Capn Wannabe
Member
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2020
- Messages
- 15
- Reaction score
- 1
Hi all..
This is an abridged version of my story..
On January 8th 2020, my 18 month relationship ended.
It was a wonderful relationship, with a wonderful person. I truly believed we'd be together for the rest of our lives. Out of the blue, she told me it was over.
I still don't understand why, and it's killing me.
Between January and February, she told me she still loved me, told me if it was just her and I things would be perfect, told me to give it a few months. At the end of February, she told me we had no chance.
In March, I went to her place a couple of times, although nothing happened between us, and I'd leave with a hug. Then, on Easter Sunday, she came around to my place out of the blue, and told me she still had feelings for me. The next morning, she said "This is so wrong"
Nothing much happened in April, but life took a massive turn for me when my dad died in early May. She was fantastic to me that day.
It was her birthday a few days later, then Mother's Day. I went around on Mother's Day after she had texted me, and I could tell she was in a bad way. I ended up staying the night.
Then, about once a month, I'd go over, and end up staying the night.
Things changed again around 2 months ago. I told her off about the mixed messages she'd been sending me, and she ended up blocking me on Facebook. The next week, she unblocked me, and the week after that, she sent me photos of her new car. It was as if nothing had happened. Two weeks later, she came around to my place again.
Now, 5 weeks later, and I've heard nothing from her.....something tells me I will, though. One day.
I miss her terribly, and I love her unconditionally. I feel lonely and isolated, despite having three kids living with me full time. I have friends I can call, but none of them understands what I'm going through....they offer advice ranging from give her space to walk or run away. I don't know what to do.
I talk to a psychologist. He says he believes she may be bipolar, have self esteem issues. He says she may not think she deserves me, and she may be pushing me away because of this. We know she suffers from severe depression and doesn't medicate. He hasn't really offered any advice as to what I should do.
I hate this feeling. I hate the loneliness, the feelings of isolation. I hate what it's doing to me, but try as I might, I can't walk away, because I know she needs someone she can absolutely rely on. Even though she treats me like crap, I want to be there when she needs me.
At this point, I don't know what else to write. There is a lot more to this story, but it eludes me. For now..
This is an abridged version of my story..
On January 8th 2020, my 18 month relationship ended.
It was a wonderful relationship, with a wonderful person. I truly believed we'd be together for the rest of our lives. Out of the blue, she told me it was over.
I still don't understand why, and it's killing me.
Between January and February, she told me she still loved me, told me if it was just her and I things would be perfect, told me to give it a few months. At the end of February, she told me we had no chance.
In March, I went to her place a couple of times, although nothing happened between us, and I'd leave with a hug. Then, on Easter Sunday, she came around to my place out of the blue, and told me she still had feelings for me. The next morning, she said "This is so wrong"
Nothing much happened in April, but life took a massive turn for me when my dad died in early May. She was fantastic to me that day.
It was her birthday a few days later, then Mother's Day. I went around on Mother's Day after she had texted me, and I could tell she was in a bad way. I ended up staying the night.
Then, about once a month, I'd go over, and end up staying the night.
Things changed again around 2 months ago. I told her off about the mixed messages she'd been sending me, and she ended up blocking me on Facebook. The next week, she unblocked me, and the week after that, she sent me photos of her new car. It was as if nothing had happened. Two weeks later, she came around to my place again.
Now, 5 weeks later, and I've heard nothing from her.....something tells me I will, though. One day.
I miss her terribly, and I love her unconditionally. I feel lonely and isolated, despite having three kids living with me full time. I have friends I can call, but none of them understands what I'm going through....they offer advice ranging from give her space to walk or run away. I don't know what to do.
I talk to a psychologist. He says he believes she may be bipolar, have self esteem issues. He says she may not think she deserves me, and she may be pushing me away because of this. We know she suffers from severe depression and doesn't medicate. He hasn't really offered any advice as to what I should do.
I hate this feeling. I hate the loneliness, the feelings of isolation. I hate what it's doing to me, but try as I might, I can't walk away, because I know she needs someone she can absolutely rely on. Even though she treats me like crap, I want to be there when she needs me.
At this point, I don't know what else to write. There is a lot more to this story, but it eludes me. For now..