Hi everyone,
I'm a 30 year old woman and I have a problem with perfectionism which is making me unable to make any real changes in my life. I'm single and I can't find a job because I get anxious and scared of being criticized. It all started when I was 17, I went to college, I was very optimistic, never knew what "depression" was at all! I had a fight with my roommate ( I asked her to lower the radio volume because I couldn't concentrate but she didn't do it) and that had a very bad impact on me, I couldn't concentrate anymore on my studies, was depressed, always crying, had low self esteem and God knows how much I struggled emotionally to finally obtain my diploma. But I was still feeling like I wasn't smart enough, I was so anxious that I couldn't even apply for a job, always thinking that I'm not going to do well in interviews and scared of the thought of being rejected. I even started taking free online courses to compensate what I thought I missed in college. Then, I started feeling bad about how I look, my mild acne just made things worse. Although, I know deep inside that I'm not ugly but I'm so harsh on myself, I'm always keeping myself down, add to this that I'm a bit thin and don't look like I'm 30, people often think that I am considerably younger than I am, I don't know if I should consider this as a compliment but honestly I don't like it, I just wanna look my age, I'm a woman, not a girl!
I'd like to know how to deal with this and be happy with myself the way I am and really start living and making some real progress! Your tips are more than welcome!
I'm a 30 year old woman and I have a problem with perfectionism which is making me unable to make any real changes in my life. I'm single and I can't find a job because I get anxious and scared of being criticized. It all started when I was 17, I went to college, I was very optimistic, never knew what "depression" was at all! I had a fight with my roommate ( I asked her to lower the radio volume because I couldn't concentrate but she didn't do it) and that had a very bad impact on me, I couldn't concentrate anymore on my studies, was depressed, always crying, had low self esteem and God knows how much I struggled emotionally to finally obtain my diploma. But I was still feeling like I wasn't smart enough, I was so anxious that I couldn't even apply for a job, always thinking that I'm not going to do well in interviews and scared of the thought of being rejected. I even started taking free online courses to compensate what I thought I missed in college. Then, I started feeling bad about how I look, my mild acne just made things worse. Although, I know deep inside that I'm not ugly but I'm so harsh on myself, I'm always keeping myself down, add to this that I'm a bit thin and don't look like I'm 30, people often think that I am considerably younger than I am, I don't know if I should consider this as a compliment but honestly I don't like it, I just wanna look my age, I'm a woman, not a girl!
I'd like to know how to deal with this and be happy with myself the way I am and really start living and making some real progress! Your tips are more than welcome!