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You don't "Fit In?" An answer
#1
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It is self-evident. as well as well-documented here and 
elsewhere, that many persons suffer "loneliness" due to
feelings of being completely different from most if not
all other people.

Whether or not this is a bridgeable gap may be a less important question than:
   Is being lonely and different a sign that you are not worthy, or could it be a sign that you are actually better?

Think.  Are most people around you kind, intelligent, honest, creative, brave?

Or are they cruel, shallow, cheaters, fakes,  conformist, cowards?

Could "normal" and "included" actually be evil?

Is it possible that if suddenly they accepted you, that you would find yourself also turning into an evil person?

Maybe your differences really do make you lesser than.
Maybe.  But are you certain?  Maybe even if you think things are hopeless, you can at least do one thing in your individual life that creates some justice.

Maybe you will decide to pretend to be happy and go work in a puppy shelter. Great. Go for it.

But you will still see the evil people all around you.
  You have been bullied, ignored, spit on. 
   You know who they are. 
 You know what they deserve. 
You know it will never get better, it will never change.

Most likely you never will get that job or a girlfriend or be treated with respect and warmth.
  But you can make your life  matter.  You can take action.

You should absolutely NEVER do anything to punish 
anyone that deserves it.  You should NEVER do anything
unlawful.

You have one life, one chance to make it matter.

You should absolutely NEVER do anything remotely violent or unlawful.
Even though some might see you as a hero if you destroyed evil people. 
It is still not what I suggest you do.

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#2
Is "Be Evil" really your advice here? Makes sense, given all your posts.

For those reading this, I implore you to do the opposite of whatever he says in the above post.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 

[Image: Quotefancy-19173-3840x2160.jpg?resize=1165%2C655&ssl=1]
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#3
“Is it possible that if suddenly they accepted you, that you would find yourself also turning into an evil person?”

Strength of personality and character is very important. I think you see the problem with this in school. Everybody wants to be the same, like the same clothes, music, boys, activities. You need to follow rules and be someone else to be accepted. At least that’s what it was like when I was in school. I saw a lot of kids not daring to speak up with their own voice and if you did you got frozen out of the group. For some this way of life continues into adulthood. 
It takes strength and determination to choose your own way, some people can’t do that for different reasons.
I think that it must be hard to live like that. Never finding out what you like, what your needs are.

So... Yes, I do think some chooses the “wrong” and “evil” path to fit in. Deep down they might know it’s wrong but the need to be accepted is stronger.

Hmm.. Not sure if I’m making any sense. 😁
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#4
So, I have this theory that all aggression in life, be it anger or fear, is a result of fear of the unknown and lack of certainty and comprehension...
I don't think in terms of "better" or "worse" because admittedly, I'm really not a competitive person, in fact even in most competitive environments (such as work, for example) the only person I ever compete with is: Myself.

But what I find most interesting is how fear of the unknown and a lack of certainty drives a person...
The first rule of management, is that of Self Management. With great power comes great responsibility, this is true. As such, as a manager, your first responsibility BEFORE reprimanding one of your co-workers is to check yourself: Are your orders clear? Is your training thorough? Is your head in the game, or are you the one who is distracted by outside-of-business thoughts? Are you on task as a manager? Are you overworked and probably need some time off?

You see, it's a double-edged sword...
Without first and foremost properly checking yourself, it is inevitable that you can and will: wreck yourself.
Therefore, the running joke with that in the world of management is:

"Damn! I should've checked myself!" Said the man who wrecked himself."

Aggression is normal, anger is normal. However it's all in how you manage it.
There is no such thing as bad energy, only bad utilization of that energy.

Think of it like a set of tools. In the hands of a mechanic, a simple screwdriver can be useful and have a multitude of uses and purposes outside of just driving a screw into a piece of wood..however, toddlers and small children are likely not to understand anything about them and might accidentally try to put them into the electrical wall socket. The same concept with aggressive energy applies.

Now, if you over-exert force with aggressive energy, it can be just as counter-intuitive, and you will accidentally burn yourself out, get little to nothing accomplished, and most certainly wake up sore later when your endorphins drop after you've had a nap, and trust me, NOBODY enjoys that feeling. However, if you manage it well enough, exerting proper amounts of that energy, you will get a great amount of things accomplished.

A refrain is needed to pacify an aggressive approach just as much as a refrain is needed to stabilize an anxious approach. It DEFINITELY is not easy, but it can be done!

It begins with asking yourself who or what is in control of you, if you are not in control of yourself, and if you are not in control of yourself, how and what can you do and what are the steps that you can take in order to achieve perhaps a better state of self control? <<<<< Now, if you notice with this process, the word can't is not in there. That is because it is a mental exercise, a brainstorm. Don't think about what you can't do, that isn't productive, it doesn't help. Instead, just acknowledge them and try to think about what you can do instead.

Example: You can't harm someone, but you can remove yourself from a situation in which you are getting harmed.

It's also about figuring out what you probably should do, instead of what you feel like doing.

Example: Your girlfriend attempts to make you jealous and/or cheats on you. You feel like you should retaliate, plot against her, and make her suffer the same pain and torment that she's made you suffer, but you should probably just break up with her and move on...because, after all, you were alive and well before your relationship with that person, right?? You will be fine, alive and well after that relationship as well. Chances are that all of the fighting in the middle ground, the plotting against each other, and the whole triathlon of "trying to make things work" will probably (logically speaking, that is) amount to a colossal waste of your time and energy, constantly distracting you from your own self improvement and self management. Now that's not to say that it can't work, because I'm sure that in many situations it can be worked out, but out of my own experiences I do not see many circumstances wherein it actually properly works out.

Humans are among the most interesting of species on the planet, because we are the only species we know of that is fully sentient and aware of the inevitability of death beyond our wildest fantasies of escapism, and yet we spend out time wastefully trying to control and manipulate one another across a variety of scales and reasons for essentially no real purpose or meaning beyond that of a superficial face value.

In a world that behaves as such which forwardly asks me where I fit in and under what soup can label I choose to put upon myself my response is: "I don't, and that is okay."
"Of Fire in Nature, Love in Spirit unkenned,
Life, hath no axle, no spring, and no End"
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#5
(01-13-2019, 12:11 AM)Jessicat Wrote: “Is it possible that if suddenly they accepted you, that you would find yourself also turning into an evil person?”

Strength of personality and character is very important. I think you see the problem with this in school. Everybody wants to be the same, like the same clothes, music, boys, activities. You need to follow rules and be someone else to be accepted. At least that’s what it was like when I was in school. I saw a lot of kids not daring to speak up with their own voice and if you did you got frozen out of the group. For some this way of life continues into adulthood. 
It takes strength and determination to choose your own way, some people can’t do that for different reasons.
I think that it must be hard to live like that. Never finding out what you like, what your needs are.

So... Yes, I do think some chooses the “wrong” and “evil” path to fit in. Deep down they might know it’s wrong but the need to be accepted is stronger.

Hmm.. Not sure if I’m making any sense. 😁

As usual, Jessicat, you are making sense.

I wish you would speak more often in my threads.

There was once supposedly an American history teacher covering the period of time when the NAZI party 
gained power in Germany.

His students did not seem capable of understanding how this could happen.  He let it go.

A couple weeks later, he announced a few changes.  No more sitting where you want to.
Everyone has an assigned seat.   No more coming in randomly.  Everyone enters on time,  quietly and
orderly. Speak only when spoken to.  No slouching. Sit up straight.

He says, "notice anything?  Look at the clock.  Usually we start class at least ten minutes
late because of the way you used to come in and sit down.  Now we are on schedule.
How does your body feel?  Does it feel good to sit up straight with your feet planted firmly?
Can you hear me clearly, instead of three students talking at the same time I am?"

He announces that this is just the beginning.  It is a new method of teaching, and only 
a few classes and teachers around the nation have been chosen to participate.

The students discover that things actually get better and better with this new method and all 
the new rules.  Their grades go up.   They get in less trouble. They treat each other better.
They begin to talk about it to other students, and without any involvement of the teacher,
form a group, give it a name, and a gesture so that in the hall you can show others that
you belong.  They apply the ideas outside the classroom.

After a few weeks, the teacher says that he has a very special announcement.
There is actually a national leader of this movement they have been specially chosen for,
and he has created a special recorded message just for them.

The students are very excited.  The teacher dims the lights and begins the recording.

As it appears, it is of a man shouting in German, Adolph Hitler.

The teacher faces the class and explains. There never was any special group, and there
is no national leader.

The teacher said,

"You wanted to know how the people of Germany could have followed the NAZI party.

Now you know.  Fascism actually does work.   However, it has a price.
People have tried to join your group, and you have not allowed them in.
You've been pretty hard on each other sometimes to keep to the rules.
Only you can say whether or not what happened is good or bad, but hopefully
now you have an answer to your question."

Supposedly a true story.

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#6
(01-13-2019, 12:11 AM)Jessicat Wrote: “Is it possible that if suddenly they accepted you, that you would find yourself also turning into an evil person?”

Strength of personality and character is very important. I think you see the problem with this in school. Everybody wants to be the same, like the same clothes, music, boys, activities. You need to follow rules and be someone else to be accepted. At least that’s what it was like when I was in school. I saw a lot of kids not daring to speak up with their own voice and if you did you got frozen out of the group. For some this way of life continues into adulthood. 
It takes strength and determination to choose your own way, some people can’t do that for different reasons.
I think that it must be hard to live like that. Never finding out what you like, what your needs are.

So... Yes, I do think some chooses the “wrong” and “evil” path to fit in. Deep down they might know it’s wrong but the need to be accepted is stronger.

Hmm.. Not sure if I’m making any sense. 😁


Readers of this thread, consider carefully.  You are being "implored" to do the opposite of whatever I 
say in my post.

Look carefully.  Among the things I say is, "Think."

TheRealCallie implores you not to think.

I also state in my post that you should absolutely not do anything unlawful or violent.

TheRealCallie implores you to do the opposite of what I say.

Only you can judge the caliber of a person's intelligence and behavior.

As always, anyone who dislikes my posts are free to ignore them.

(01-12-2019, 09:44 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: Is "Be Evil" really your advice here?  Makes sense, given all your posts.  

For those reading this, I implore you to do the opposite of whatever he says in the above post.


To the readers of this thread:  

 Consider carefully.  You are being "implored" by TheRealCallie to do the opposite of whatever I 
say in my post.

Look carefully.  Among the things I say is, "Think."

TheRealCallie implores you not to think.

I also state in my post that you should absolutely not do anything unlawful or violent.

TheRealCallie implores you to do the opposite of what I say, so she advocates crime and violence.

Only you can judge the caliber of a person's intelligence and behavior.

As always, anyone who dislikes my posts is free to ignore them.
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#7
An apology for Hitler and Facism.
Right. That always ends well.....
Reply
#8
(01-13-2019, 01:55 AM)bearcat22 Wrote:
(01-13-2019, 12:11 AM)Jessicat Wrote: “Is it possible that if suddenly they accepted you, that you would find yourself also turning into an evil person?”

Strength of personality and character is very important. I think you see the problem with this in school. Everybody wants to be the same, like the same clothes, music, boys, activities. You need to follow rules and be someone else to be accepted. At least that’s what it was like when I was in school. I saw a lot of kids not daring to speak up with their own voice and if you did you got frozen out of the group. For some this way of life continues into adulthood. 
It takes strength and determination to choose your own way, some people can’t do that for different reasons.
I think that it must be hard to live like that. Never finding out what you like, what your needs are.

So... Yes, I do think some chooses the “wrong” and “evil” path to fit in. Deep down they might know it’s wrong but the need to be accepted is stronger.

Hmm.. Not sure if I’m making any sense. 😁


Readers of this thread, consider carefully.  You are being "implored" to do the opposite of whatever I 
say in my post.

Look carefully.  Among the things I say is, "Think."

TheRealCallie implores you not to think.

I also state in my post that you should absolutely not do anything unlawful or violent.

TheRealCallie implores you to do the opposite of what I say.

Only you can judge the caliber of a person's intelligence and behavior.

As always, anyone who dislikes my posts are free to ignore them.

(01-12-2019, 09:44 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: Is "Be Evil" really your advice here?  Makes sense, given all your posts.  

For those reading this, I implore you to do the opposite of whatever he says in the above post.


To the readers of this thread:  

 Consider carefully.  You are being "implored" by TheRealCallie to do the opposite of whatever I 
say in my post.

Look carefully.  Among the things I say is, "Think."

TheRealCallie implores you not to think.

I also state in my post that you should absolutely not do anything unlawful or violent.

TheRealCallie implores you to do the opposite of what I say, so she advocates crime and violence.

Only you can judge the caliber of a person's intelligence and behavior.

As always, anyone who dislikes my posts is free to ignore them.
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Oh please, bearcat... Everyone can see through your
" By all means don't do any violent acts, even if it's Justice" *Wink Wink*
BS remarks

It's not Fascism just because someone disagrees with you, and everyone has a right to read and respond on here if they choose to, whether or not they agree with what you're saying. ( Barring the inciting violence bit, of course )
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#9
(01-13-2019, 02:11 AM)Richard_39 Wrote: An apology for Hitler and Facism.
Right. That always ends well.....

Richard, since you do not post a quote, to whom, if anyone, is your message addressed?

If you are referring to the anecdote I conveyed to Jessicat, it 
is not an apology for anything, merely a story and a statement of facts.
I have not, and do not, advocate fascism.

Fascism factually does work, and factually did improve the lives of millions who lived under
it.  Prior to the NAZI party being democratically elected by the majority of Germans, they were suffering
literal starvation, mass unemployment, hyperinflation of the currency, and frequent riots, partly due to the fact that their
government was fragmented into so many different factions.

Another major factor is the fact that the Germans were not only falsely blamed for World War One,
they were burdened with paying to all other nations the entire cost of the war, which as everyone knew,
was literally impossible and bankrupted Germany.  Another nice footnote is that the French, in violation of the treaty ending that
war, seized German territory and permanently stationed soldiers there in bases.

Unfortunately, it is fashionable to overlook any of these facts.

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Reply
#10
(01-13-2019, 02:28 AM)bearcat22 Wrote:
(01-13-2019, 02:11 AM)Richard_39 Wrote: An apology for Hitler and Facism.
Right. That always ends well.....

Richard, since you do not post a quote, to whom, if anyone, is your message addressed?

If you are referring to the anecdote I conveyed to Jessicat, it 
is not an apology for anything, merely a story and a statement of facts.
I have not, and do not, advocate fascism.

Fascism factually does work, and factually did improve the lives of millions who lived under
it.  Prior to the NAZI party being democratically elected by the majority of Germans, they were suffering
literal starvation, mass unemployment, hyperinflation of the currency, and frequent riots, partly due to the fact that their
government was fragmented into so many different factions.

Another major factor is the fact that the Germans were not only falsely blamed for World War One,
they were burdened with paying to all other nations the entire cost of the war, which as everyone knew,
was literally impossible and bankrupted Germany.  Another nice footnote is that the French, in violation of the treaty ending that
war, seized German territory and permanently stationed soldiers there in bases.

Unfortunately, it is fashionable to overlook any of these facts.

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Of course, I'm so stupid and unknowing. I love you too.
Reply


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