Dream girl as workout aid?

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Osiris

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This question is quite an interesting one because there's many parts to this question. But I'll start by explaining.

Imagine a girl you'd consider a 10, infact try and imagine an 11. A girl more beautiful than any you've ever met. Let's say she plays Tennis as excersise and a hobby. My first question is it morally wrong to practice tennis just so you can challenge her to a match? I mean surely if you dated or became good friends it's still a funny story, no?

Second question, is it wrong to use her as an exercise goal? As in "when I've got a six pack I'll try and ask her out"?

Third question, I feel I know the answer but I'd love to hear peoples thoughts. Is it wrong of me to assume because she's so beautiful, she'd be shallow? I mean surely if she could have any man, why would she go for the chubby guy  with no car?

If anyone feels like trying to answer my questions, I'd really appreciate it! Thank you for reading!
 
Honestly, I think that there's no point in putting her on a pedestal based on her looks and to spend the next several weeks, months working towards trying to win her over. It sounds like you know nothing about her. She will either like you or not. Just ask her out.

It is also interesting to think that you would consider her shallow for not wanting a chubby guy with no car. Do you want a chubby girl with no car?
 
I agree with Outcast. You are basing everything off of how someone looks when you know nothing about her. And just because someone looks good doesn't mean they are shallow. That's kind of shallow of YOU to think so.

Ask her out or don't ask her out, but definitely don't put her on some kind of pedestal.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I agree with Outcast.  You are basing everything off of how someone looks when you know nothing about her.  And just because someone looks good doesn't mean they are shallow.  That's kind of shallow of YOU to think so.  

Ask her out or don't ask her out, but definitely don't put her on some kind of pedestal.

That's the thing, I don't think I'd ever ask her out. I just use her as a "Goalpost" for the type of girl I want in the future.

I do know quite a bit about her but we haven't talked properly in years.

I know it's shallow of me to assume she's shallow too lol! But as I said, if you had your pick of the men seriously there's no chance I'd get the pick. Again sounding shallow but I guess she'd pick a confident guy with a 6 pack or something along those lines.

It's hard not to put a basically perfect girl on a pedestal, don't get me wrong it's been a long time since we last spoke she might be a horrible ***** now....but thanks to Facebook (Errggh) I know for a fact she's an amazing person on the inside as well. I mean she wants to be a doctor!

So what I'm saying is she's too perfect for me at the moment in my opinion, in the future that might change. But I doubt it...
 
I've picked less good looking guys over super hot guys. Looks might get you in the door for some people, but if there's nothing behind the looks, or even worse arrogance, why bother?
 
1. If you've already got an interest in tennis, then I don't suppose there's any harm in it, but if she is your only motivation then it seems to like an awful lot of work to put into something when all you know about this girl is that she looks good.

2. I use things as exercise motivation all the time, I don't see a problem with that, but if you're just trying to change everything about yourself, so that you can ask her out... that seems pointless and slightly disingenuous.

3. Whether or not she's shallow has nothing to do with how she looks - there are plenty of shallow people that are not traditionally attractive. My wife was very attractive and she chose the chubby loser with no job, no car and no life. I guess she appreciated other things about me. Good looks are like the wrapping on a present - it may get you interested, but if there's nothing of interest inside the box, then who cares?

In short, stop trying to change yourself to appeal to this one woman and consider striking up a conversation. She will either like you - warts and all - or she won't. Either way, it will not be the end of the world.
 
Well, personally, I think if she's your "objective", that's bad. You exercise for yourself, not to get hot girls, although getting hot girls might be a part of your objective, once you keep said hot girl if she IS shallow, you're going to lose your motivation to work out and keep said hot girl lol.
Although I say that, but I have trouble relating. A girl rating a 20 might acost me at the gym and I wouldn't even see her or give her the time of day. Not out of meaness, mind you, I'm just busy and not there for that LOL. I go to the gym (er, I USED to go to the gym, trying to find the money to start again) for myself and to improve myself and hopefully live a pain-free comfortable life when I'm 90, not for girls. But it can be a part of your motivation to look good enough to be noticed. Also could be a part of your motivation to work out with her, that's an acceptable goal.

As for shallowness, never assume one is shallow because of looks. A rating 25 girl might only go for chubby guys with no cars. It's individual and based on a number of factors which include personality, education, experiences, etc. My cousin is rather on the thin side, tall and lanky, yet dated a girl who was a pro-wrestler and surrounded by 6'5 300 pound muscle-bound men. They're married and have 2 kids now lol.
You never know until you try.
 
Osiris said:
My first question is it morally wrong to practice tennis just so you can challenge her to a match? I mean surely if you dated or became good friends it's still a funny story, no?
I think it depends on how you go about it. If you're picking it up purely because you wanna talk to her, even if you have the sport itself... I think that's a problem, on the other hand, if you don't mind playing Tennis or you've thought about trying it, it's another avenue for getting the opportunity to talk to her if you're too nervous about starting up cold conversation, also gives you the chance to bond with one another and gives you a common ground to talk about.
However, if you start practicing and you don't like it but continue on just to talk to her... I wouldn't say "morally wrong" but I'd probably facepalm about why you're doing something you dislike when you could just talk to her in the first place.

Osiris said:
Second question, is it wrong to use her as an exercise goal? As in "when I've got a six pack I'll try and ask her out"?

In my eyes, whatever gets you taking care of yourself is a pretty good thing. The problem that arises here however, is if things go south or you move on... You've lost your reason to exercise which is bad. I think that's as good a reason as any to get started on getting into shape, as long as you transition that into wanting to look more attractive to the opposite sex, or for your health, or whatever.
I don't think people can really be criticised for excercising, regardless of their reasoning. Everyone has a different carrot and stick, what motivates you won't be the same as what motivates others and while others may perceive you as "Sleazy" or "Shallow", I say good for you. As long as you're in shape and happy, you do you.

Osiris said:
Third question, I feel I know the answer but I'd love to hear peoples thoughts. Is it wrong of me to assume because she's so beautiful, she'd be shallow? I mean surely if she could have any man, why would she go for the chubby guy  with no car?

Honestly...? A little. You shouldn't be judging how she would act based off her looks, especially if you don't know anything about her.
I understand the sentiment though, it's probably a lack of self-esteem and self-depreciation that's rearing it's ugly head here. If you don't talk to her and communicate with her, then you'll never know if she's "Shallow because she's so beautiful" or the complete opposite... It's best that you put those thoughts out of your head, they're only going to hurt you in the long run and it will also be the thing that prevents you from talking to that cute girl you've always had a crush on, because you'll be defeating yourself, shooting yourself down because you assume she would... Even though she may very well say yes.
 
I guess being healthy for the wrong reasons is better than staying unhealthy. Whatever works man.

Hopefully once you start getting more in shape youll find some other motivation.
 
I don't want to say too much because I don't know what works. But my guess is that the most important thing a guy can have is social skills, and having something to connect with her about.


Cavey said:
My wife was very attractive and she chose the chubby loser with no job, no car and no life. I guess she appreciated other things about me.

I have to ask, how did you pull that off?
 
Definitely feel like I wandered into the shallow end here.

So I will not try to answer any of the questions and simply say that whoever made these numbers up didn't spend enough time considering all the wonderful assets a woman, or man, can bring to the table.

Personality, health, intelligence, honesty, I could go on but I don't know who to feel sorry for...the ladies being cast out for not meeting some arbitrary number, or the ladies who meet that number and only then face the consideration of other factors.

Actually, come to think of it, I think all the females from each category who have avoided being approached in this case...are the winners.

If this seems harsh is it simply a reflection of how far away from healthy human interactions that I think the OP has traveled.
 

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