Better alone or not?

Hello everyone,

I have question that bother me and hopefully I can find some good thoughts in this forum.

I depict myself as a loner, so as one that prefer stay alone than hang-out with others. So here is the problem. There are some people that I really appreciate, and there is a side of me that want to stay in contact with these people, however most of the time I prefere stay by myself.

There is a species of conflict of interest, and I don't know if I should force myself to go out with this people, so I can't loose contact, or otherwise stay real with myself even if in this way I'll gradually cut the ties with mostly everyone.

Is there someone that lives this contrast? 

Ps: hope my english is understandable..

Guess said:

Hello everyone,

I have question that bother me and hopefully I can find some good thoughts in this forum.

I depict myself as a loner, so as one that prefer stay alone than hang-out with others. So here is the problem. There are some people that I really appreciate, and there is a side of me that want to stay in contact with these people, however most of the time I prefere stay by myself.

There is a species of conflict of interest, and I don't know if I should force myself to go out with this people, so I can't loose contact, or otherwise stay real with myself even if in this way I'll gradually cut the ties with mostly everyone.

Is there someone that lives this contrast? 

Ps: hope my english is understandable..

Click to expand...

I feel the same a lot. I suggest you make yourself go out with them here and there to maintain a relationship. One day you may not prefer to be alone and have regrets. Its better to not have the regrets and its better to open up and explain to them why you can't hang out often and reveal as much of your struggle with hanging out as you are comfortable.

It's a duality everyone has to live with I think, including those who don't consider themselves loners.
I believe the trick to life is maintaining balance between the two. Being alone is important, vital even, but so is human contact.
So do take care to entertain the relationship, while not forgetting some time for yourself.

So, as you put it, looks like that socializing is more a necessities than a pleasure (assumed that can be both of them). It's similar to a sport activities, that require sacrifice and resolution, but that give back wellness both for the physics than the mind.

I also came up with this view, but in this case, isn't a problem for you to call someone just because you need it for keep your balance? Cos to me feel somehow egoistic, and I can't easily do that. It feels similar to those people who buy an animal just cos they are bored, or cos they are alone, or whatever, and keep it in a cage or in a apartament... I love animals but I think It's brutal to use them like a toy.

So, Do you force yourself to hang-out with people even if you really don't want to?