kaetic said:
Are these the same women you've been around your whole life, or is this a new "group"? IMO it makes a difference, but I can understand why you'd have a negative view and group them all together.
I didn't want to turn the thread into my personal blog, but yeah, while a couple of them seemed genuine, I did recognize a lot of the behaviour from when I was younger, except now they can't rely on men to approach, there's a bit of passive aggression if you don't behave they way they want. I noticed a few times they might make some initial attempts to break the ice but then expect me to take over the interaction and show the kind of assertive Real Man confidence they expect. In that sense it's barely any different than the kind of girls who in the past, who if my looks didn't put them off, would judge you within literally a few words then 'go blank' if you weren't confident enough. Since I'm not that attracted any more and a family is no longer on the cards there's little reason to go there, even for purposes of finally getting some romantic/sexual experience.
My own age group was at the tail end of archetypal kiwi/aussie bloke culture which was still the norm in the '90s/2000's. Things have changed a great deal but I'm not young enough to benefit. This gets tedious. The average young male you'd come across back then was an aggressive dropkick who's main vocation seemed to be being a prick to everyone around him while being rewarded for it. There was a lot of nastiness; men were constantly testing out each other's masculinity. "Faggot" and "piece of honeysuckle" were common insults. I haven't heard those words uttered for years now. Not really allowed to feel, not allowed to be interested in anything "different" i.e. creative. I'm exaggerating because individuals vary, but this was the overall atmosphere at the time.
And like I said, people have aged terribly. It applies as much to men if you think I'm using that as an excuse to take shots at women. We come from a heavy drinking, bad lifestyle culture. Overall it's a borderline uncomfortable thought, being physically intimate with a person my own age..
I don't know about you. If you haven't been through relationships then perhaps you also look younger than the skeevy, grey haired, 40-going-on-60 men in your cohort, and have similar 'wtf?' thoughts about the prospect of dating them. Or perhaps you don't care at all about that and are a better person than me.
And nobody seems to want to do anything. Socializing means heavy drinking at a depressing drinking hole somewhere. Always that same old thing. People rarely travel out of their habitat. Arranging things over the weekend is like pulling teeth, so forget it.
So this is what there is for us now. I spent important years focused on a family member and seem to be paying for it with the rest of my life. The only desire is to be 25-29 again, dating and socializing with people that age group. But that's not possible now. Not the most likeable admission perhaps. It's certainly in the category of a pointless/futile/first world complaint.
