Laava said:
My life is going well but it is so hard to find someone who doesn't view you as just a sexual object or fetish....I thought this guy and I were falling in love about a year ago, only to tell me flat out that he was using me. I don't dress provocatively and I am actually sweet. I wish society didn't stigmatize us so much.
I have very little experience or knowledge about trans. I wanted to respond all the same because I do understand social isolation because that has been my life. Only this year have I begun to understand the gravity of being viewed as an object - prior to this "enlightenment" I figured women enjoy male attention. It should validate their self image, in my old-thinking. Now, I've begun seeing these experiences as creating an unsafe environment...being stared at, can be intimidating. My fiance is the most attractive woman I've ever had the privilege of being with, and up until this point, my old way of thinking was the type of feedback I would give to the women I've been with. (enjoy the attention, I'd say.) Now I know differently because I have seen what she goes through.
Back to you, this probably applies only in another form.
As for society, patience is the key. Things appear to be changing rather rapidly. Gays and Transgender...or to sum it all up LGBT - this culture is becoming accepted more and more. Some parts of the country (USA) are less conservative than others. Living here in the state of NY, or at least in my portion of the state, it's very conservative. Yet, in this small town I live in it's become more normal to see transgender people shopping at walmart with their partners. Five years ago, this was nothing you would have seen around here. So if it's here, it's probably 10 times more common in the less conservative communities...NYC for instance. I've walked around there, all over Manhattan Island and the LGBT population appears at ease, and comfortable being out and about, and accepted.
As they say in real estate: location location location. (hint hint)
The moral of the story, learn the art of dismissal. Believe in who you are, on your own. Look to yourself for validation, create a life-routine that keeps you safe. If you want to date, I recommend staying off dating sites or apps...and for your own safety, use the old fashioned approach, being introduced via friends or co workers. Put dating as a low priority, and keep working on yourself, and your situation. A relationship will happen, when it happens. The key is to not lose yourself or your safety and security, trying to find that relationship. Become a self sufficient "island" - that will make you strong.