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Ok, let's jump in
How are you?  Are you in Montreal, Qc?  Because this is where I'm at!
It's hard to give you understanding or not give you understanding because you did not say
To learn how to be alone is something we choose not choose.  Like...breathing which we can hold because it is a voluntary and unvoluntary action.  But...we cannot always hold the breath - we are made to breathe.  And so it is with being alone.  We can choose it but, somehow, someone always ends up in our lives...sometimes like soft snow falling on soft snow and...sometimes like a violent accident.

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