TheRealCallie said:
More excuses is what I got from that. Seriously, you want to know why your life is how it is. Because you are negative as hell and you only seem to want to make excuses and blame others.
Yeah, you had a bad childhood. Sorry about that, but your childhood is over. What you do with your life is up to you now. You want to dwell in the past and relive it over and over again, make it an excuse for why you are like you are, go ahead, but that's your decision. You don't have to be that way, you choose to be that way.
Paint all the pictures you want, it doesn't matter. What does matter is what you decide to do. Continue making excuses and blaming others or find a way to do what you want in life.
And stop assuming that just because someone doesn't agree with you that they are ignorant or stupid or insane or delusional. Look outside the "reality" you developed for yourself and maybe see that there are other ways and other options. The more you post, the more it instills that I was right.
You're a blind fool that only repeats what they've heard from everyone else their entire life. All I've heard out of you (and most other people on here) is fortune cookie psychology. People that think they know the right thing to say cuz it's what they heard from someone else. This is also why most people out there with full psychology degrees, aren't worth their salt as psychologists. Just parroting other people's words doesn't make you a psychologist. In order to understand each unique situation, you need to actually listen and understand the words of the subject. Not just scoff anything off that isn't exactly what you want to hear, or isn't exactly what will fit in with what you've told the person. Like, "you're not doing what I'm saying, that's excuses!" Remember these words, as they are some of the wiser and more universal words spoken; "there are no bad students, only bad teachers". In other words, if you've got anything unique that you're trying to get through to me, it's not because I'm not listening, it's because you're not saying it right; that or your expectations are exaggerated because you're not listening to me.
Also, just because a person's physical childhood is over does not mean that it's effects do not echo through a person's existence. Things my mother put me through as a child, still have a passive effect even to this day. Hell, it was only a few years ago that I was able to stop myself from physically cringing every-time she walked by me. As well, if you'd been paying attention on my other posts, or even cared to ask, the end of my childhood was far from being the end of my pain. It never stopped.. and it wasn't just my mother, not by a long shot. I lived with a real prick of a boss that treated me like honeysuckle for nearly a decade. Anyone I've tried to be friends with has used me, treated me like honeysuckle, abandoned me .etc.
Hell, it was only just over a year ago now that I got out of a situation in which I let this guy stay in my place as a kindness to him, didn't get rent or anything for it. He sat around, did nothing the whole time, stressed me out none stop from screaming through his xbox headset, playing loud irritating newage rap music .etc. then treating me like the ******* when I asked him nicely to turn it down.. He knew I was having money problems, but all he cared about was his own comfort. I tried to kick him out a few times, but he grew furious and again, made me look like the ******* and became threatening towards me. I realized sometime after getting him out, after watching a youtube vid, that he was actually a textbook psychopath. Oh, and I only got him outta there cuz he did a violent home invasion on someone he knew and got busted for it. I had to clean out his room afterwards.. it was cringeworthy... Like, I actually found used condoms on the floor, among other things..
And multiple other so-called friends the past few years before that, each one exponentially worse... There's been next to no reprieve from the shitty things in my life, and everytime I make an effort and get up a few steps, I get kicked back down by several.. This isn't the kinda honeysuckle you're used to, trust me. I'm not some bad teen romance level story. I had a bad childhood, boo hoo, my girlfriend left me, boo hoo.. More like, I've been questioning the point of my existence since before the age of five, and I never stopped.. more like, I was that kid, so messed that he saw his classmate whip out his willy, and everyone laugh at it, so thought it'd be a brilliant idea for me to whip out mine and piss on everyone.. I don't really remember what happened after that, but it was bad cuz I blacked out... I have a wonderful followup memory of being followed home by the other kids, forced to get into a dumpster, have rotten food thrown at me, lasted at least an hour.. they called me names the whole time, said the garbage man was gonna come and take me away with the rest of the trash..
That was my first school, I was five..
Is that picture clear enough for you? Frankly, if my mind didn't have such a strong logic core, I definitely would have murdered someone by now, probably a lot more than one.. A person's childhood is the core of who they are.. and I hate myself...