Hi folks. I've been hanging around reading posts a pretty long time, and trying to think of something meaningful to say.
But right now I'm so depressed and stressed out I'm almost speechless.
All I can think is to say for the moment is hello and that I feel exactly the same many of you do. For me it's been a lifetime of chronic emptiness, loneliness and pain. Feels like I'm living in a deep black empty void, and that darkness often swallows me whole.
I don't wish to go into heavy details about my life, just sufficed to say it is not going at all well.
Short version is I'm middle aged male, in pretty poor health, unemployed and living alone in a dumpy depressing US town with unfriendly people. Trying hard to get out of here but have no vehicle and nowhere to go. No friends or family to turn to for help getting relocated to a better place, or to offer emotional support. My only life is lived online and that's really bad for mental health.
But for now I'm stuck alone in what has become a living hell. Not much better than prison solitary confinement. There is nowhere to go. Nothing to do. No public transportation and virtually nowhere enjoyable to walk, like a park or town square.
I try to count my blessings that for the moment I have a roof over my head. But I'm on extremely shaky ground and my anxiety is off the charts. A good stable home and one decent friend would be like winning the lottery for me. Without a proper home I will never be well.
I've posted ads in 6 different states, looking for a place to stay and maybe a part time job. But I get no good replies. It's usually months of endless dead silence, and the only offers I ever get come from shady or hostile people, either cyber crooks or just people who sound so flaky and crazy, no way I would trust them with my life.
Guess I've said enough. May post again in other forums, but for the moment I'll end this by saying I feel your pain, and I wish you all the best.
But right now I'm so depressed and stressed out I'm almost speechless.
All I can think is to say for the moment is hello and that I feel exactly the same many of you do. For me it's been a lifetime of chronic emptiness, loneliness and pain. Feels like I'm living in a deep black empty void, and that darkness often swallows me whole.
I don't wish to go into heavy details about my life, just sufficed to say it is not going at all well.
Short version is I'm middle aged male, in pretty poor health, unemployed and living alone in a dumpy depressing US town with unfriendly people. Trying hard to get out of here but have no vehicle and nowhere to go. No friends or family to turn to for help getting relocated to a better place, or to offer emotional support. My only life is lived online and that's really bad for mental health.
But for now I'm stuck alone in what has become a living hell. Not much better than prison solitary confinement. There is nowhere to go. Nothing to do. No public transportation and virtually nowhere enjoyable to walk, like a park or town square.
I try to count my blessings that for the moment I have a roof over my head. But I'm on extremely shaky ground and my anxiety is off the charts. A good stable home and one decent friend would be like winning the lottery for me. Without a proper home I will never be well.
I've posted ads in 6 different states, looking for a place to stay and maybe a part time job. But I get no good replies. It's usually months of endless dead silence, and the only offers I ever get come from shady or hostile people, either cyber crooks or just people who sound so flaky and crazy, no way I would trust them with my life.
Guess I've said enough. May post again in other forums, but for the moment I'll end this by saying I feel your pain, and I wish you all the best.