<Not sure about a subject>

Greetings!

Having spent a while roaming through the forum as an observer, its taken a while for me to register myself and finally post something here.

Life seems to have changed a lot for me over the past couple of years, as I sit back and reflect on the many things that have happened. It is funny to see how I have changed in the process as well. From being a light-introvert, I have managed to shut myself down quite successfully over these years. 

It seems have stemmed from the fact that my mother passed away when I was in college, and that was a heavy blow for me. The guilt of not being with her for those years that I left seems to have stung. Though, I have a supportive dad and sister, the connection that I had with my mother was much deeper. 

After many a downward spirals, and stupid decisions - I seem to have crossed that figurative bridge to where I am today. I function as anyone does every single day, but you know that feeling of something missing in the process? That keeps pinching at me every night as I lie down to sleep. 

I am trying my best to push my own comfort-zone and get myself to do the things that I enjoyed doing before. It daunting task, but hopefully this time around things can pick up and look better. 

Anyway, I guess that's about it for me. I am glad that I finally found a safe space to just talk, hear and feel something. 

Cheers, and thanks for reading

Welcome, I'm really sorry to hear about your recent hardships. Losing a loved one is the most painful thing in the world.

Sorry to hear about your loss, and I'm sorry you feel like you abandoned her for the years spend at college, mostly because I'm quite sure this was probably one of the things she was most proud off in life. Most parents will happily sacrifice their own life if they know their kids will get everything they need to make it in life, I say most because all humans are different and there is nothing that applies to all except that one day... we all must die.

Anyways,welcome to ALL