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Incels
#1
If you don't know what it is, look it up. 

What do you think about incels and their worldview?
What do you think causes someone to be attracted to such a culture?
Do they inspire sympathy from you?
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#2
The forum is well versed on what an incel is. This thread will likely not go well. There are a few threads already. Just search the forum for incel.

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.
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#3
(11-12-2019, 09:52 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The forum is well versed on what an incel is.  This thread will likely not go well.  There are a few threads already.  Just search the forum for incel.  

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.

That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?
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#4
(11-12-2019, 09:57 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:52 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The forum is well versed on what an incel is.  This thread will likely not go well.  There are a few threads already.  Just search the forum for incel.  

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.

That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?

No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 
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#5
(11-12-2019, 10:10 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:57 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:52 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The forum is well versed on what an incel is.  This thread will likely not go well.  There are a few threads already.  Just search the forum for incel.  

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.

That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?

No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.

That's where we agree. Except I think it's also important to realize that the deeper you sink into the darkness, the harder it is to get back out. The less control you have over your life, the more difficult it is to gain control.
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#6
(11-12-2019, 10:19 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:10 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:57 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:52 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The forum is well versed on what an incel is.  This thread will likely not go well.  There are a few threads already.  Just search the forum for incel.  

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.

That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?

No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.

That's where we agree. Except I think it's also important to realize that the deeper you sink into the darkness, the harder it is to get back out. The less control you have over your life, the more difficult it is to gain control.


While I agree that it's more difficult the deeper you are, I don't think you have less control.  I think it's more you choose to relinquish control to the misery.  You still have that control, you just choose not to use it. 
There was a point in my life when I blamed everyone else and took no accountability for my part in the issues and it was the hardest thing I've ever done to....well, take back my own life.  But it's possible if you are determined and committed.  Sadly, sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you realize there's a way out, but you shouldn't ever give up fighting, even when you are in a deep rut.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 
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#7
(11-12-2019, 10:34 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:19 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:10 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:57 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:52 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: The forum is well versed on what an incel is.  This thread will likely not go well.  There are a few threads already.  Just search the forum for incel.  

As for my opinion...well, it's just another asinine label that people use to blame others for their problems.

That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?

No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.

That's where we agree. Except I think it's also important to realize that the deeper you sink into the darkness, the harder it is to get back out. The less control you have over your life, the more difficult it is to gain control.


While I agree that it's more difficult the deeper you are, I don't think you have less control.  I think it's more you choose to relinquish control to the misery.  You still have that control, you just choose not to use it. 
There was a point in my life when I blamed everyone else and took no accountability for my part in the issues and it was the hardest thing I've ever done to....well, take back my own life.  But it's possible if you are determined and committed.  Sadly, sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you realize there's a way out, but you shouldn't ever give up fighting, even when you are in a deep rut.
Yes, freedom of will is a very interesting thing to talk about... you can really rationalize it either way. I almost agree that you always have that control, except that instead of CHOOSING not to use it, you BELIEVE that it won't make a difference... But can you really choose what you believe? Can you really choose what's true and real? Isn't that the whole point of truth? That it's something bigger than yourself?
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#8
(11-12-2019, 09:38 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote: If you don't know what it is, look it up. 

Or don't. Mostly you'll get a bunch of sensational news articles about mentally ill murderers and terrorists or some compilation of the worst posts ripped from their forums. I'm familiar with the most notorious ones. I also spend time in a chatroom with people that broadly fall into that group. I've met people that fit the stereotype to a T, beyond salvation. But also a lot more that don't. People looking for any answers why their lives suck, people that hate themselves more than anything else, people with serious mental problems and people that have atrocious families and live in isolated hellholes. In the darkest corners there's the big issue of crabs-in-a-bucket mentality. Where memes and anecdotes trump scientific studies and surveys any day. But everyone searches for some kind of clarity, an explanation in the chaos. There are lot of lies we tell ourselves (as a society) to make everything look nicer and fairer. That's not the world we're living in though. I have some sympathy for everyone that cannot cope.
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and I go...
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#9
(11-12-2019, 11:04 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:34 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:19 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:10 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:57 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote: That's exactly why I posted it under controversial. 
So do you think that every problem that anyone has is entirely their own fault?

No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.

That's where we agree. Except I think it's also important to realize that the deeper you sink into the darkness, the harder it is to get back out. The less control you have over your life, the more difficult it is to gain control.


While I agree that it's more difficult the deeper you are, I don't think you have less control.  I think it's more you choose to relinquish control to the misery.  You still have that control, you just choose not to use it. 
There was a point in my life when I blamed everyone else and took no accountability for my part in the issues and it was the hardest thing I've ever done to....well, take back my own life.  But it's possible if you are determined and committed.  Sadly, sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you realize there's a way out, but you shouldn't ever give up fighting, even when you are in a deep rut.
Yes, freedom of will is a very interesting thing to talk about... you can really rationalize it either way. I almost agree that you always have that control, except that instead of CHOOSING not to use it, you BELIEVE that it won't make a difference... But can you really choose what you believe? Can you really choose what's true and real? Isn't that the whole point of truth? That it's something bigger than yourself?

Believing it won't make a difference is a choice, is it not?
Yes, I believe you can choose what you believe.  Just take a look at any of the other incel threads on this forum.  All of them are filled with crap about how women are evil and it's all women's fault that they are incels and this and that.  Most of the world knows this isn't really true, but they have it stuck in their head because they simply will not place any of the blame on themselves.  There is so much women bashing in those threads and in the incel community and what they say just isn't true, for the most part.  Sure, it applies to some women, but not the majority and they generalize it to include all women. 
Or take people who with BDD that believe they are ugly or even fat.  They aren't, but that is what they believe they are, so it is true to them.  One person's "truth" is not always reality's truth.
Want to talk?  Check out the CHAT ROOM 
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#10
(11-12-2019, 11:26 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 11:04 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:34 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:19 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 10:10 PM)TheRealCallie Wrote: No, but I do think any problem anyone has is at least partially their own fault.

That's where we agree. Except I think it's also important to realize that the deeper you sink into the darkness, the harder it is to get back out. The less control you have over your life, the more difficult it is to gain control.


While I agree that it's more difficult the deeper you are, I don't think you have less control.  I think it's more you choose to relinquish control to the misery.  You still have that control, you just choose not to use it. 
There was a point in my life when I blamed everyone else and took no accountability for my part in the issues and it was the hardest thing I've ever done to....well, take back my own life.  But it's possible if you are determined and committed.  Sadly, sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you realize there's a way out, but you shouldn't ever give up fighting, even when you are in a deep rut.
Yes, freedom of will is a very interesting thing to talk about... you can really rationalize it either way. I almost agree that you always have that control, except that instead of CHOOSING not to use it, you BELIEVE that it won't make a difference... But can you really choose what you believe? Can you really choose what's true and real? Isn't that the whole point of truth? That it's something bigger than yourself?

Believing it won't make a difference is a choice, is it not?
Yes, I believe you can choose what you believe.  Just take a look at any of the other incel threads on this forum.  All of them are filled with crap about how women are evil and it's all women's fault that they are incels and this and that.  Most of the world knows this isn't really true, but they have it stuck in their head because they simply will not place any of the blame on themselves.  There is so much women bashing in those threads and in the incel community and what they say just isn't true, for the most part.  Sure, it applies to some women, but not the majority and they generalize it to include all women. 
Or take people who with BDD that believe they are ugly or even fat.  They aren't, but that is what they believe they are, so it is true to them.  One person's "truth" is not always reality's truth.
You can choose what you'd like to believe, but actually believing it is a different story.

(11-12-2019, 11:09 PM)Rodent Wrote:
(11-12-2019, 09:38 PM)SpiffyPanda Wrote: If you don't know what it is, look it up. 

Or don't. Mostly you'll get a bunch of sensational news articles about mentally ill murderers and terrorists or some compilation of the worst posts ripped from their forums. I'm familiar with the most notorious ones. I also spend time in a chatroom with people that broadly fall into that group. I've met people that fit the stereotype to a T, beyond salvation. But also a lot more that don't. People looking for any answers why their lives suck, people that hate themselves more than anything else, people with serious mental problems and people that have atrocious families and live in isolated hellholes. In the darkest corners there's the big issue of crabs-in-a-bucket mentality. Where memes and anecdotes trump scientific studies and surveys any day. But everyone searches for some kind of clarity, an explanation in the chaos. There are lot of lies we tell ourselves (as a society) to make everything look nicer and fairer. That's not the world we're living in though. I have some sympathy for everyone that cannot cope.
Very well put, especially the last two sentences
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