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I hate my all life
#1
Hi im a 20 years old girl and im currently in college and i have no friend because im so uncool and quiet and shy and introverted.i hate my whole body and appearance,no body give any attention to me in college(neither peers nor professor)although im the best student in college all the professors give attention to that diva girl and i lost all my motivation to study because non of my professor even care about it they only want a pretty ,funny girl to talk to them and flirt with them.every guy that i want they all want that diva girl and they don´t want me.i cry everday for being trapped in a unattractive body and having a boring personality.im always jealous to that girl i wish i could be HER for one day.i hate my whole life..im a LOSER
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#2
I’m sorry that life is hard for you friend, it sucks for it to be that way. But just remember that you are not a loser, life just has a different plan you.
Great men are forged in fire. It is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame.
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#3
(03-16-2019, 04:43 PM)toasty_one Wrote: I’m sorry that life is hard for you friend, it sucks for it to be that way. But just remember that you are not a loser, life just has a different plan you.

thanks for giving me hope 
i know the life plan for me i'll be a underdog and undesirable one for the rest of my life
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#4
Hey, N1998,

The problem with a lot of 'pretty' people is that they have such horrible personalities that their looks are all that they have going for them. And some people are so shallow that all they see are plump, perfect lips and big breasts, or, alternatively, big rippling muscles, they don't care about what's underneath - and that, to me, is kind of sad. I think that I would much rather be admired for my personality than my looks.

Also don't brand yourself a 'loser' just because you don't have perverted professors drooling over you. As long as you're a friendly and genuine person who treats others with respect, then that's all that matters. Everyone knows that 'diva' is just a fancy word for 'vile and stuck up' - so perhaps you shouldn't compare yourself to this girl. Me, I gave up defining my self-worth on the shallow expectations of society a long time ago (I didn't go through puberty properly, so I have a scrawny and immature appearance) - and I recommend that you do the same.

Instead of focusing on how others see you, focus instead on what brings you pleasure. What do you like to do with your time? What are your hobbies and interests? Perhaps you should find a talent that makes you feel good, and stop worrying about what others think of you - because most of the time, other people's perceptions of you are widely inaccurate and, in my experience, extremely unfair.

I hope to hear more from you. Welcome to the forum Smile
To quote a popular werewolf film - 'Everyone's cursed.  It's called life'
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#5
(03-16-2019, 06:43 PM)hewhowalksalone Wrote: Hey, N1998,

The problem with a lot of 'pretty' people is that they have such horrible personalities that their looks are all that they have going for them.  And some people are so shallow that all they see are plump, perfect lips and big breasts, or, alternatively, big rippling muscles, they don't care about what's underneath - and that, to me, is kind of sad.  I think that I would much rather be admired for my personality than my looks.

Also don't brand yourself a 'loser' just because you don't have perverted professors drooling over you.  As long as you're a friendly and genuine person who treats others with respect, then that's all that matters.  Everyone knows that 'diva' is just a fancy word for 'vile and stuck up' - so perhaps you shouldn't compare yourself to this girl.  Me, I gave up defining my self-worth on the shallow expectations of society a long time ago (I didn't go through puberty properly, so I have a scrawny and immature appearance) - and I recommend that you do the same.

Instead of focusing on how others see you, focus instead on what brings you pleasure.  What do you like to do with your time? What are your hobbies and interests? Perhaps you should find a talent that makes you feel good, and stop worrying about what others think of you - because most of the time, other people's perceptions of you are widely inaccurate and, in my experience, extremely unfair.

I hope to hear more from you.  Welcome to the forum Smile

Hi thank you so much for your amazing advices,i felt alot better 
Actually she's not pretty she looks alot like me(like  sisters)but she is a"diva" she got the personality of a attention queen she is extroverted and she knows how to put it out how to make jokes and how to make everyone give her attention.she can have any guy she wants

I hate my body because i had a bad puberty too i'm skinny with immature look too and others bully me because of that.
if i was pretty then it could hide my boring personality.

But i can't ignore shallow expectations of society and thats the main reason of my depression.

Yes i have some hobbies(like watching movie,listening to music,reading crime stories)and unfortunetly i have lots of bad hobbies too(porn addiction and self harm)
and they are ruining my life.
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#6
You are definitely not uncool.
You are the best student in college and I respect that. I get good grades too, but I'm only in the top 5 in my class out of 27 (I'm still in secondary school). I would say that I'm a smart person and I love learning, but I don't have enough motivation to get perfect grades in every subject. Especially, when I'm not interested in a topic, I can't learn it very well. Why do I even have to learn Latin? It's useless. I will never ever need this language in my entire life. So I respect that you can learn everything so well. What are you even studying?

I don't think you look as awful as you say. As long as you don't have severe skin irritations or bad injuries from an accident, you should look perfectly fine. You could even try a healthy diet or exercise to look better if you want. Exercise and eating a good diet should also help you with depression and improve your health and motivation. Also, like others already said your body isn't the most important thing when it comes to making meaningful relationships. What really counts are good relationships. Some people are perfectly fine with just a few goods friends and they don't feel lonely. Even people with many "friends" can feel lonely if they don't have close friends.

I've got a few friends in school and yet I feel lonely because I don't have meaningful relationships with them. Just like you, I'm an introvert and shy. That's why I came to this forum to become less shy, so I can make better relationships. I've already made a small improvement since I've joined this forum. I also don't get a lot of attention from the girls in my class, but I don't really care about it. Most of them especially the most beautiful have not an interesting personality. But I don't know a lot about the shy girls and they don't know a lot about me, but if one of them would talk to me I would be interested to know more about her. You shouldn't be afraid that you don't have an interesting personality. When you are depressed you only see the dark side of things. I guess you should try to find new friends in this forum to overcome your shyness to be able to start speaking to others. If you have problems with depression don't be afraid to talk about it on this forum. Here are a lot of people willing to help you.

What helps me a lot is this heart-warming story and it could help you too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzQ6gRAEoy0
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#7
(03-16-2019, 09:59 PM)Dr_Pixel Wrote: You are definitely not uncool.
You are the best student in college and I respect that. I get good grades too, but I'm only in the top 5 in my class out of 27 (I'm still in secondary school). I would say that I'm a smart person and I love learning, but I don't have enough motivation to get perfect grades in every subject. Especially, when I'm not interested in a topic, I can't learn it very well. Why do I even have to learn Latin? It's useless. I will never ever need this language in my entire life. So I respect that you can learn everything so well. What are you even studying?

I don't think you look as awful as you say. As long as you don't have severe skin irritations or bad injuries from an accident, you should look perfectly fine. You could even try a healthy diet or exercise to look better if you want. Exercise and eating a good diet should also help you with depression and improve your health and motivation. Also, like others already said your body isn't the most important thing when it comes to making meaningful relationships. What really counts are good relationships. Some people are perfectly fine with just a few goods friends and they don't feel lonely. Even people with many "friends" can feel lonely if they don't have close friends.

I've got a few friends in school and yet I feel lonely because I don't have meaningful relationships with them. Just like you, I'm an introvert and shy. That's why I came to this forum to become less shy, so I can make better relationships. I've already made a small improvement since I've joined this forum. I also don't get a lot of attention from the girls in my class, but I don't really care about it. Most of them especially the most beautiful have not an interesting personality. But I don't know a lot about the shy girls and they don't know a lot about me, but if one of them would talk to me I would be interested to know more about her. You shouldn't be afraid that you don't have an interesting personality. When you are depressed you only see the dark side of things. I guess you should try to find new friends in this forum to overcome your shyness to be able to start speaking to others. If you have problems with depression don't be afraid to talk about it on this forum. Here are a lot of people willing to help you.

What helps me a lot is this heart-warming story and it could help you too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzQ6gRAEoy0
Thanks for your advices it really helped me.
well everyone in my class think being the best student is UNCOOL.
Well i have a twin sister and we have a good relationship with eachother but she's so depressed and negative and she makes me depressed and negative too.let me tell you a sad story  one of our professors was so intrested in me at first when he realized im the best in class he didnt give me that much attention though and when that "diva"girl started  flirt with him he lost all his intrest in me and he gave her so much attention and i was almost about to cry and i felt like a complete loser that day

Wow you sound like a very smart guy thats a wonderful thing,how you dont care when girls dont give you attention?????i care about that sooooo much

Actually i like to get to know people in this forum
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#8
I’m sorry you have to go through that. But you should be proud of yourself, best in the class is a great achievement. Don’t let the little things drag you down. The biggest thing is to try to find good in ever situation.
Great men are forged in fire. It is the privilege of lesser men to light the flame.
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#9
(03-16-2019, 10:37 PM)nothing1998 Wrote:
(03-16-2019, 09:59 PM)Dr_Pixel Wrote: You are definitely not uncool.
You are the best student in college and I respect that. I get good grades too, but I'm only in the top 5 in my class out of 27 (I'm still in secondary school). I would say that I'm a smart person and I love learning, but I don't have enough motivation to get perfect grades in every subject. Especially, when I'm not interested in a topic, I can't learn it very well. Why do I even have to learn Latin? It's useless. I will never ever need this language in my entire life. So I respect that you can learn everything so well. What are you even studying?

I don't think you look as awful as you say. As long as you don't have severe skin irritations or bad injuries from an accident, you should look perfectly fine. You could even try a healthy diet or exercise to look better if you want. Exercise and eating a good diet should also help you with depression and improve your health and motivation. Also, like others already said your body isn't the most important thing when it comes to making meaningful relationships. What really counts are good relationships. Some people are perfectly fine with just a few goods friends and they don't feel lonely. Even people with many "friends" can feel lonely if they don't have close friends.

I've got a few friends in school and yet I feel lonely because I don't have meaningful relationships with them. Just like you, I'm an introvert and shy. That's why I came to this forum to become less shy, so I can make better relationships. I've already made a small improvement since I've joined this forum. I also don't get a lot of attention from the girls in my class, but I don't really care about it. Most of them especially the most beautiful have not an interesting personality. But I don't know a lot about the shy girls and they don't know a lot about me, but if one of them would talk to me I would be interested to know more about her. You shouldn't be afraid that you don't have an interesting personality. When you are depressed you only see the dark side of things. I guess you should try to find new friends in this forum to overcome your shyness to be able to start speaking to others. If you have problems with depression don't be afraid to talk about it on this forum. Here are a lot of people willing to help you.

What helps me a lot is this heart-warming story and it could help you too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzQ6gRAEoy0
Thanks for your advices it really helped me.
well everyone in my class think being the best student is UNCOOL.
Well i have a twin sister and we have a good relationship with eachother but she's so depressed and negative and she makes me depressed and negative too.let me tell you a sad story  one of our professors was so intrested in me at first when he realized im the best in class he didnt give me that much attention though and when that "diva"girl started  flirt with him he lost all his intrest in me and he gave her so much attention and i was almost about to cry and i felt like a complete loser that day

Wow you sound like a very smart guy thats a wonderful thing,how you dont care when girls dont give you attention?????i care about that sooooo much

Actually i like to get to know people in this forum

Well, I don't even try to get their attention. As I said I don't like the personality of most girls and those whose personality I don't know I'm too shy to talk to. 
But I don't know why exactly I don't care. When I have to do a presentation in front of the class or talk about myself I always get nervous. But when I sit in class I have no problem with answering the teacher's questions. I guess it's that I'm more in my own world when not everyone is paying attention to me. I'm used to it as an Introvert.
I really think I got used to not get a lot of attention.
Also when I get attention I probably have to give them some personal information about me. For example, when one of my friends said that I don't look so good I couldn't answer his question. I don't talk about my feelings with anyone and I wasn't sure if he would understand me, so I gave him a generic answer. I'm not used to talking a lot about myself but I'm working on it. Sometimes I want to talk about myself, sometimes not. You know we introverts are a little bit strange.
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#10
Have you ever thought of writing your own crime stories? I find that having a creative outlet is a good way of improving your self esteem, because you're producing something that you're proud of. I write stories myself - they're mostly fanfictions, but I've been trying to come up with something original.
To quote a popular werewolf film - 'Everyone's cursed.  It's called life'
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