Does anyone else feel like people are garbage?

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.

SpiffyPanda

Active member
Joined
Oct 26, 2019
Messages
33
Reaction score
0
I wish I didn't feel this way, but I have been disappointed so many times that I really don't have any energy left trying to give people the benifit of the doubt. I'm so tired of trying to care, facing the same old shallow, boring nonsense, and of constantly being surrounded by strangers. The worst part of being an adult is having to deal with other adults, who are full of hangups and neuroses. And the worst part of it all is seeing myself become just like them - just as frozen and boring and indifferent.
 
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.
 
It might be selection bias but I have the feeling that 5-10% of the population feel like that these days. The people that feel that way and the ones that are garbage do overlap though, so that is nothing to take solace in. There are a few things you can do. Isolate yourself as much as possible if your environment seems to drag you down that much, the internet offers a wider range of potentially like-minded people. Some people also move to a different city or from a rural to an urban space (and vice versa). It depends on whether you have any family ties, good friends or outstanding debts that might keep you in your position. Should you resort to such a decision, keep in mind that there will always be people that drag you down and which you simply cannot avoid, especially if you work anywhere outside your home (like most people) or if you are still in school/college. Then maybe all you can do is become more resilient. Most people long for social connections and you will need that resilience when you go through the usual trial-and-error of finding genuine friends or a partner.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.

Yes, and then you will be all alone. Which is perhaps better than being surrounded by people who don't get you, but still sucks. The desire to be surrounded by quality people will never go away.
 
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.

Yes, and then you will be all alone. Which is perhaps better than being surrounded by people who don't get you, but still sucks. The desire to be surrounded by quality people will never go away.

I'm not alone, so your theory is not correct.
 
TheRealCallie said:
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.

Yes, and then you will be all alone. Which is perhaps better than being surrounded by people who don't get you, but still sucks. The desire to be surrounded by quality people will never go away.

I'm not alone, so your theory is not correct.
It's not a theory, it's my personal experience
 
Some of us feel like we become outliers to society. Deeply ingrained personal identity that "norms" will never accept or ridicule. I think many people fall into this category. Some of us just blend in better to get work done and pay bills. Some not so much. And many of those can be found on these kinds of forums. Perhaps socializing with people here or other mental health type forums will help your thoughts. IDK. But total isolation and not engaging in some form isn't the healthiest answer. At least in my view.
Can you say specifically what you feel is people don't get?
 
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.

Yes, and then you will be all alone. Which is perhaps better than being surrounded by people who don't get you, but still sucks. The desire to be surrounded by quality people will never go away.

I'm not alone, so your theory is not correct.
It's not a theory, it's my personal experience

Probably because you still care about what other people think and do.  Might be closing yourself off and not giving people a chance, too.
 
TheRealCallie said:
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
SpiffyPanda said:
TheRealCallie said:
I have felt that way before.  But why does it matter what other people do?  Worry about yourself, be yourself.  If people don't accept that, they don't deserve to know you.  We are all individuals and we each have the option of conforming to be like everyone else or staying true to ourselves regardless what other people think.  

Yes yes, easier said than done, but possible if you are determined.

Yes, and then you will be all alone. Which is perhaps better than being surrounded by people who don't get you, but still sucks. The desire to be surrounded by quality people will never go away.

I'm not alone, so your theory is not correct.
It's not a theory, it's my personal experience

Probably because you still care about what other people think and do.  Might be closing yourself off and not giving people a chance, too.

How self-absorbed do you have to be to not care at least a little bit? And that's sort of the point - I'm tired of giving people chances and being let down.


PandaSwag said:
Some of us feel like we become outliers to society.  Deeply ingrained personal identity that "norms" will never accept or ridicule.  I think many people fall into this category.  Some of us just blend in better to get work done and pay bills.  Some not so much.  And many of those can be found on these kinds of forums.  Perhaps socializing with people here or other mental health type forums will help your thoughts.  IDK.  But total isolation and not engaging in some form isn't the healthiest answer.  At least in my view.
Can you say specifically what you feel is people don't get?
I feel like people just want instant gratification, and anything that requires them to exert themselves a bit or go out of their comfort level has no appeal for them. It's like they want to close their eyes to all unpleasant parts of life and get upset when someone reminds them that they exist

Also, props to us both being pandas
 
I feel like you want instant gratification if you think I'm self absorbed for stating my opinion based on what you wrote. I never said I didn't care. If fact, I do believe I said I've felt the same way before, so I understand it. But hey, you keep on with that negativity. Seems to be working well for you.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I feel like you want instant gratification if you think I'm self absorbed for stating my opinion based on what you wrote.  I never said I didn't care.  If fact, I do believe I said I've felt the same way before, so I understand it.  But hey, you keep on with that negativity.  Seems to be working well for you.

Yes, God forbid anyone expresses negative emotion
 
but when you find just one nice person it almost like a shock and you have a hope again, just continue be nice to yourself and others

#endangeredspecies
 
I'm sorry you felt that way, Panda.

Have payed a visit to a therapist? 

I have no way to know how big or short your social world could be, but I hope you feel challenged to expand it, you felt compell to explore it's HUGE the way you dare to find your narrow limits.

I live near wood, in a tiny hut but, once in a month I visit my mom to help her (believe me I don't want to visit any city) but I still see there hundreds of ppl I would enjoy to be in their company (except with grumpy ppl)


Yes, God forbid anyone expresses negative emotion"

Really? Why He didn't reproach Moses when he broke the stone where the finger of #God wrote the commands?

If He forbits, then we had a #limited free will 

Maybe you thought about Paul's writings, but he encouraged His followers to "do not sin", and that's a good thought to keep everywhere.
 
Another thought I gained:

I do really hate ppl who drive ignoring the traffic lights 🚦 and those who drive motorcycles 🚲 using their mobile 📲 cells (some of them were civilians and police agents I considered social bargage who had hit children and elder ppl I had in front of me) but, what made them to be "garbage" it was there are unaware and self-centered as any narcissist action I've made when I was aware or alert.

I'm also a garbage bin ⚠☣ when I act selfishly!
 
Diagnosed said:
I'm sorry you felt that way, Panda.

Have payed a visit to a therapist? 

Three times, and it felt just as disappointing and pathetic as I thought it would. Paying someone to pretend to care for an hour a week isn't what I need.
 
SpiffyPanda said:
Diagnosed said:
I'm sorry you felt that way, Panda.

Have payed a visit to a therapist? 

Three times, and it felt just as disappointing and pathetic as I thought it would. Paying someone to pretend to care for an hour a week isn't what I need.

I don’t think a therapist is supposed to necessarily care and be your friend. 
His main job is helping you out of the things that are bothering you.
But yeah, sucks when it doesn’t work out.
 
MissBehave said:
SpiffyPanda said:
Diagnosed said:
I'm sorry you felt that way, Panda.

Have payed a visit to a therapist? 

Three times, and it felt just as disappointing and pathetic as I thought it would. Paying someone to pretend to care for an hour a week isn't what I need.

I don’t think a therapist is supposed to necessarily care and be your friend. 
His main job is helping you out of the things that are bothering you.
But yeah, sucks when it doesn’t work out.
It doesn't make sense to me to separate the two. It feels so fake and wrong to bear your soul to someone who doesn't genuinely care.
 
SpiffyPanda said:
MissBehave said:
SpiffyPanda said:
Diagnosed said:
I'm sorry you felt that way, Panda.

Have payed a visit to a therapist? 

Three times, and it felt just as disappointing and pathetic as I thought it would. Paying someone to pretend to care for an hour a week isn't what I need.

I don’t think a therapist is supposed to necessarily care and be your friend. 
His main job is helping you out of the things that are bothering you.
But yeah, sucks when it doesn’t work out.
It doesn't make sense to me to separate the two. It feels so fake and wrong to bear your soul to someone who doesn't genuinely care.

Why would a therapist get emotionally invested with every single client. 
Say he/she has 15 clients a day. How tiering wouldn’t that be.
That’s like saying all surgeons should get emotionally invested or else it’s wrong or fake to help them. 
At least it is in my eyes.
 
Well they have to remain objective. If they get emotional with client how would that help them? There needs to be a professional conduct and behavior.
 
Allow me to use your words (but I regret I'm far from my PC to type the way I like).
You said, "the don't care..." ?

"Three times, and it felt just as disappointing and pathetic as I thought it would. Paying someone to pretend to care for an hour a week isn't what I need."

Perhaps you were ill-biased, because when I take my Mom (or myself)to the ER I've seen the helped her/me to be healed... Why do you think they don't care?

If I was completely stingy or mean I would think they all are worst than me: That's way I'm attending a beautiful psychologist who is analyzing me, because I've observed I talk faster than ppl understand or, conversely, I've checked they're SLOW to get what I meant and, If I wanted myself connected to my family (and believe me I would love those I liked at distance) I need to be checked by therapist and trained professional. There are too many síndromes I cannot observe in myself.

Why would I think I'm any better than those I 🔖labeled like, "crazy".

If l went for a date, l would be "analized" and probably had to pay a bill with no #bonus or benefits I could say: "I enjoyed myself in the company of someone who would call me back to say: "I want to meet you tomorrow, and after tomorrow".

I'd bet that, If I get hurt, any ER will be Open to give me stiches with a 💉

I thought I just needed 2 or 3 sessions, but the tests Emily does on me needs 2 months, at least.

I hope you find the type of person or gender you think you trust more to Open the pandora box you think it is hidden.

You deserve to be heard 👂and, some things cannot be dealt for free (or openly).
 

Latest posts

Back
Top