What keeps you from getting your dream partner ?

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Cucuboth said:
Finding someone who is actually willing to talk with me, for a start. Then meet. Then hopefully they will be willing to try ... that’s the first stumbling block for me really, just finding someone who is willing to try.

This.

More than ever, this.
 
my anxiety and depression kill any little spark. And then well time and space, my family is very nosy and strict.
 
Half of it is bad luck. I haven't been in any relationships that were really all that great. It's always easier to see that after the fact. The other half is me. I have other things to worry about right now. And in my most recent relationship I was stepped on constantly by someone who knew how to exploit all of my emotional blind spots. Kind of hurt my trust and soured my outlook on things going forward.
 
I hadn't been to a good therapist for 10 years then Doug showed me rainn.org 800-656-4673-24/7- ¾ of private therapists are scammers so ask, "Why did you become a therapist?"  Their reaction will tell you.  My new therapist seems so much better for me than my last one so I'm grateful. Thank you Doug, Wendy
 
I don't know.

I guess it's not being interesting or impressive enough, and what I can do, if anything, to be those things. Fear that I just don't have enough natural ability/intelligence/imagination to be successful enough in life to be attractive.

I'm not really strong or rich, and I don't have a bunch of wild stories to entertain people with. I don't really have an "attention-getter".

I'm not reckless and dominant either. I'm not charming and charismatic and I'm not witty. I don't have a drive to mock and tease others. I've never had an interest in, or an aptitude for, being "the funny man".

I've been really stumped trying to think of how to be interesting and fun without having this smug, sarcastic, facetious attitude that seems popular, or without making fun of other people and things, but I don't know how to get around it. I think women see me as too nonthreatening to be "cool" or "man enough". I'm like a G rated movie, but they're looking for R. I guess that's a bad analogy because there are some movies that are classics, that would have a G rating. Things don't have to be packed with sex and violence to be interesting and I imagine that goes for personalities too. But it's hard to work around.

Also I'm not even sure who my dream partner is anymore. When I got to this forum 6 years ago, I was sure. Now, I'm not. Some people I thought I liked, I stopped liking when I realized there were things about them that I wouldn't have been happy with. I haven't been happy with the very few women that have ever showed anything even close to interest in me, but I'm not even sure who I even could be a good fit for. If I had to start talking to new people today, I don't know what kind of person I'd be drawn to. I feel like I've seen it all before, and no one really excites me. I know I want to experience having a girlfriend in my life but for a while now I've just felt burnt out.
 
Cucuboth said:
Cucuboth said:
Finding someone who is actually willing to talk with me, for a start. Then meet. Then hopefully they will be willing to try ... that’s the first stumbling block for me really, just finding someone who is willing to try.

This.

More than ever, this.

Still this.

Saw so much during this pandemic that people are more willing to reach out and talk. That it was a great time to use dating sites and apps, and Facebook groups and such. 

But nope. Still just the parade of scammers and catfish, or people pushing their narrow religious views. Nobody to connect with. Nobody to really talk with at all.
 
^ People are definitely way more willing to reach out and talk to others during this Pandemic. The lonely lady next door to me is dying to communicate with someone. Just not me. The problem is people aren't lowering there standards. So, the outcasts of before are still the outcasts of today.

A little while ago I mentioned that if I had scars all over my face then when women were repelled by my looks it would make sense. Well, I just found out that I have skin cancer on my scalp, neck, and face. So, it looks like I'll get my wish.

I don't have health insurance so I'll pay cash to get the big area cut out and stitched back together. Then I'm going use liquid nitrogen to freeze and kill all the other spots myself. I'm sure that will improve my looks. Maybe after that I'll raise my hands and growl at people.

I think if we REALLY wanted to lour someone in we could. All we need to do is have lots of alcohol and drugs available for them. I see plenty of crack whores walking the streets a round here. We could probably even lour less disgusting drug attics if we put some real effort into it.
 
That's terrible finished and I just know there is something that can be done for helping you with health insurance--I am going to check into it a bit further and see what I can come up with and all those spots will be removed and it will not be as bad as you think unless of course you have some larger spots that will leave a scar..They can give you this lotion that will make your skin peel at first at least that is what happen to my friend who had what your having done..He looks really pretty good but it took awhile to get better looking...So sorry my friend and if I can do anything then just pm me..In regard to your posting about people I have to agree and its happening here too...priscella.
 
^ Thank you. I have too much income to qualify for ACCESS (free health care). But, I don't make enough to qualify for Obama care. Each website says I qualify for the other. But not them. Ha! Ha! It's a known catch 22. The dead zone is about $10k - $13K or so. There are many untalked about people in that category. So, I have to pay full individual insurance pricing with huge deductibles. The last time I looked it comes up to about $16K/year with me having to pay the first $5k or so out of pocket. That's more then my income. I refuse to do that.

As far as what I may be going through in the near future. I'll figure something out. I always do. I can read and deal with pain. I don't think I can cut areas of my scalp out that I can't see without mirrors though. That's a bit over the top even for me. But, I have looked into surgical punches. You set those on the area and spin the blade. They cut out a round area. I could create a stop on them so they don't go to deep. Then I could do it in a quick jerking motion. The liquid nitrogen will probably be the best bet though. That works amazingly well. There's also nearly zero blood, much less pain, and much less chance of an infection.
 
Something is very wrong here with your pricing for you can get a good policy for about 400 a month being under 65 or 66 to where you could get medicare then once you hit medicare age the pricing drops a whole lot. Now if you never paid into soc sec.. that could be another matter but really finished I would really check into that further...If you are a veteran they also will help you--call them up....Just turn it into full research and have fun--lol lol...They also have faith based things going on with different religions and stuff like that where they all together buy policies for their people----I think--lol---not so smart in areas like this but I just know you can come up with something for yourself....Now if you make that much money to where you cannot get a policy then stop bitching about money--lol lol...Love you forum friend just do more research---that what it takes,,,,priscella
 
Last year I had a throat problem that I needed to have looked at. I used healthcare.gov (the official Obamacare site) to get the above estimates last year during the open period. I planned on getting insurance for at least one year and take care of everything I could during that time period. But, after staring at the quotes, I decided it was too expensive. I ended up paying about $520 cash directly to a throat doctor and it was taken care of.

I just tried several health insurance online quotes using all real information except for my name and contact information. All that I successfully did was waste 20 minutes for them to collect information and pass it on to insurance agents who in turn will call me, ask all the same information again, and then give me a quote. Then they would hound me and I would get slammed with health related advertisement spams. BTW, you can't get health insurance mid-year. You have to wait until the open period usually in November / December unless you just lost your job with health care, got married, or some other major life event.

I have no idea where you are getting your information. About twelve years ago when I was working full time my employer was paying $650/month and I was paying $120/month for my health insurance. That was $9K/year with a group policy. So, even then it was more then $400/month. I did previously see that there are a few groups, including religious ones, that you can join. They aren't insurance companies. You pay other's bills and in turn they pay your bills. Many times you are severely restricted to who you can see. You pay a monthly amount and then sometimes you pay more depending on several things. From what I saw that was the least expensive way to go.

I just got a quote using Medishare.com. I can join them for:
Monthly Amount          Out of Pocket
$130.00                     $12,000
$181.00                     $9,000
$224.00                     $6,000
$301.00                     $3,000

So, I pay $301 each month. However, before I can be reimbursed, I must spend $3,000 out of my own pocket.

It's still way less money to pay for actual medical costs out of pocket unless something major happens. So, it's a gamble. Hence, the reason I changed my life style a decade ago to a much healthier safer one. Now I think twice before jumping from one ledge to another on my remote hikes.

BTW, the nursing assistant at the doctor's office I'm going to for my scalp issue doesn't have health insurance either. She said it's too expensive. She said she's spent a lot of time researching a good option. But, there isn't one. She said that GoodRx does save one money on prescription drugs though. That's a heads up for others reading this.
 
Well my forum friend you are on the ball and did the research and its great. That health insurance with the three thousand dollar deductible looks pretty good for 300 a month at least until you can get on medicare which is in your case many years away. If you have a emergency for x-rays and mri"s and doctors and whatever that 3000 dollars will be used up and then the insurance will kick in and pick up most of the rest----you are protected this way because you are a property owner if you have high bills owing that could put a lean on the property for your heirs to pay. Check into catastrophe insurance for the hell of it and if anyone on this forum has more information----please pretty please share it because at this point you most likely know more than me about it..Check into Humana and see what they have and also Kaiser see what they can offer. People live their lives and have to live according to their judgments and if you wish not to have insurance and take a chance its okay by me---but I wish you would have a policy of some kind to protect your hard owned home and heirs. Or maybe you could have a insurance policy to leave your heirs to pay off your bills when you pass at a ripe old age of 103 years old....I suggest you get a policy and keep checking you find something good this I am sure of...I have Anthem but I also have a retirement that pays for some of it--not much but enough...So far this year with the testing and broken bones and everything they must have paid in for me about 18,000 ---taking a guess here...Glad your checking. I wish I could get you to change your flashing annoyance----------lol lol...on your posting---too much jumping around and you most likely did it on purpose to annoy me....Take care forum friend and Happy Researching...
 
priscella said:
That health insurance with the three thousand dollar deductible looks pretty good for 300 a month at least until you can get on medicare which is in your case many years away. If you have a emergency for x-rays and mri"s and doctors and whatever that 3000 dollars will be used up and then the insurance will kick in and pick up most of the rest----you are protected this way because you are a property owner if you have high bills owing that could put a lean on the property for your heirs to pay.
Well, $300 X 12 months = $3600 + $3000 = $6600 I need to pay out minimum per year before they would pay anything towards my bills. Also with that group you don't pay for just one year. If you leave you are not allowed back in. In the past twelve years I've only spent about $4000 total for all my medical and dental needs vs $3600 X 12 = $43,200 + the three years I needed it so ($3,000 out of pocket X 3 = $9,000) = $52,200 That's a HUGE difference! Plus my bills were never high enough that they would pay anything towards them. So, I would be in the exact same situation except I would have wasted $52,200. That's crazy! I call that a scam!

Also, I have discovered that there are many different pricing schemes. The lowest medical costs are given to the ones without insurance paying cash. I usually show up somewhere and ask for an estimate for a certain procedure. After I get the stupid look from them, they nearly always say they don't know, blaaa, blaaa, it may cost more if, blaaa, blaaa. So, I don't leave and I continue pressuring them for a quote. They usually get upset, and then they go ask the doctor. They return and say that the doctor doesn't do the billing we do. The doctor just gives us the codes. But, he said he could use so and so code and it would be $XXX for that. That is FAR less expensive then what the person with insurance sees. I decide whether it's actually worth it or not. 

Normally with insurance, the doctor stacks on all kinds of codes, without knowing the costs, and the billing group moves the level to the highest point. The insurance company either pays it or pays what they will. Then the remainder is charged back to the patient. It's all inflated prices so if one is willing they can argue that cost down or get it to go away completely. 

Paying cash is so much easier too. It puts an end to all the BS jerk pricing scams. You pay what's agreed at the time and that's it. I get done what I need and I'm on my way. However, I have experienced that the quality care I received was also this is what you get now don't come back.

Health care really isn't needed when you are young. That's why Obama forced young people to pay for it, even though it was unconstitutional and later removed as a requirement, to make it work for the older sickly people. Now, that I'm getting older I will start needing more medical care so I have to check things out. But, other then an unforeseen event I'm still way better off NOT paying monthly premiums. So far my gamble has paid off. But the odds will be changing from now until 65. Nobody knows what's going to happen to health care in the US. It's a **** mess. Well, except for most of the politicians, the get premium health care and their own premium retirement system. 

priscella said:
Check into catastrophe insurance for the hell of it and if anyone on this forum has more information. Check into Humana and see what they have and also Kaiser see what they can offer.
I did. Again it's not worth it unless I need a lung transplant or something because one needs to pay A LOT before any insurance monies are paid out. A forum user on another site had Kaiser and was quite happy with it. So, I checked into that. But, it's not available where I'm at. I checked Humana too. But, it wasn't such a deal either.

priscella said:
People live their lives and have to live according to their judgments and if you wish not to have insurance and take a chance its okay by me---but I wish you would have a policy of some kind to protect your hard owned home and heirs.
Okay, thanks. Ha! Ha! I have no heirs. A persons primary residence is automatically homesteaded. That means creditors can't take it if there are no loans on the property. The government always can though. Everything we own is at the courtesy of the government. In reality we own nothing. We are just allowed to think we do.

priscella said:
So far this year with the testing and broken bones and everything they must have paid in for me about 18,000 ---taking a guess here...Glad your checking.
Wow! You have some expensive bones.

priscella said:
I wish I could get you to change your flashing annoyance----------lol lol...on your posting---too much jumping around and you most likely did it on purpose to annoy me....Take care forum friend and Happy Researching...
If I'm able to successfully annoy you then I consider the day successful!!! Ha! ha! I was kind of thinking of adding something a little bit more flashy to my signature (what do you think?):

[img=400x225]https://i.gifer.com/U6uD.gif[/img]
 
You are just a bad person to do all of that flashing with pictures and jumping around---terrible... In regard to your health insurance--I agree with you and maybe you could take a gamble on it but I would just feel insecure if I did that at my age 75 . But for you being a younger person I can understand exactly what you are doing and I have to "kind of"--agree with you....I am so glad that you are checking out all the angles of this affair and it makes me feel better for you..It's your decision and I support you either way and just wanted you to know that...Now this flashing icons business is terrible....ugh....Have a bad day...priscella.
 
Ha! ha! Is this any better:

1395079497120430.gif
 
Ha! Ha! Okay, what's this thread about again. Oh yeah, hmmmm. My dream partner......Maybe knowing what my dream partner actually is. My head is so full of what people say we should and shouldn't think and want I'm not sure any more. Political correctness was been implanted in my brain. If I want this I'm evil. If I want this I'm bad or possibly a racists. I'm constantly filtering everything even my likes and dislikes. I guess I really am totally full of honeysuckle now. Ha! Ha!
 

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