I've met a guy from Romania 8 months ago on Fb. We were friends in the beginning then it went deeper and we ended up together for like 5 months. He came to see me in the first 4 months and we spend one the beautiful 6 days together. He was in love with me, he was kind, we had a lot of in common, we spent hours talking enjoying each other's company, we talked about anything and everything to each other, during my worst days I found him there standing by me giving me strength . We were in a long distance relationship but it didn't matter, we missed each other yes but we were so involved in each other's life that it wasn't a problem that distance thing. One problem was he had some bad sides of his personality that I couldn't bare anymore and I found myself in the end more hurt, sad and 0 happiness. He was so possessive towards me, I had to tell him every small details in my day, knowing that I'm the kind of person that likes space sometimes, I had to wait for him everyday until 3 am so he get home from work and talk to him, everytime I go out with friends he gets upset and jealous, I wanted it all slow but him not, he wanted to travel with me to Spain and I wasn't ready to do that with him, I wanted to but my university schedule didn't allow me to so he got again mad and pressured me to do it with him. I loved him so much , I was patient with him for a long time and hoped for him to get rid of this tendency to overpossession but in the end I didn't feel alrightanymore. I was so miserable be no matter hard I try to make him happy and satisfied, it was never enough for him. We broke up, he was a wonderful human being but had a bad dark side. Sometimes he made me feel like a thing .I feel hurt, disappointed on him, I sometimes wonder if I rushed it and ended it or if it was the right decision. I miss the good him, I really do. I loved him so much and he sure did but I don't really know what to think anymore. I feel pain,I feel a deep whole inside of me. Help me please. !!
Breakup, was it the right thing to do ?
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Ignis
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You said it yourself.
You were MISERABLE and you left him because you didn't want to feel that way anymore. You may be feeling regret over such a thing but if you jump back into this relationship the exact same thing will happen again and you'll feel the same way. It's up to HIM to change in the relationship, not you and I wouldn't even consider going back until he's made a concerted effort to change.
I think you definitely made the right choice leaving, sounds like a toxic relationship that would have gotten more difficult to leave the longer it went on.
Dinaa said:
Dinaa said:
You were MISERABLE and you left him because you didn't want to feel that way anymore. You may be feeling regret over such a thing but if you jump back into this relationship the exact same thing will happen again and you'll feel the same way. It's up to HIM to change in the relationship, not you and I wouldn't even consider going back until he's made a concerted effort to change.
I think you definitely made the right choice leaving, sounds like a toxic relationship that would have gotten more difficult to leave the longer it went on.
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It might hurt, but if it's bad for you, it's bad for you.
Think of it this way; what would have it looked like, 20 years from now? Let's say you had married and stayed, would his bad personality have taken a turn for the worse? Would you be confined to your home because of his jealousy? Would he have become violent?
I think you did the right thing. Everyone has a dark side, sometimes it comes out, it happens. But when it becomes restrictive towards others...that becomes unhealthy.
Think of it this way; what would have it looked like, 20 years from now? Let's say you had married and stayed, would his bad personality have taken a turn for the worse? Would you be confined to your home because of his jealousy? Would he have become violent?
I think you did the right thing. Everyone has a dark side, sometimes it comes out, it happens. But when it becomes restrictive towards others...that becomes unhealthy.
Thank you guys
You can't imagine how it hurts, it hurts so badly. Sometimes I can't stand the pain and feel like what I've done was wrong. It was the right thing to do anyway, as you said, it would have ended at one point or another. Maybe it would have ended with bigger damages than now , who knows.
You can't imagine how it hurts, it hurts so badly. Sometimes I can't stand the pain and feel like what I've done was wrong. It was the right thing to do anyway, as you said, it would have ended at one point or another. Maybe it would have ended with bigger damages than now , who knows.
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pinocio
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I totally agree with thisIgnis said:
, maybe you are feeling bad and sad but what can you do when he get worst ?if he change for you then it'll be good for you.if he won't then you did it right.
I went through a very similar scenario. I made my desicion the day I walked to mothers house watching the trees on the way there, when hit by the thought "I will never be happy again unless I leave that person". After that, it still hurt, but not equally much. The desicion was made, and the desicion was final. What hurt was the hours of yelling that one could have, trying to prove things, trying to help, every proof being completely forgotten the next yelling session.
It does get better with time. Other thoughts will appear, such as "Will I ever find someone I won't find errors with, even if there were real errors?" or "Any sound is better than this silence, except for that yelling". Normally, people don't get better with time - they get worse. I think you may have chosen the right thing. Now to be strong, engure and work your way up. Best of luck!
(Sorry for being late to comment section X) )
It does get better with time. Other thoughts will appear, such as "Will I ever find someone I won't find errors with, even if there were real errors?" or "Any sound is better than this silence, except for that yelling". Normally, people don't get better with time - they get worse. I think you may have chosen the right thing. Now to be strong, engure and work your way up. Best of luck!
(Sorry for being late to comment section X) )
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