it, 'couse collage made me miserable. Pretty foolish of me. A lot of people would take that without asking.
I think I made my point. If U have questions, feel free to write.