Loneliness, rejection, solitude, unhappiness.....

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Mca82

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Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx
 
Hi and welcome. I don't have any advice I'm afraid but just wanted to say I hear you. I too am exhausted with life, feel like a burden to people around me and feel abandoned by people who assured me they would be there when I needed them and, of course, weren't. So while I can't say anything reassuring or helpful to you, at least know I'm right here with you! Take care.
 
Mca82 said:
Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx

I feel the same way. I hope you feel better soon.
 
I feel this two somtimes, I didn’t really enjoy high school that much. Everyone was either a jerk or kinda stuck up, and I didn’t really know how to start small talk with people who weren’t my friends.

It feels like social networking has made it harder to get new friends. Before you’d play outside or go over to other peoples houses for fun. Now everyone just sits on their phone. I notice this a lot wile I’m on the buss going to and from work. Everyone acts like they are alone when their standing in crowd. I make a point of reading instead of looking at my phone on public transit.
 
I feel the same way. It does take awhile to make new friends. People are so busy.

My wife and I were just talking to an artist who was doing a fantastic art demonstration in a mall court. People would take a quick peek at his art and then move on. The artist mentioned to me that people were moving too fast these days and did not have time to talk. My wife and I had the benefit of talking to the artist for a half hour - got to hear his life story and see his art. We made a new friend with the artist.

I think the key is to talk to people when they have time. Ever notice when you go to a vacation spot - people have the time to open up and say Hello? I see that time and time again.

I have noticed that men become friends around an activity. We are mostly activity (or common interest) buddies. Golf, hunting, fishing, ball games, camping, etc are places where men get together and talk.

My Church small group is another place that I meet new friends. Probably the best friends I have come from my church.
At my church, I like to organize group outings to go watch baseball once a year. That is a way that I get to meet new people.

Hope this helps to give you some ideas. Find an activity you like where people have time to talk. Good luck my friend!
 
I think that some of us are born like this. Is like there is something rotten inside me, and i have accepted the fact that i will be without love and without a sincere friend for all my life. I guess we just need to find something that absorbs our time and attention, like some hobby, work or nature
 
Hey Mca82, I totally understand you :-( Life is really tought with such a loneliness... As you can see, many of us feel similar her, and it often starts since school years or even before.

But at least here we are together, can feel less lonely and kinda socialize online.

Could you please share what are your hobbies and interests? I wish you could find other people who loves same things as you here :)
 
Mca82 said:
Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx
Stay strong friend! I’m sorry you had to go through that but life will get better for you.
 
Hi .

I have not much to really add or a solution. But all I can say is i fully understand what you are going through.

My so called friends have always avoided me and have been ashamed to be seen socialising with me as I have always been treated as the creep or lonely weirdo. Ive never really asked any of them why but the real reason (especially women) have always really been ashamed to be seen being friends with me. I always knew there has been something wrong with me though. Its just ashame noone tells us what.

Stay strong my friend. There are others here with you including me.
 
Mca82 said:
Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx

I totally understand. People are ********.
 
Hey. My post won't be solace too, sorry.
I've been lonely for long time, but now I'm having the worst time.
And I don't know why. Usually I'm kinda ok and used to it. Now I'm so frustrated and sad.
It´s crazy if you think about this, there are 7 billion people on this planet, yet there are so many lonely people unable to connect. :(
 
I hear you.  I am in the same boat as you are.   Throughout school I had a friend up until 8 grade then he went off on his own with no explanation.  Through High School and College I had no friends.  I had a lady friend for about a year two years ago and realized she was using me after I had somethings I was going through and she disappeared because I wasn't there to listen to her as muc has before.  It is hard life to be alone and to know you will be alone until the end of it is even worse.  I know that I have become pretty bitter and am very isolated now due to it
 
Mca82 said:
Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx

I know how you feel! Like you, I'm walking the same road of unexplainable loneliness in my life!  People are simply not interested in starting a friendship or even getting to know who I am, no matter how nice I try to be. Yes, one certainly becomes bitter and resented for having received this kind of treatment all throughout life, so far. And waiting for something to happen or change, is simply in vain. You know, you get killed from day to day by this, as you mean nothing to nobody, while you see others have their significant other. This emptiness is horrible! But like I replied to lonelyfairy, evil does exist in this world and they are the ones with the constant need to make others feel worthless, alone, bitter, resented, belittled, lessened, meaningless, ignored, overlooked and miserable, hating their own lives. That is the cause! No truly and genuinely good person ignore others, are indifferent to others, cannot spare a simple "good morning" or have no time to pay you a visit or a call and spend some funny and amusing time together. Truly good persons are never like that!  You never feel ignored or belittled or ridiculed or played for fool by a genuinely good person!  Never!  They simply are not like that!  They are always noble, empathetic, considerate, gentle, understanding, mature and kind in every way!  But people like this are simply not around!  Even worse, they weren't even born! They were killed in the womb, aborted in a family planning clinic!  That is why so many of us, the ones who were allowed to live, are going through this harsh and painful experience!  It is something we definitely have to learn from and never forget what we lived.  It is also a call to compromise ourselves in more serious ways with building a better world and fighting evil and injustice and working towards a world in which no one feels sorry for ever having been born!  If you wish, please read my reply to lonelyfairy's thread:
"I don't belong to anywhere". We, the ones going through this painful experience for so many years already, have to come to the conclusion that definitely something is seriously wrong somewhere.  And whatever it is, is a very big and huge something!

Whenever you feel you need someone to talk to, send me a message to my dropbox.  I'll be glad to answer every time!  Good luck!
 
Mca82 said:
Hi, first time poster....just venting really as have no onelse to talk to. Does anyone understand that the harder you try to befriend people, the more they back off or is this just me? All through my life since I can remember I would consider myself to be lonely/isolated. Never had any friends through primary, junior or senior school. Was bullied throughout. Tried and tried and tried to be kind, thoughtful, have a good sense of humour etc, but to no avail. Nobody ever wanted to know me at all...All I ever do is find myself alone sitting crying or watching youtube. I'm fed up and exhausted with life, its just a burden and I want it all to go away. Thank you for listening. Xx

I can totally understand that feeling. You try hard to make friends and when you finally think that you have found one, they would just mock you or insult you. And, you would end up feeling lonely and hurt. I have gone through this cycle a zillion times since childhood. But thankfully, I have been doing much better over the past few months. Do I have friends? No! But after years of intense therapy, I understood that I have make peace with myself. Having friends is great but it is not everything. If you understand who you are and are content with yourself, then such things won't bother you. I have one or two close family members who are my friends and I am cool with that. What people say is not important. What your fake friends talk about you is not important. By making myself the most important person in my life, I have been way happier than I thought I will ever be. I suggest you try therapy!
 
People are A___holes to the infinite degree.

The more I try to be a friend, be sweet, accommodating..the more it blows up in my face. The more I reach out and offer, or ask for someone to spend time, just talk with me, or text me...….I get pushed to the side.

I am kind of plain, nothing spectacular, I am a small person, I am not loud when I go out, I try to use manners, respect, consideration......and the people on my social media that I see with tons of friends are the opposite of me, loud, obnoxious, very self centered, and I just do not get it......I have ben telling my most current therapist for the past year that there is something deep down inside of me that is very wrong, or broken and it repels people from me. She suggests over and over that I extend myself, that I go out and assert myself, that I do not let others hurt me,,,,,,,,,HA,,,,,,,,,and the more I do this,,the worse my freaking life is...…...I want it to be over a lot, I want to be in a peaceful place of love and acceptance, I am really afraid that this place does not exist.
 

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