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Didou90

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Hi everyone,  i have joined this forum hoping for a listening ear and some advices...
I'm 28 yo and I'm a veterinarian, not currently on work. In fact , the past two years i had a non pleasant internship experience . That turned down my confidence , my self-esteem.  Now , I'm losing my friends and "maybe" I'm breaking up with my boyfriend. 

Previously,  I have been so energetic, enthusiastic and so unstoppable...Currently I realized that I've become so lifeless ,unpassionate and so vulnerable...exactly the opposite ! It's clear that this unpleasant change up  is the result of small , unremarkable,  customary habits ! Who I am today and how happy and fulfilled I am is definitely the result of my thoughts and actions from yesterday !! But how did I get here?  No idea , I wasn't aware.

I'm going through days where I feel like that I'm  not really living, but merely existing. I feel so empty and lost on the inside. Everyday I stay up late at night, mulling over things that I know won't get me anywhere rewarding.  Every single night I cry and I ask myself  the same question,  what am I doing to myself  ?! I know something is wrong. I want to change my situation for the better , but I just feel so emotionally charged and tired that I bearley can do something...if I was in the shoes of somebody else I would definitely say that those are just excuses... Absolutely right, I'm  making excuses.  

I don't know what to do and from where to start ...please help 😔
 
Have you tried talking to a counselor/therapist? I know that helped me figure out what was really wrong (cyclic depression that would get to the point I would get too terrified to even move) and git me back on more level ground (by learning some coping skills and taking some meds to help even me out)

Definitely loom through some of the threads around here as you will probably find others who have worked through what you're dealing with

Hang in there
 
Sorry to hear your situation, Didou.

Counselling might well help, as might as discussion with your Doctor. Have you talked to your boyfriend about your feelings?

And yes, hang in there. Things will get better.
 
wolvesjr said:
Have you tried talking to a counselor/therapist?  I know that helped me figure out what was really wrong (cyclic depression that would get to the point I would get too terrified to even move)  and git me back on more level ground (by learning some coping skills and taking some meds to help even me out)

Definitely loom through some of the threads around here as you will probably find others who have worked through what you're dealing with

Hang in there

Thank you for your reply, 

I can't afford a therapy right now , i'm taking anxiolytic as have been having panic attacks but that's all. I have been trying to do some exercice but my irregular mood is not helping me . Can you recommend any conselor on the internet that give there services for free ? Or can you talk to me through what you have learned after talking to your counselor ? Thank you


PaulE said:
Sorry to hear your situation, Didou.

Counselling might well help, as might as discussion with your Doctor.  Have you talked to your boyfriend about your feelings?

And yes, hang in there. Things will get better.

Thank you for your reply , 

I actually can't afford a therapy right now... yes we have talked me and my boyfriend , but he is ignoring me and i don't know if he care about me anymore ..
 
I feel for you - and shame on your boyfriend for not doing his job better.

I really don't know what to advise, other than talk to him again, and again, about how you feel. If that doesn't work, then I suggest you're better off without him

But keep hanging in there - we're all here to chat and help!
 
Yeah i have some female friends we talk sometimes , but superficially. I don't want to bother my parents with my problems. They didn't know what depression means when they were my age . So they won't understand what i feel. They will say I'm just making big deal out of my situation . You know what i mean ? So that's why I'm talking to you guys so you can help me
 
The past is a lesson not a life sentence.
Is it that the longer you don't practice your profession the more difficult it will be to return? Will a prospective veterinary practice inquire why you dropped out?
 

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