Question: What would you do?

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MissLonely79

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Please, very honest answers only:


Ok, say you are looking to buy a new house. You have a few that you have been approved for. However, you set your sights on a house that immedately steals your heart. You want this house. You NEED this house. This is the house that you want for you and your children. 

But.....

You're informed that your would be very next door neighbor's have 3 big dogs and one of them is viscious which could make the other 2 viscious. A neighbor warned you about them a month before you even buy the house. One of the neighbors literally tells you "I am 6'5, 295 pounds and I AM scared of those dogs". There are also other neighbor's who had stories about those dogs as well and they told you this. They told you animal control was called before and they did nothing so chances are, they will also do nothing when you call them. Now, you know you have children, 3 very young children and two dogs. No fence for your house or the neighbor who has the dogs house. Your yards are connected. 


Now, with all of this mind remember what the question was. This is the house of your dreams. You really want this house. You think the house is perfect for you, your wife/husband and your children.  Would you buy the house? To answer your question, I personally would not. I could not buy a house next to 3 viscious dogs. I just couldn't. I would always be scared for me and my children. Even if I could afford a fence, I still couldn't buy the house.  That would be a deal breaker for me. That's my personal opinion.

What's yours? There are no right or wrong answers.
 
For my dream house?  Yeah, I probably would.  I'd also make sure I had a gun to protect my family from said dogs and wouldn't hesitate to protect them if I had to.

Maybe put up an electric fence.  :D
 
A gun wouldn't be any consolation unless you were able to miraculously shoot the dog before he ripped out your child's throat.

Just saying.

Kind of like calling the police to help you when your house is being broken into. They will get there in time to conduct a CSI examination. That's about it.

I wouldn't buy the house unless I could afford to fence it in securely. A dream home would be a nightmare home if it's where your kid got ripped in half.
 
I would not buy the house. My dream house is not worth the risk to my children.

We had a similar situation in our neighborhood (prior to us moving in there). One day the two dogs got loose and our neighbor could not get out of her car. She called animal control and they came and took the dogs back to the owner (no idea if there was a fine or anything.) However, during the discussion, because our neighbor does own firearms, animal control told her that if she feels threatened by the dogs that she can put them down if they get loose again. The dogs have not gotten loose since then....

But as Bleed said, if you aren't there and ready, the dogs would maim and possibly kill your children before you could do anything.
 
Well, to be fair, I suppose my situation is a little different, since my kids don't play in our yard very often. We usually go to parks and whatnot. Also, my dream house wouldn't be in town or have close neighbors.

Then you also have dogs of my own....and if my kids were to play outside when vicious dogs were around, I would most definitely be ready and waiting. I would warn the neighbor too. I would do what I had to do to protect my child and get my dream house.
Also, I would be nagging whoever I had to to get those dogs taken away. Sorry, that may sound mean or inhumane, but dogs generally aren't naturally vicious unless the owners teach them to be. Said owners shouldn't have the dogs, if that's the case. It's one thing to have guard dogs, it's quite another to have dogs that would attack anything that moves, whether threatening or not.
 
TheRealCallie said:
Well, to be fair, I suppose my situation is a little different, since my kids don't play in our yard very often.  We usually go to parks and whatnot.  Also, my dream house wouldn't be in town or have close neighbors.  

Then you  also have dogs of my own....and if my kids were to play outside when vicious dogs were around, I would most definitely be ready and waiting.  I would warn the neighbor too.  I would do what I had to do to protect my child and get my dream house.  
Also, I would be nagging whoever I had to to get those dogs taken away. Sorry, that may sound mean or inhumane, but dogs generally aren't naturally vicious unless the owners teach them to be.  Said owners shouldn't have the dogs, if that's the case.  It's one thing to have guard dogs, it's quite another to have dogs that would attack anything that moves, whether threatening or not.

Good points. While some day I would like to have a house in the country, all the houses I have owned thus far have been in town/suburbs with neighbors, some so close you could pass the grey poupon through the windows.

There are a lot of assumptions on our part. I always played outside growing up and my daughter does the same. She plays in the backyard or drive way, drawing with sidewalk chalk or skating or riding her bike. 

Clearly there are options that can be taken and yes, I agree with Callie in trying to get the dogs taken away. There shouldn't be violent dogs in a housing area with close neighbors.
 
There shouldn't be violent dogs capable of getting off their own property EVER in the city or the country.

I've been chased by vicious farm dogs out on back roads before when I was a frequent bicyclist.

The owners just figured, hey it's just a country road, there is no one out here. We can let our dogs run free.

Uh no. There are walkers and bicyclists.

I'd shoot the *******.

The problem is a dog attack happens in seconds.

It hops the fence. Or a garage door opens and it sprints over. Or it burst through an unattended screen door and comes on a bee line for your kid.

The chances of being able to intercept a dog sprinting toward your child, especially with a bullet??? aren't very good.

Would you be shooting in the direction of your child? And from how far away? Let's be realistic here.
 
Um, no. I would be between the dogs and my children. Those dogs wouldn't get past me. Also, my child are a bit older and they know what to do concerning wild/dangerous animals. I know what animals are capable of. I also know what humans are capable of...especially humans protecting their family.
 
I would probably do some research about what can be done about the dogs and investigate how bad the situation actually is and whether there was any truth in it,because so far it's hearsay and maybe hang around the area talk to other people see if I can get any more information about the dogs. If it really is as bad and there is nothing that can be done,I wouldn't buy it.
 
Thanks for all of your opinions.

Serephina, it was/is true. I should have stated for certain that it was a fact. I apologize for that. Also numerous neighbors have tried to call animal control and hoa, so I knew there was little to no hope anything could be done. I also know that my brother and sister in law don't stay on top of those certain things.


Well in case you all were wondering why I asked, it is because my brother bought a house knowing full well of the scenario with the would be neighbor's dogs. I begged him not to buy the house, and I was finally told to mind my own effin business. He bought the house a month later. That was 5 months ago.

Well a few days ago, my 8 year old nephew was attacked by said dog. He was bit right on the head. It was devestating. He was in my care just 5 hours before hand. Still in the pajama's that I put him in.

I was furious. I told him and his wife not to do this, not to buy the house not only for the safety of the kids and their dogs, but my safety as well. I babysit them from time to time and EVERYONE knows, including my brother most of all, I am deafly afraid of big dogs that I do not know. As usual, I get the "who the f*** are you, go f*** yourself" speech because they do not respect me in the least. I even tried to get animal control to help (I know some people who work there) and was promptly told by my sis in law to mind my own **** business.

So needless to say, after my nephew was attack, we had a huge falling out. My dad always sticks up from my brother and this is their defense "oh so you didn't want us to buy a house because of the neighbors dogs??? Are you stupid???"

That's why I came on here to ask because I thought I was goin crazy.
 
It sounds like your brother and sister-in-law are disrespectful, dismissive, and even hostile toward you.

I can only speak for myself.

Buuuuuuuuuut, I'd be just about done with that relationship.
 
Callie, yes, he is ok, he's in pain, he has staples in his head, but he's gonna be alright.

Bleedthefreak, you really have no idea. Every word you wrote is exactly why I am done with them. If you seen what they have done and said to me over the last 8 years, you'd probably throw your hands up and say I'd probably deserved it for putting up with it so long because any normal person would have been done with them years before that.

Here's the thing, they have money. They didn't have to get that house. Another reason why I am done with them is because when sister in law told me she was putting their dogs, the dogs I love, in the garage to live, I was devestated. That's when it became done with me, finally. I'm sure they didn't know at the time that was the line I was drawing in the sand, that they thought they could still do whatever they wanted and have no consequences for their actions, but little did they know, that was the finally straw for me. I went into a severe depression because the dogs were in a very hot garage all summer. When they lost me as a babysitter and saw that I wasn't backing down, they lied to me and told me the dogs moved back in the house. That's why I was there babysitting the night before my nephew was attacked. When I did an inspection of the garage, it was very obvious that the dogs were still living in the garage. The food and water bowls and the cage was still in there. They actually think I am that stupid, that I wouldn't notice that their dogs were still living the garage and that is my fault for them thinking I was that stupid because for years I let them get away with so much. Anyway, I digress.

Here is the kicker, my oldest nephew who is now 12, was mauled by a dog when he was two years old. The dog ripped open his little neck. He almost lost his life. You would think they learned their lesson the first time. That's why I was so startled when my brother told me he bought the house. I was in disbelief. Up until the point, no matter how big of an a**hole he was, and believe me, he is a major one, to everybody, I always thought he was a great father. I knew he really loved his kids. I never doubted it for a second. Not for a second because he is a great dad. However, when he bought the house, knowing what was next door, and the history with his oldest son, was the first time I ever doubted his fatherness. I couldn't comprehend why he would do that. And with all the money he has, he was able to put up a fence but refused to saying it wasn't neccessary. Me doubting his fatherness is a new feeling for me because I never had this feeling about him and don't know how to handle. My brother is full of toxicness, attention seeking, drama, anger and most of all, selfishness and his "wife" (really his girlfriend of 9 years) is the same. He is literally one of the most selfish people you will ever meet in your life and he admits it. Did he become so selfish that he wanted that house, even at the expense of safety for his kids? I never in a million years would have thought that about him, but with all the facts, he has put doubt in mind that was never there before and I don't like it.

Anyway, I seperated myself from them months ago and the only reason why i came back is because the kids kept calling me. I'm sure they knew their kids were calling me and the only reason they allowed it is because they were out of babysitters. If it wasn't for me being able to babysit sometimes, they would have no use for me.

Anyway, the last message he sent me was "you're lucky I don't get my wife to slap the sh*t out of you".

So they are going away this weekend out of town, and guess where their dogs are going to be the entire time? In the garage. I love those dogs so much. I called animal control on them and of course our animal control ain't worth a sh*t. They said as long as they have water and food, there was nothing else they can do.


This is how sick this situation is. A month before they bought the house (the house was on the market for a long time), they told me about the dogs next door to the new house. How the neighbors warned him about the dogs and told him if he was gonna buy a house, build a fence. The other neighbor said " I am 6'5 and 290 pounds and I am scared of those dogs. I put up a fence for those dogs alone." When my brother bought the house, my cousin did the floor work and one day my cousin and his co worker were sitting outside and the dog from next door came out and tried to attack them. They had to use their chairs as protection from the dogs. How how much more of a warning do you need? How can you let your kids play out there by themselves? Now, with my brother and his wife knowing how terrified I am of big dogs that I don't know and especially if they are known to be viscious, what the hell did they think I was gonna say? Oh yeah, buy the house! Go for it! Anyway, I told them repeatedly, do not buy the house. And at one point, it looked like they weren't going to buy it, but it did a change, and they bought it.


I added more to my last post.
 
My recommendation is that you sever the tie.

It's his kids, his wife, his house, his dogs, his bad decisions, his way or the highway.

I'd be done.

If they in any way value your role as an aunt to their kids, they will bring them to visit you periodically.

If not, that's his decision.

I would not continue to subject myself to verbal and emotional abuse in order to maintain an active role in the lives of my nieces/nephews.

I would come first in that equation.
 
Do you live in America? I find it hard to believe that after multiple attacks, they haven't put those dogs down. One attack from an otherwise not vicious dog here and they kill the dog.

As for the relationship with your brother. I would tell him that you have no problem babysitting the kids, but make it on YOUR terms. At YOUR house, under YOUR circumstances. Those kids didn't ask for any of this and punishing them because your brother is being a dick isn't really fair. I know a bit about brothers being dicks, only he cut me completely out of my niece and nephews lives without any regard of anyone but himself, but that's an entirely different story. So yeah, continue seeing and talking to the kids, but make it clear to your brother what your boundaries are.
 
They never bit anyone before. This is their first bite. But they have jumped on other people and knocked them down. They are pretty scary because they run up to you in angry way and bark. After the dog bit my nephew, the cops came, took a report, told my brother they were gonna arrest him because he threatened the owners with his gun. Then they didn't and they just left after they spoke with the owners. Animal control then came and gave the owners a few days to "rectify the situation". I volunteer in dog rescue so this doesn't surprise me a bit, especially since we live down south where there are minimal animal laws. My brother also just hired a lawyer to sue them and the HOA.

I know it's not the kids fault. I love them dearly like my own children and they are the reasons why I put up with my brother and sister in laws crap for a very long time. However, placing myself in abusive situations (you just don't know) just for the kids, I couldn't do it anymore. I did it for 8 years. Forcing me to watch animal cruelty with their own dogs, I just couldn't do it anymore. You have no idea how much sh*t i've had to eat just to see the kids but this was the final straw. It is up to them now. If they want their kids to have a relationship with their only family member other than my dad in a 500 mile radius, they have to change. I can no longer carry the weight of all the sh*t by myself anymore. My brother and sis in law have the attitude of " I can do what I want, say what I want, and we don't have to answer to nobody". They get very, very nasty at the drime of a dime. Hell, if I can just show you the text messages that they have sent me, you all would tell me to run and run fast. Nobody is safe in their wrath. My sister in laws family contacted ME one time because of nastiness my sister in law and brother unleashed onto them. You all have no idea how toxic and cruel they are.


Thank you Bleed the freak, it might have took me almost 10 years to get there, but I am here. It use to tear me apart, TEAR ME APART to even think about leaving the kids, but five months ago, I finally made peace with it. I never thought I'd get there but I did. My brother and his life is so drama and toxic infested, I could write a book. You all wouldn't even believe half the sh*t I wrote. The only way to get away from it, is to seperate myself from all of them.


It's hard enough dealing with the severe depression of the way they treated me, I can't do it anymore.
 
"I would not continue to subject myself to verbal and emotional abuse in order to maintain an active role in the lives of my nieces/nephews."

I subjected myself to it all for years and years and years because I love my neice and nephews so very much and they love me. Trust me, you are not the first to have told me that. I had a friend get very angry with me because I wouldn't seperate myself but I finally did. Callie, I tried many ways with them, every single way possible , boundries don't work with them. The situation with the dogs was the first time ever I put my foot down with them and it took 3 months just to get them to agree with it, even though they'd lied but at least they did try to lie to appease me which they never did before. So at least there was effort there this time. Keep in mind, the only reason why they even tried is because they need a babysitter. Other than that, I wouldn't even be thought of. They do see how much the kids love me and miss me and that does play a part with them, but a very minor one. A very minor one.

Edited*** Please re-read. Sorry for the confusion.


Unfortunately even if everything were on my terms, at my house and all that, the crap still happens. We have tried every way possible where I would just have interactions with the kids and not them but it doesn't stop anything. Wish it were that easy. We tried that multiple times and didn't work.
 

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