sunflower_
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- Feb 9, 2019
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Hi! I'm sorry for the rant but I just really want to talk to someone about this and hopefully get some advice, although most of this will just be me complaining.
I am a very ugly girl and it is starting to affect my life. My weight was always in the normal range but I've lost about 12kg recently and while I hoped to feel slightly better about myself, I don't. I have a very unattractive and boyish body shape and there is nothing I can do in order to change that, narrow hips, wide waist, huge shoulders and flat-chested, the worst combination and to top it all off I have a really big face. Lately that is all I can think about, looking at the mirror for a long time, comparing myself to everyone I see, which makes me feel really guilty, it's better when I am really busy like during exam season but I waste a considerable amount of time just hating how I look and sometimes it is hard to even get up and go somewhere. I worked really hard and got accepted into one of the world's top 30 universities to get a very respectable degree (it still amazes me how I managed to survive the interview), I volunteer for two different projects so I can improve my personality, I am on a diet to avoid gaining all that weight back, I always dress femininely, make sure I smell nice, keep my hair long, yet my confidence is as low as it can be. Talking to new people is so difficult, I don't go to events I want to go to unless I know one of my friends is going too, friends who I feel are only with me because they pity me and honestly I feel sorry that they have to deal with me.
I have never told anyone else about this and I just wanted to get it off my chest, sorry that you had to read through something like that and thank you!
I am a very ugly girl and it is starting to affect my life. My weight was always in the normal range but I've lost about 12kg recently and while I hoped to feel slightly better about myself, I don't. I have a very unattractive and boyish body shape and there is nothing I can do in order to change that, narrow hips, wide waist, huge shoulders and flat-chested, the worst combination and to top it all off I have a really big face. Lately that is all I can think about, looking at the mirror for a long time, comparing myself to everyone I see, which makes me feel really guilty, it's better when I am really busy like during exam season but I waste a considerable amount of time just hating how I look and sometimes it is hard to even get up and go somewhere. I worked really hard and got accepted into one of the world's top 30 universities to get a very respectable degree (it still amazes me how I managed to survive the interview), I volunteer for two different projects so I can improve my personality, I am on a diet to avoid gaining all that weight back, I always dress femininely, make sure I smell nice, keep my hair long, yet my confidence is as low as it can be. Talking to new people is so difficult, I don't go to events I want to go to unless I know one of my friends is going too, friends who I feel are only with me because they pity me and honestly I feel sorry that they have to deal with me.
I have never told anyone else about this and I just wanted to get it off my chest, sorry that you had to read through something like that and thank you!