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Work lonliness
#1
Do you think it's lonely at the top?Trump and Boris could you imagine them being lonely?Do you get lonely at work and what are the main reasons or are you not bothered ....just interested.
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#2
When I'm at work... Idk some days I would love to just be assigned to a one person job away from everyone else. (Antisocial days... I guess) Mostly I'm bothered when coworkers are making plans to hang out outside of work right in front of me... People I thought I'd been getting along with, sharing common interests, having interesting discussions... For years. And yet, I'm never invited to spend time with them outside of work. Or when you share contact information with someone you thought you were friends with and they never message you. (Twice that happened, one quit, not because of me, and the other is on a different shift, I was on it too while I was in school) It makes me feel like I'm just something they have to tolerate while they're there.
Though I suppose socializing outside of work backfires sometimes. There was a group of girls who would go out drinking every weekend, and it never failed... Every week they would bring in some fresh drama to spread around, usually putting one of them on the outs with the rest of the group. Some idiots never get out of that high school clique mindset.

When my dad retired from the same factory, there were people asking about him for quite a while, some still do occasionally... Some are just nosy (people love to gossip) but I know some actually thought of him as a friend. He'll never talk to them again unless he randomly runs into them somewhere... Was the same with his other job. People he knew for 30+ years and they might as well be strangers now. Maybe some relationships just can't ever go past the acquaintance stage.
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#3
I work at home. I have a group where I can talk to people who do the same job, but all in all, I'm alone. I like it. No one staring over my shoulder, no customers being pissy, no bosses being assholes (though, I do get the occasional email that makes me roll my eyes) lol.

It works for me.
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#4
(02-20-2020, 09:34 PM)kaetic Wrote: When I'm at work... Idk some days I would love to just be assigned to a one person job away from everyone else. (Antisocial days... I guess) Mostly I'm bothered when coworkers are making plans to hang out outside of work right in front of me... People I thought I'd been getting along with, sharing common interests, having interesting discussions... For years. And yet, I'm never invited to spend time with them outside of work. Or when you share contact information with someone you thought you were friends with and they never message you. (Twice that happened, one quit, not because of me, and the other is on a different shift, I was on it too while I was in school) It makes me feel like I'm just something they have to tolerate while they're there.
Though I suppose socializing outside of work backfires sometimes. There was a group of girls who would go out drinking every weekend, and it never failed... Every week they would bring in some fresh drama to spread around, usually putting one of them on the outs with the rest of the group. Some idiots never get out of that high school clique mindset.

When my dad retired from the same factory, there were people asking about him for quite a while, some still do occasionally... Some are just nosy (people love to gossip) but I know some actually thought of him as a friend. He'll never talk to them again unless he randomly runs into them somewhere... Was the same with his other job. People he knew for 30+ years and they might as well be strangers now. Maybe some relationships just can't ever go past the acquaintance stage.

I'm sorry you have to go through that Kaetic it  sounds really painful being excluded like that  Sad.I remember when in a former long term job a geezer inviting everyone out for pizza in the park and just walking right past me.....just killed me being left alone in the office .I'm not sure which is worse being treated like that in workplace or working alone and feeling lonely.....think I know which I would prefer , don't think I could handle your situation well.
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#5
Ty JG, I do tend to go through my vacation at the beginning of the year... 😬
For the most part, I don't think they realize they are even doing it, or maybe sometimes I'm just too sensitive? Whatever the case, I go there to work and earn a paycheck, (except for today I'm using one of those vacation days 😁) and while it would be nice to make lasting friendships with my coworkers, I just have to settle for getting along with them while I'm here. Though, it does take a significant amount of caffeine some days... 😆
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#6
(02-04-2020, 06:25 PM)Just Games Wrote: Do you think it's lonely at the top?Trump and Boris could you imagine them being lonely?Do you get lonely at work and what are the main reasons or are you not bothered ....just interested.

Yep. Work is just as lonely a place for me as anywhere else. Sometimes more, of course. Others working there have made it clear that they don’t want to talk with me, or know me. Always have, right from when I first started there. If they need to say something to me, or fix something, then it will be done via text message or a post-it note stuck to my office door. They get together for after work drinks most Friday nights, but I have never been invited. Same goes for the Christmas party. I know some get together and go out for dinner or lunch on weekends. 

But I don’t bother to try any more. Like I said, they have made it clear that they don’t want to even try and know me or talk with me at all. Only other job I had was worse than this. 

I was always told that work would be a place where you would meet people and make friends, maybe even find a partner ... still get told that ... but it hasn’t been my experience.
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#7
I just went through something like this but in a different way I'd say.

It's not lonely for me at work cos my new job has such nice and friendly people who always do things with each other and include me in. Which has been a major change for me since I didn't do that a lot back in my previous job. But that's what's causing me to feel lonely afterwards.

When I hung out a lot more with my coworkers, I just realised at the end of the day when I'm back to my quiet empty room, it just amplifies how alone I am. Hate to admit to feeling lonely cos it conflicts with my need for solitude as well.
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#8
(02-20-2020, 09:34 PM)kaetic Wrote: When I'm at work... Idk some days I would love to just be assigned to a one person job away from everyone else. (Antisocial days... I guess) Mostly I'm bothered when coworkers are making plans to hang out outside of work right in front of me... People I thought I'd been getting along with, sharing common interests, having interesting discussions... For years. And yet, I'm never invited to spend time with them outside of work. Or when you share contact information with someone you thought you were friends with and they never message you. (Twice that happened, one quit, not because of me, and the other is on a different shift, I was on it too while I was in school) It makes me feel like I'm just something they have to tolerate while they're there.
Though I suppose socializing outside of work backfires sometimes. There was a group of girls who would go out drinking every weekend, and it never failed... Every week they would bring in some fresh drama to spread around, usually putting one of them on the outs with the rest of the group. Some idiots never get out of that high school clique mindset.

When my dad retired from the same factory, there were people asking about him for quite a while, some still do occasionally... Some are just nosy (people love to gossip) but I know some actually thought of him as a friend. He'll never talk to them again unless he randomly runs into them somewhere... Was the same with his other job. People he knew for 30+ years and they might as well be strangers now. Maybe some relationships just can't ever go past the acquaintance stage.

Work friendships rarely transition from the workplace to the “real” world but that doesn’t mean they have no value. A person you get on well with at work might never become a soul mate or BFF but you can still enjoy your work-based friendship for as long as you both work there.

Some people will have more or less to offer you than others. If you give someone your number and they don’t call, then maybe calling you and meeting up with you outside of work is more than they have to offer you. So just ask yourself, does that mean you should give up what they do have to offer? A laugh a chat at work? I say take your wins where you can.
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