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Lonewolf33

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I’m a fresia-up at work that even my boss starting talking honeysuckle about me while my work partner sat there agreeing with him. I have barely functional relationship without my family. I have no friends and romantic life is an utter joke of never happening.


Anyone else with a completely disastrous life?
 
Okay, for starters, you need to stop being so hard on yourself. If you tell yourself that you're a 'fresia-up' then of course you're going to believe it. I'm not saying that you shouldn't take pride in improving yourself wherever possible, but there's only so much a person can expect from themselves.

Do you blame yourself for lack of friends and romance? Is it something that you're doing wrong? Or is it simply that you're a little bit inexperienced at handling social/romantic experiences?

As for work - everyone messes up at work now and again. If your bosses and colleagues talk 'honeysuckle' about you, that's because they're not very nice. A boss should handle their employees with compassion and respect - not 'talk honeysuckle' about them. He's the problem in this scenario - not you. If you struggle in your field, then maybe there's something else that you might be better at doing?

I acknowledge that I don't have much in the way of life, myself. No friends. Never had a girlfriend. Was treated badly by other kids throughout high school. I'm socially inept, and have very little skills and experiences in the job front. But it doesn't make me feel bad about myself, because I understand that a person's limits can't always be helped.

I define my self esteem by how I treat others. I tell myself that as long as I am a decent human being who treats other people with respect, then I have nothing to feel bad about. Perhaps you should do the same? :)
 
Lonewolf33 said:
I’m a fresia-up at work that even my boss starting talking honeysuckle about me while my work partner sat there agreeing with him. I have barely functional relationship without my family. I have no friends and romantic life is an utter joke of never happening.


Anyone else with a completely disastrous life?

Yep. I always feel like whenever I try to do something that might benefit me, it backfires. Or at work, I tend to piss off supervisors when it wasn’t my intention and I had just made a mistake or did something that inexplicably rubbed them the wrong way.

Just a cycle of negativity, as I feel like nothing ever goes my way. I wonder when it’s finally going to be my time to have that turning point and have everything change for the better, but it never comes.
 
sometimesthewolf said:
Lonewolf33 said:
I’m a fresia-up at work that even my boss starting talking honeysuckle about me while my work partner sat there agreeing with him. I have barely functional relationship without my family. I have no friends and romantic life is an utter joke of never happening.


Anyone else with a completely disastrous life?

Yep. I always feel like whenever I try to do something that might benefit me, it backfires. Or at work, I tend to piss off supervisors when it wasn’t my intention and I had just made a mistake or did something that inexplicably rubbed them the wrong way.

Just a cycle of negativity, as I feel like nothing ever goes my way. I wonder when it’s finally going to be my time to have that turning point and have everything change for the better, but it never comes.

Yea we can be well-intentioned but it always ends up the same way.
 
It's kinda funny. I don't think my life was a *complete* disaster, in fact, I'm pretty sure many people would kill for what I possess and yet ... I hate it. I hate all of it.

I am most certainly a complete failure, there's no denying that. A good chunk of this is my fault, not all of it, but a big enough part to make me feel personally ashamed.
I've achieved nothing, hell, I'm not even able to function anymore. I'm in physical pain, lonely, sad, bitter and above all - tired. I'm broken. I've no willpower left to keep going. Despite what everyone kept saying - it never got any better, the wounds never healed.
It would take years to *maybe* dig myself out of this hole and I don't think it's worth it. At all. In fact "years of work for honeysuckle payoff" seems to be a common theme in my life. Having a chance of a barely tolerable existence doesn't sound motivating, it's more like extending the torture. This was a miserable experience and I'm sure as fresia not going to fight to prolong it.

Well ... suffice to say, I hope others are doing better than I am.
 
X-1 Alpha said:
It's kinda funny. I don't think my life was a *complete* disaster, in fact, I'm pretty sure many people would kill for what I possess and yet ... I hate it. I hate all of it.

I am most certainly a complete failure, there's no denying that. A good chunk of this is my fault, not all of it, but a big enough part to make me feel personally ashamed.
I've achieved nothing, hell, I'm not even able to function anymore. I'm in physical pain, lonely, sad, bitter and above all - tired. I'm broken. I've no willpower left to keep going. Despite what everyone kept saying - it never got any better, the wounds never healed.
It would take years to *maybe* dig myself out of this hole and I don't think it's worth it. At all. In fact "years of work for honeysuckle payoff" seems to be a common theme in my life. Having a chance of a barely tolerable existence doesn't sound motivating, it's more like extending the torture. This was a miserable experience and I'm sure as fresia not going to fight to prolong it.

Well ... suffice to say, I hope others are doing better than I am.

I hope you eventually find peace because really that’s all we can hope for
 
Thanks buddy, I appreciate that.

Same to you, peace is liberating. Especially with how hectic modern lifestyle is. I hope you'll find strength to persevere despite the obstructions.
 
Yeah I know I'm feeling depressed at the moment and can't drink to get through it but I can totally agree.Nothing ever really changed right from the word go when my father messed up my life as a child.It's always been a struggle ,like trying to succeed with your hands tied behind your back. I know I've got kids and a wife but the few good times are far outweighed by the honeysuckle ,it's drama after drama , just long term disastrous prolonged event one after the other with the odd good break in between.I sometimes wonder is it just worth it everywhere you look in my extended family there's crap going on.All the effort you put in its just knock back after knock back all the best you can hope for is good health.

Money worries , people going to jail , selfish kids that think your a ******* money tree but when it comes to rent oh they are miraculously broke even though Amazon goods are still delivered through the post.Co workers you need to trust just walking all over you cause they no your soft and there clever enough and dishonest enough not caring if it could risk you losing contracts worth thousands of pounds..it's all just shut



Never been able to sort out my anxiety issues..can't even walk into a pub on my own now can you believe that I've just got worse.Yeah the odd fragile friendship...but they never last.

I may have veered of your point a bit which I apologise

Good ere in it........Anyway sorry you going through it...I can totally understand...
 
Joturbo said:
I know I've got kids and a wife but the few good times are far outweighed by the honeysuckle ,it's drama after drama , just long term disastrous prolonged event one after the other with the odd good break in between.
That's the thing though. When everything goes to honeysuckle, those few good moments just bring you further down rather than giving you the motivation to keep moving forward because you realize how rare it is for the things to be "okay" and you start wondering what's even the point ...
It's like you're always on a backfoot, trying to make up for the losses rather than ever making any progress.

I was still in the elementary school when my life became a nightmare and it took us over 10 years just to get out of a deep debt. And that was just the first of many, many issues to come.

My family situation is similar, just problems as far as you can see. There's literally 3 people in the whole family still keeping in touch, everyone else, even the part of my family living in the same small city as I am has started ignoring the rest of us off once they've became a bit better off, probably so that the rest of us "beggars" don't mooch off of them.

It's like ... it doesn't matter if you're already down, you recieve a kick after kick just so that you stay on the ground. And those "friendships" are just the best, once they realize they can't benefit from you too much it's like "yeah, get lost loser". And that's not enough, because your own idiotic brain and body get in the way as well. You know you have to do things, you know you have to go somewhere or talk with someone and you dread every time you have to do it. Hands are sweaty, mind's in full panic and you start acting like a complete moron so your already low self esteem just buries itself into the ******* core of the Earth because you end up looking like a jungle primitive being introduced to civilization for the first time.

I don't mean to keep harping on this ... I'm hardly the one with the most serious issues around here. It's just that what I had to bear was too much for me. I'd rather bury myself alive than keep being this ... this husk of a person.

Wish you all the best, guys. Stay strong.
 
Joturbo said:
Yeah I know I'm feeling depressed at the moment and can't drink to get through it but I can totally agree.Nothing ever really changed right from the word go when my father messed up my life as a child.It's always been a struggle ,like trying to succeed with your hands tied behind your back. I know I've got kids and a wife but the few good times are far outweighed by the honeysuckle ,it's drama after drama , just long term disastrous prolonged event one after the other with the odd good break in between.I sometimes wonder is it just worth it everywhere you look in my extended family there's crap going on.All the effort you put in its just knock back after knock back all the best you can hope for is good health.

Money worries , people going to jail , selfish kids that think your a ******* money tree but when it comes to rent oh they are miraculously broke even though Amazon goods are still delivered through the post.Co workers you need to trust just walking all over you cause they no your soft and there clever enough and dishonest enough not caring if it could risk you losing contracts worth thousands of pounds..it's all just shut



Never been able to sort out my anxiety issues..can't even walk into a pub on my own now can you believe that I've just got worse.Yeah the odd fragile friendship...but they never last.

I may have veered of your point a bit which I apologise

Good ere in it........Anyway sorry you going through it...I can totally understand...


No worries this post is about everyone sharing. I know most of us face similar issues feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, loneliness. Life is isolating for some of us especially when you look around it seems like everyone can have functional friendships and romantic relationships. 
 
My life is a disaster everyday. Horrible chronic health probs. I cant work and live with my mom. My only friends r animals. I had one close friend but he killed himself.
 
ahsatan said:
My life is a disaster everyday. Horrible chronic health probs. I cant work and live with my mom. My only friends r animals. I had one close friend but he killed himself.

I’m sorry about your health problems I guess that one blessing no major health problems as of yet.
 
I could've been well off with a high paying job, living with the girl I love and a lot of money in my bank account if I hadn't made the mistakes I made.
I thought I was the genius who didn't need to follow anyone's advise. The end result : All my friends left me.  Gods, I sure was a pompous ass back then..
 

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