I feel hopeless

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Miasma

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May 8, 2019
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Location
Michigan, USA
I hope I'm not causing any disturbances by posting here.
I'm alone, mostly because I'm a genuinely weird person. A lot of people don't like me. I don't want to wake up each morning, I just want to keep on sleeping. My family's no help, neither is the therapist.
My sadness is mostly caused by an unrequited love for my best friend. She's dating someone else and it honestly hurts me knowing that every second.
I don't want life. Just sleep.
What do I do. Who do I go to?
 
You need to get your mind off it. I know, easier said than done.
Try expanding your circle of friends, but don't drop her as a friend. She hasn't done anything wrong, you just don't need to torture yourself either. Some distance should help, but not if you stay at home sleeping. Get out of the house. Ask co-workers, classmates, other friends to go out and do stuff, or just go do it on your own. Try looking up group activities for anything that you're interested in. I don't know why you think you're weird and people don't like you, but I'm sure it's not as bad as you think. Just focus on finding ways to enjoy life for a bit, if you don't know what interests you try a little bit of everything.

Don't give up on therapy. And if your family is footing the bill for therapy based on a broken heart... I'd say they're being super supportive. Maybe cut them some slack.
 
Can you define "weird" a little bit for us? Everyone is weird in some way. Weird can be endearing too, depending on how you come across.
What do you do? College, work, nothing? As kaetic said, you need to get out of your head. Go do something, join a club, volunteer, go pick wildflowers. It doesn't matter what it is, just get out and do something to stop living in your own self pity.

If you've been seeing your therapist for a while and he's not helping, I would maybe seek out a different therapist. "One size fits all" doesn't apply to therapists and sometimes a therapist just isn't a good fit for a person. But, also keep in mind that a therapist can only take you so far. You have to do a lot of the work yourself.

Are you sure you're not just so attached to your best friend that you are jealous and confusing that for love? If you haven't had many people in your life, it's very possible that you are confusing what you feel for her. I'm not saying you aren't in love with her, I'm not saying you are. I'm saying that when you haven't had a lot of relationships (platonic or romantic), and you feel depressed and alone, it's very easy to confuse how you really feel.
 
kaetic said:
You need to get your mind off it. I know, easier said than done.
Try expanding your circle of friends, but don't drop her as a friend. She hasn't done anything wrong, you just don't need to torture yourself either. Some distance should help, but not if you stay at home sleeping. Get out of the house. Ask co-workers, classmates, other friends to go out and do stuff, or just go do it on your own. Try looking up group activities for anything that you're interested in. I don't know why you think you're weird and people don't like you, but I'm sure it's not as bad as you think. Just focus on finding ways to enjoy life for a bit, if you don't know what interests you try a little bit of everything.

Don't give up on therapy. And if your family is footing the bill for therapy based on a broken heart... I'd say they're being super supportive. Maybe cut them some slack.
I guess I'm just frustrated that my dad always ends up yelling at me.
I'm gonna try going more, yeah. Today I hung out with a friend, it was fun but now that I'm home I feel like everything came back at me again. Thanks though.
 
You are 19 years old, forget about that girl, focus on building up skills in something you are passionate about that is constructive, if you don't have something like that then put all that time you spend sleeping into finding it. Also, if you don't already have them then build up life skills that will allow you take care of yourself and be independent like cooking, cleaning and budgeting etc, etc. Wish I'd been given this advice at 19 and followed it.

EDIT: looking on your page I see you play Viola so sounds like you may already have a passion. Have you ever thought about micing it and running it with guitar FX pedals? Would sound really great I'm sure.
 
Unrequited crushes become a pattern that follow you into adult life. I had a crush on a friend in my late 20s. I wasted years obsessing over her and it made me needy and completely unlikeable. Turns out she wasn't a friend and we had nothing much in common.

What LostintheBardo said, put that energy into activities that don't have anything to do with her, even if it's just a distraction for now.
 
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Unrequited love is a very sad thing.[/font]

[font=Arial, sans-serif] [/font]
[font=Arial, sans-serif]Don’t waste your life waiting for someone who failed to see your worth.[/font]
 
Miasma, your story feels very familiar to me because I've been in a similar position....not in the specifics but in the basic essence.

I urge you to get a pattern of moving started....your music maybe, getting up early in the morning maybe, doing something or some things that you choose to do and actually accomplish enough so that there's a habit of motion and direction in your life.
Then steer that momentum into a positive direction and the big goal of moving into an apartment of your own, or shared living perhaps, away from your family, that is something I highly recommend.

Your dad "always ends up yelling at me" and "...everything came back at me again..." speaks volumes about how your family may not be the best place for you to be living at your age.

Start with small steps and keep your eye on the prize.
 

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