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What is this?
thanks for that
I dont understand you humourless, do you want to share?
Share with the Lord my dear. Not me.
I think people need to look for and find happiness from within themselves not from any external source, like wealth, social status or power.
Contentment comes from within.  Do not seek it from outside yourself.

i forgive you
Nope, stop hijacking peoples thread
Hi Startover, your situation really resonates with me because I can identify with a lot of the feelings you're experiencing and a lot of the things you've gone through - especially the working in a toxic environment part.
You sound like you're quite intelligent, also you have great personal insight. I think you may have answered your own question in that are you happy at work? Who would be in that type of environment? I've experienced a very similar situation and it was hell.I became depressed. I'm on a lot less money now but I'm so glad I decided to leave that workplace.
While my life is far from perfect, I feel being in a stagnant job where I wasn't happy was slowly killing me.

You're more than welcome to PM me anytime if you'd like to chat.
Why not try living for those who didn't get the chance.  
I'm not making this a competition and I don't in any way mean to imply that there are worse off than you.  There is... there will always be someone worse off, no matter who you are.  

What I am saying is that if you can't find meaning for your own life, do something for others.  Do something who those that wanted to live, bit couldn't, like putting a flower on a child's grave.  Or volunteer at a soup kitchen or habitat for humanity even if you need that help too.  Maybe giving help and kindness to others will make you see how grateful people are for help or how much good there is in the world or giving a family a good thought about a stranger doing something nice.  

It's not always about doing for yourself that gives you a leg up in life, sometimes it helps to forget your own troubles and help others.  It doesn't matter what you don't have,  focus on what you do have. You have the ability to do all those things and probably more.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 
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I think Callie gave you good advice. It may feel counterintuitive to believe that we can help others when we can't help ourselves but if you can give yourself a push and try it I think you will find that it really helps.
I actually meant to post that in another thread, but it definitely fits here too. Helping others DOES help.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 
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