Not attracted to women my age

As a socially stunted, now middle-aged guy, this is a problem.

I had to take care of terminally ill parent for years then became a depressed borderline alcoholic for a few more; never got to date, etc. etc. Said all that before. 
To sum up I'm mostly not physically attracted to women in my age bracket. They almost look a generation ahead to me.

Am I a creep?

You're attracted to what you are attracted to. As long as they are of legal age, I don't really see a problem with it. There's nothing creepy about that.

What Callie said ^^^^^^

I don’t see anything creepy about it either.

I'll echo the sentiment of my fellow posters above. Not "creepy" as long as they're of legal age. I don't entirely relate to you though, as I can find women of nearly all ages to be very attractive. Several of my crushes have actually been women a fair bit older than myself. I'm 33 now, in a similar situation to you, and I would be open to dating someone between the ages of 25 to maybe 55.

Well I think most people would judge me if I tried to ask out 22 year old's, so we're talking a narrow age band where I can still see the person as a partner but not young to the point of being socially unacceptable. And without the luxury of time either. Pretty soon what hair I have will turn grey, I'll look like an old man and be treated accordingly.

Basically I'm having to learn at 40+ what should have been learnt at school or university, while still pretending be interested in people up to my age so as not to raise suspicions. All I really want is to be in my 20s again but that can't happen.

This should be a cautionary tale to younger 'forever alone' type guys who mope around thinking they have endless time. One day you'll look around and realize it really is over.

ardour said:

Well I think most people would judge me if I tried to ask out 22 year old's, so we're talking a narrow age band where I can still see the person as a partner but not young to the point of being socially unacceptable. And without the  luxury of time. Pretty soon what hair I have will turn grey, I'll look like an old man and be treated accordingly.

Basically I'm having to learn at age 40+ what should have  been learnt when I was in school or university, while still pretending be interested in people up to my age so as not to raise  suspicion and judgement. All I really want is to be in my 20s again but that's not gonna happen.

This should be a cautionary tale to younger 'forever alone' type guys who mope around thinking they have endless time.  One day you'll look around and realize it really is over.

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You're being overly critical of yourself.  First, who cares if your hair turns grey, that's what hair dye is for.  My hair started turning grey when I was 21.  My grandparents were 18 years apart and they didn't get a lot of honeysuckle.  I have a friend who is dating a guy 20 years older than her and she's been with him for at least 10 years.  My ex sister in law will ONLY date guys who are at least 20 years older than her.  I know a few others that are dating guys significantly older than them. 
Fix what you can and accept what you can't.  Self pity will just tank any opportunity that comes along and that's exactly what you are doing.

Not a creep at all, not on paper anyway. But there might be some girls in that age bracket (20s) who would probably consider you a "creep" if you were to show some sort of romantic interest in them and there will probably be some people who will reinforce that label because of the age. Nowadays more than ever

When they are younger then your kids are or could be then it gets a bit creepy. You might be physically attracted to younger women. I think a lot of men are. But, more then likely you'll both loose interest if there is two or more generations separating you.

Yes of course it would be wrong to have anything todo with someone that young. There would not have been a problem dating at 30. The problem is rapid aging that seems to occur late 30's onwards.

why not date grandmas too you know? they got the most experience in bed and are wonderful love makers

I think it's a normal biological behavior for a man, as a young woman is more preferable for a baby birth(talking of millions years of evolution not the modern medicine).
Though it upset me a little bit(that means low chances for an average middle-aged woman).

But I also think that may be if you think you have less chances among young girls, than may be it's a way to avoid a relationship (like you prefer those with who you have less chances). But I don't know of course. If it is not so than I don't see any problem.

And I know some guys who had gray hair since their early 20s, at 30 most have. I think it's not a thing to worry about if you are 25+(though I do a lot so I can understand))

ardour said:

The problem is  rapid aging that seems to occur late 30's onwards.

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They make creams and pills and botox for that...

Who the fresia cares what OTHER people think.  If you are good with it and the girl is good with it, that's ALL that matters.

Azariah said:

why not date grandmas too you know? they got the most experience in bed and are wonderful love makers

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Are you for real? You obviously have no concept of what ardour is talking about. Very poor and tactless advice.

^That is accepted and even celebrated. A 21 year old guy can go on any forum and discuss his preference for being manhandled by middle-aged women and he gets a medal for his harmless kink. Empowered older women can brag about dogging it with men just a couple of years out of college like there's no issue at all. However a 40 yo man admitting he still notices (never mind intends to date) 23 year old girls, suddenly he's got a brigade of middle-aged women on his back calling him a predator, borderline pedophile and just about everything else.

I think it's not about you when they(women) say so, it's just because they want to be loved too, IMO. Some people just try to belittle others to look better.

Theese middle-aged women see, they are too old to being noticed by the men. And if a 20-y.o. guy get a medal for dating them that also in fact means that they are smth, that only a hero can date. So all they(we)) hear is "game's over for you" - at least I feel a little bit annoyed and disappointment when hear I'm too old to date the men of my age. No wonder some women get a little bit angry and say such the things. 

If we all were a little bit more kind to each other the life would be better for all of us. And the unicorns would fly )

4No1 said:

I think it's not about you when they(women) say so, it's just because they want to be loved too, IMO. Some people just try to belittle others to look better.

Theese middle-aged women see, they are too old to being noticed by the men. And if a 20-y.o. guy get a medal for dating them that also in fact means that they are smth, that only a hero can date. So all they(we)) hear is "game's over for you" - at least I feel a little bit annoyed and disappointment when hear I'm too old to date the men of my age. No wonder some women get a little bit angry and say such the things. 

If we all were a little bit more kind to each other the life would be better for all of us. And the unicorns would fly )

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My knee-jerk response is  "you had your chances when men were showing up..."  But that's not true of all women and nobody wants to hear 'game over' no matter their pasts. I imagine it's annoying to hear this sort of thing.

^ than the response could be " but while I had only 15 years of chances you have at least 30. 2 times more time".
Anyway, I just wanted to say that the middle-aged women are not evil, some of them can just be offended(though they definitely shouldn't transfer it to all the guys in the world).
And most of them (and I think men as well and of any age) don't care who you(not exactly you) date - they have their own problems. So just don't pay attention to those who does(if you don't tell them "you HAD chances, now it's time for the young" first but I think you don't), they have problems, not you.

There's always going to be some jackass giving you honeysuckle, it's their issue it shouldn't be yours.
And while I have no experience with this, I know several older women that have dated significantly younger men. They didn't exactly have people applauding them. The one lady(50) ended up being cheated on and quitting her job because she worked with him(22) and the girl (21) he cheated on her with... and eventually married. (that's pretty much all my experience with other people, co-workers) The other couple is still together, but she(60's) was crazy jealous and lost her job because she would harass any girl he(late 40's?) spoke with. Pushed one and got fired. So, I'd be careful. There's a lot of insecurity that comes with dating some one significantly younger than you, and depending on the age difference you might be setting yourself up for heartbreak.

Maybe the viewpoint depends on your gender, because it seems to me that it's much more socially acceptable for an older guy to date a younger girl... and has been for a long time. (So long as she's legally an adult and it's consensual) Sure there are idiots that tease about "robbing the cradle" or ask if she's allowed to drink alcohol yet, etc. But that joking aside, I don't think you're going to run into that much trouble with it, except when it comes to her family, maybe.

4No1 said:

^ than the response could be " but while I had only 15 years of chances you have at least 30. 2 times more time".

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But a large % of young men spend their youth alone without dating options - these are the passive, "boring" guys women ignore in their 20s. We only become options later on. Arguing we have a longer shelf life assumes we all share the same starting point.

I have the same problem. I've tried to date women my age and/or around my age but I just...can't. Of course, it probably doesn't help that I'm a lesbian, but still.