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Being an ugly girl
#31
(03-01-2019, 07:37 AM)9006 Wrote: How you look is relative. It only takes one person for you to realise that.

I think so too.

But I still feel unattractive myself. This sort of thing is really hard to get rid of. At least I have stopped using "ugly" on me. Just.. less negative words.
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#32
(03-02-2019, 10:02 PM)ladyforsaken Wrote:
(03-01-2019, 07:37 AM)9006 Wrote: How you look is relative. It only takes one person for you to realise that.

I think so too.

But I still feel unattractive myself. This sort of thing is really hard to get rid of. At least I have stopped using "ugly" on me. Just.. less negative words.

It's old Father Cavey here to state that you're far from ugly. I think that our harshest critic is always going to be ourselves... and that's the problem.
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#33
Just take more showers, get a hair cut and hit the gym.
I'm actually David Blane.
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#34
(03-02-2019, 11:53 PM)Cavey Wrote:
(03-02-2019, 10:02 PM)ladyforsaken Wrote:
(03-01-2019, 07:37 AM)9006 Wrote: How you look is relative. It only takes one person for you to realise that.

I think so too.

But I still feel unattractive myself. This sort of thing is really hard to get rid of. At least I have stopped using "ugly" on me. Just.. less negative words.

It's old Father Cavey here to state that you're far from ugly. I think that our harshest critic is always going to be ourselves... and that's the problem.

I hope you're speaking to us both there!

It was proven in a study that the way you see yourself is different from how others see you, so it's a lot to do with psychology rather than how you actually look. I think that if you feel uneasy about yourself then others will pick up on it, it's difficult to give advice because it involves changing the way you think, it's a bit deeper than, say, getting a shower, or having your hair cut.
[Image: 2vj1q3q.jpg]
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#35
(03-02-2019, 10:02 PM)ladyforsaken Wrote:
(03-01-2019, 07:37 AM)9006 Wrote: How you look is relative. It only takes one person for you to realise that.

I think so too.

But I still feel unattractive myself. This sort of thing is really hard to get rid of. At least I have stopped using "ugly" on me. Just.. less negative words.

Why? Why exactly do you feel this way? What is it about you, you think? Perhaps actually knowing can provide valuable insight to change your feelings on the matter.
[Image: giphy.gif]
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#36
I Understand completely what you are going thru. I too was born with less than stellar looks. I have met so many girls I really liked that wouldn't go out with me because of it. They would be friends ok but romantically? No way.. I often think of what it must be like to go thru life as one of the beautiful people. Always accepted, sought after, accomodated etc... All without really doing anything but smiling. Being able to go out at night alone knowing you will wind up with someone of your choosing by nights end.. I dream of such things but I will never have it.It makes me a bit bitter I must add.
 But you know I do the same thing. I have had several girls that really liked me I could tell but I had NO attraction to them. I wanted to but it just wasn't there.
So the best we can do is keep trying, enduring the rejection, settling, and hoping we get thrown a bone by someone we find at least partially attractive. Its very depressing.
 I hope you find happiness. I found mine, my one true love. And she won't speak to me now and hasn't a year and a half. Nothing in my life has ripped out my soul like she did. So maybe not having people close enough to hurt us is a good thing?
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#37
I know this feeling. Most of my life I was subjected to rejection and abuse by most women when I was younger and get a lot of dirty looks when im out like im some sort of freak!

I have been underweight most of my life. I hit the gym hard, hit steroids after a year or two and got way bigger and everyone complimented me for it. I look back at that time now and to be honest. It changed absolutely nothing and didnt make me  happier or better person at all. It infact made me a complete assh**e. I also was left with trusting noone when i looked this way because I was unable to determine why people liked me and if they would have liked me the same the way i was before!

Yes it got me more attention from women. But this actually made me dislike these women very highly and made me bitter leaving me asking myself "Why could these women not be interested in me the way I was before". Im 3 stone down now and just go jogging a few times a week and i really dont give a toss anymore in the slightest what anyone thinks about the way I look. Because its their loss, not mine!!

I think my point, is dont change for other people and try and become someone else you are not. Other people you compare yourself to may have the looks. But they sure dont sound as smart as you or as well educated and probably wont be as wealthy and secure as you.

I dont know what its like where you are. But where I live, most of the attractive people are up their own ass and are not very nice people. The ones I mostly got rejection and abuse from are now cretins who have nothing to show for their lives Smile
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