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Explosion

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Hey everyone I've been feeling lonely my whole life and these feelings run deep. My parents and so called friends weren't really there for me when I needed it the most. I feel like no one understands me and I feel like an outcast to the world. I've been pretty shy my whole life. At one point in my life I was even more shy than I am now. People have to come up to me if I want any friends. I feel sort of timid around people. I have been hurt emotionally by many people who were close to me. I have been left out in ways that have left me feeling crushed. I tried talking about my feelings to so called friends and to family members. They didn't understand what I was going through and they just ended up making me feel even worse which gave me a hard time trusting people with my feelings. I don't have a girlfriend which is another thing that makes me feel really alone. The feelings that I have about that give me a really hard time. When I see all these people I know with someone I wish that I could have a relationship like that and I feel lonely that I'm still just by myself. It's very frustrating especially when other people don't undersatnd. I feel severely alone and everyday is a struggle to be happy. I have felt severely alone most of my life. I've always been that quiet kid who's just there. I don't feel like I'm that interesting to people. I was usually left out of the group. It's hard being around people who just make you feel lonley. I feel like there are other more interesting people to hang out with than me. I feel like I would be the last person people would want to pick simply because I'm not interesting and quiet and I feel like I'm just invisible to people. It's like they don't even notice me and they forget I'm there. I feel like if it were in between me and someone else they would save the other persons life and just abandon me. It's a terrible feeling to have thinking everyone would just abandon you because you're not loved as much as other people. When you don't feel like you're really loved because no one really wants you that much. When you feel like you'll never be anyone's favorite person and then you're just left behind like an outcast because someone more interesting and cool comes along. I feel like no one really cares. As someone on the autism spectrum I feel different from everyone else and I feel like maybe people don't really care about me as much as other people because they can see that somethings different about me and they don't like that. So that's pretty much why I feel really lonely among other reasons. Nowadays I get really angry. I started getting really angry a few years back because of people and now have days where I get really angry. Less than it used to be but still just as angry. Before that I would just get the sad and depressing feeling all the time but now that has turned to anger.
 
What I've found over the years is that people tend to gravitate towards what is familiar or relatable. If your friends don't know what it's like to feel how you feel then they tend to not understand it, thus they leave you feeling the way they do which may not be their intention. It's not their fault because many just don't know what to do or may not even realize that what they are doing is having an adverse affect on you. Sometimes it's good to find a person you really trust and try opening up to them, explain how you feel and help them understand. With today's society there is such an emotional disconnect with people, I think everyone would benifit if they taught emotional support classes in schools and how to recognize certain signs.
 
Explosion said:
Hey everyone I've been feeling lonely my whole life and these feelings run deep. My parents and so called friends weren't really there for me when I needed it the most. I feel like no one understands me and I feel like an outcast to the world. I've been pretty shy my whole life. At one point in my life I was even more shy than I am now. People have to come up to me if I want any friends. I feel sort of timid around people. I have been hurt emotionally by many people who were close to me. I have been left out in ways that have left me feeling crushed. I tried talking about my feelings to so called friends and to family members. They didn't understand what I was going through and they just ended up making me feel even worse which gave me a hard time trusting people with my feelings. I don't have a girlfriend which is another thing that makes me feel really alone. The feelings that I have about that give me a really hard time. When I see all these people I know with someone I wish that I could have a relationship like that and I feel lonely that I'm still just by myself. It's very frustrating especially when other people don't undersatnd. I feel severely alone and everyday is a struggle to be happy. I have felt severely alone most of my life. I've always been that quiet kid who's just there. I don't feel like I'm that interesting to people. I was usually left out of the group. It's hard being around people who just make you feel lonley. I feel like there are other more interesting people to hang out with than me. I feel like I would be the last person people would want to pick simply because I'm not interesting and quiet and I feel like I'm just invisible to people. It's like they don't even notice me and they forget I'm there. I feel like if it were in between me and someone else they would save the other persons life and just abandon me. It's a terrible feeling to have thinking everyone would just abandon you because you're not loved as much as other people. When you don't feel like you're really loved because no one really wants you that much. When you feel like you'll never be anyone's favorite person and then you're just left behind like an outcast because someone more interesting and cool comes along. I feel like no one really cares. As someone on the autism spectrum I feel different from everyone else and I feel like maybe people don't really care about me as much as other people because they can see that somethings different about me and they don't like that. So that's pretty much why I feel really lonely among other reasons. Nowadays I get really angry. I started getting really angry a few years back because of people and now have days where I get really angry. Less than it used to be but still just as angry. Before that I would just get the sad and depressing feeling all the time but now that has turned to anger.

This type of anxiety is very difficult to deal with. But, it does get better. Have you tried sitting down with your friends and family and tell them how they hurt your feelings the last time you talked with them? If they know how you truly felt after that conversation, maybe they would be more open to helping. you. The feeling of lonliness overcomes me sometime, but, I have to sit back and tell myself that the people around me truly care about me. I hope everything works out for you!
 

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