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Now that Christmas of over, I feel no different.
I have not seen my kids, grandkids and I must remain strong.  Why I ask myself, well because I am their Mom and I love them.
Last year I had to beg my kids for a day so we can spend the holidays together, just one day was all I wanted. This year we all agreed to New Year's Eve day, but that did not work. My son was sick, I can understand, but I know I will not get a day for a while or even this year.
I guess I got depressed about all of this after I saw my remaining 3 siblings together and I was not there. You see I do not drive anymore, so no one ever wants to come this way to include me.
I lost my one brother 6 years ago from cancer and that separated my sister and myself. She neglected to tell me about his memorial service. When I asked she said it was up to his wife. The service was in her back yard. I know I should let this go, but I cannot. My remaining 2 brothers are good with me.
I do not know what else to say, I feel like I am banging my head against a brick wall. Club 
I also know that if I were to die tomorrow, there will not be a void in anyone`s life. That is a nasty way to feel. We all want to leave our mark, do we notÉ
you already made your mark, your kids, grand kids.
not being mean to people also is good mark.
is time for enjoying your self. do everything you like, what do you think about slow stitching?

must be me right?  Cool

I feel that way too many times-my kids are out of the house and have their own lives, and I have to schedule visits to see them.  They seem to have no interest in seeing me.  But then I think back, and I remember a time when I was more involved in my own life than my family's, and they had to do the same thing to me.  So I have developed some new hobbies and friends, and remind myself that I raised good kids and that is a hard thing to do in this world.  I make the effort to call them, make them come see me, and go see them too.  I know you cannot go see them, but I hope you can someday be content with what's been given you.  Have you considered trying some new hobbies?  Online ordering and YouTube videos are wonderful ways to help you get started.  Then you could call your kids and tell them about the new things you have going on in your life.
Elita, your situation, frustrations, and disappointments are shared by many here, and as you know, there is no simple remedy.  In my case, I tried to stay close to my parents and siblings, but they had no interest in me or my life. And not having my own spouse and kids has certainly worsened the feelings of being alone in the world with no one to care.  It's a tough burden in life, but most people have some type of deficiency or problem to struggle with.  The thing is, some handle it well and others don't.
In my experience, I've found that most people are pretty selfish, interested primarily in their own lives and current happiness.  Even the few who are loving and kind are usually too busy or consumed with others to focus on me.  So what's a person to do?

I think staying busy with work, exercise, recreation, or other interests can help get one through each day.  But, they don't bring much comfort, peace, or joy in a life that's lacking in relationships. If you recognize that our whole purpose in this life is to first know and love God, and to second love and help others, then a remedy to isolation or loneliness appears.  When we focus on God and others, our own deficiencies in life become less important.  This is the approach I've taken for my lack of good family or nearby friends and it has helped immensely.  It gives me needed strength and understanding with life's problems, a purpose of meaningful things to do each day, and a glorious future to look forward to.

I don't know if you have Jesus in your life or not, but I do believe that a right relationship with him is essential for managing this life's problems and deficiencies.  You aren't truely alone unless you choose to reject your Creator, Lord, and Savior.  

Now here's a nice, meaningful song just for you.

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