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Pathetic internet habits, how to get rid of them
#1
Yesterday, for the first time in my life, my laptop charger melted, and who knows, perhaps my laptop too.

 Now, I had a very deep connection with my laptop, it was the most similar thing to a friend that I have ever had. I spent countless hours watching movies, animes, tutorials and everything. It made me feel not alone, and it entertained me.

I always knew that it was pathetic and embarrassing and I never talked about it with anyone but there were times where I had to watch a movie or play a game cause the reality was so sad and hostile that a movie was much more pleasant. 

However now everything changed. I'm following a class for expanding my work skills, and I often stay 20+ hours awake. And from Monday to Friday it works wery well, I'm completely absorbed by work and new things. I almost never touch a pc or a social media on these days. 

The real problems comes during weekends. I don't really know what to do besides studying and reading. Is hard to believe but I think they the loss of my laptop is a benediction, it made me realize how socially pathetic I am. Cause during weekends I was used to binge watching things and listen a lot of music. 

Now that Iive alone I invited a girl that works with me to come visit my house, and of course she refused. But the funny thing comes now. She thinks that I might rape or beat her, cause Im a big man and she is a little girl. Is obvious that this is merely an excuse, but is still funny to hear. 

So, this is the dilemma, what can I do to pass my weekends? Going out alone doesn't count since I already spend 99% of my free time alone and I often go alone visiting castles, museums etc

I thought about doing some volunteer work but I don't know where to start. I also though about rugby, but is so embarrassing to let others see and make fun of my dick. This is truly a curse, I don't know how to overcome it, even paid escorts scares the shit out of me. 

Any suggestions?  Some of you have ever done volunteering? 

There is a paintball camp here nearby, but the minimum required for a match is 8 people, I don't even know if I can get to 3
All your anger and your hurt
Doesn't matter in the end
Those days go by
[Image: A174F39B7DCA2014B226A9BC389A1C1689869A07]
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#2
“I thought about doing some volunteer work but I don't know where to start. I also though about rugby, but is so embarrassing to let others see and make fun of my dick. This is truly a curse, I don't know how to overcome it, even paid escorts scares the shit out of me.”

I’m confused. What does your dick have to do with playing rugby? Do you play naked or something?!

As to volunteering, what are your interests? Most associations or groups welcome help, so I would try and narrow done what interests you, make a list, then do some research on possible opportunities.
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#3
You know, shower and everything. Unless you have this problem you can't understand the feeling.

I have many interests but I would like something that involves other people
All your anger and your hurt
Doesn't matter in the end
Those days go by
[Image: A174F39B7DCA2014B226A9BC389A1C1689869A07]
Reply
#4
“She thinks I might rape or beat her”. If she said that to you, avoid her. That’s why you go out to meet people, either volunteering, hobby groups, then maybe drinks afterwards. Invite people round once they’re established friends. As for showers after a rugby match, you can do that in togs or away from the others. No-one will be interested in looking at your dick.
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#5
Congrats for getting away from the social media. I don't have any of those accounts. Though I do have an Instagram account because I participate in art challenges. It's an interesting way to both meet people (in a safe way for me, that is, not in person)...and be motivated to do art every day. I always get supportive feedback from the people I've met there and it encourages me to the point where I spend hours painting and drawing each morning. A year ago, I couldn't even draw a stick figure but with the daily practice, I've come to love it and my skills are really improving. It's something I can do alone here at home and it's not too expensive a hobby. I use mostly dollar store supplies. Another thing I really like to do is spend time in the yard with my dogs. I had a big garden this summer and now I have to fill that void a little bit since winter is just around the corner. Winter is tough on me, I get cabin fever so I do a lot of reading, art, knitting and pet care. Despite how the bf treats me, I also try to do a lot of baking and cooking.

Before I became the hermit I was, I used to volunteer at a library and for Meals on Wheels. It made me feel good about myself and I had some kind of social interaction, which at the time I needed. I also used to take spinning classes at the local gym. And I took some pottery courses too. If you're looking to be social, maybe start with your community center? That's what I used to do.

As for the woman who thinks you might rape or beat her...omg, did she actually SAY that? Try not to take that too personally as hard as that is...though I don't think every man I meet will abuse me, I'm distrustful...not to that point though. Geez.
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#6
Honestly I don't know, she said that she was afraid to come with me cause of security issues for her... Lol I haven't taken it personally, is just that it made me laugh, this is the best rejection I have ever had
All your anger and your hurt
Doesn't matter in the end
Those days go by
[Image: A174F39B7DCA2014B226A9BC389A1C1689869A07]
Reply
#7
Something like gardening, woodworking, or painting might work for an indoors hobby if you want downtime.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
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