This honeysuckle has me feeling like a ******* creep.

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Naizo

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I'm afraid of what I can and can't say to my friend, whether or not I can text her, how much of my feelings I can share with her, what topics I can discuss, etc etc, all because I caught feelings for her and now every interaction between us is tainted by that. 

Dude's standing up for me and telling her she's treating my bad because we like to flirt but she doesn't wanna date me n honeysuckle when I'm not ******* asking them to. Pestering her and making her feel like she's someone that's hard to love no doubt. What a bunch of bullshit, leave her the fresia alone.

Really makes me disgusted in myself tbh. 

Oh I caught feelings for a woman and now she can't be just friends with me because everything I do revolves around how I feel towards her? 

N I got my dad telling me all this MGTOW advice and honeysuckle about how I should ignore her to get her attention. 

Man for once if I had a time machine, what I'd go back and fix is her having to know my ass at all tbh. 

She's a smart, funny ass chick and she don't deserve to have some ******* ******* making her life tougher to live just because he likes her. 

Sometimes I wanna just leave her the fresia alone but she's my friend dude, I can't just ghost my ******* friend or ignore her when she asks for help and honeysuckle or wants to talk. God ****. Feelings taint every goddamn thing. Hurt people. 

Idk man. It just irritates me that honeysuckle can't be easy. If she don't wanna date me why the fresia do I gotta keep having feelings for her. 

I guess I'm just human, but I don't like a **** thing about this side of me she's come to know and I understand exactly why she didn't wanna have a relationship with me after getting to know the dude I can be.

Maybe there's some chick out there that'll adore this overbearing ass side of me that wants to dedicate 9000% of myself to loving her. But I get that for most people that honeysuckle is just cringy and pushes them away and it makes me feel hard to love myself.

I don't have alot of experience with women as it is, and I don't like pushing my friends away because I like them different than I did before and they don't want that from me.
 
Do you actually want her to want you or not? Is it just because you think you're a bad person with bad sides? In that present state, would you even want her attention? Just some questions to ponder.

It would be an awful thing to say "Just don't be friends at all", but I wouldn't have anything else to offer. At least in the short term, depending on whether you think you can can work on yourself and get your overbearing tendencies under control.
 
Meh.

Life is life. honeysuckle happens. Some people are fine being alone, some people freak out about one little kiss.
 
Her thoughts and feelings are actually not your concern-- likewise, yours are not hers. That's just how it is. If either of you proves to be intolerable to the other, you or she will move on. Meanwhile, just be yourself and stop being upset about your own perfectly normal, inoffensive feelings.

That's how it seems to me, anyway.
 

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