Hello,
Sorry for all you are feeling (and living).
I was almost there some 10 years ago. I managed to get onto a paid program by the government, went back to school (with a pay) and got myself a job.
Today, if I lost my job...I'd be ok.
I have realized that, yes, money helps but, it was only 10% of my problem.
My main problem was how I was thinking.
Today, I never have alcool (which is a downer), coffee (chocolate, minimize sugar too). Try to eat healthy, drinks lots of water.
I get enough sleep AND THINK POSITIVELY.
Each day I feel better - all these things only amount to a certain % but, all helps.
I am also aware that I must always be careful and not slide into dark moods.
I watch fun things, good music, try to laugh - I'll die one day, soon enough that, in the meanwhile, I'll try to be happy!