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I'm so lonely
#1
I'm so lonely that it is physically painful and I cry every day.

Ever since I was a very young child I felt like I couldn't relate to or connect with other people.

I've never had any real friends.

My family hardly ever speaks to me.

No one ever wants to make an effort anymore. I'm the one always making the effort but if I stopped making an effort everyone else would just completely forget my existence.

I worry about dying alone at home and it would be weeks, maybe months, before anyone found me. I would be a skeleton before anyone finds me.

This has been a lifelong feeling...I began to realize I could not rely on anyone, and that I do not matter to anyone when I was about 15...

I really don't think sharing this here or anywhere else would make a difference. I will still always be all alone. But I'm so lonely every day that I don't know what else to do.

It was easier to tolerate when I stopped trying to get to know people and just accepted my eternal solitude. I wish that I could go back to that mindset. But I don't know how.

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#2
Welcome to the site! I'm sorry you are in so much pain. It was easier for me to stop trying, be alone, and stay alone. Now it's great. Everything is about me. I don't care if nobody wants to talk to me or not. I don't care if anybody finds me attractive or not. It just doesn't matter. I rarely speak to anybody and if I do it's because they want something from me. However, I still have the need for human connection. Writing back and forth to someone else provides me with the connection I need. I would also like to have physical connection. But that's not as important.
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Welcome to the Socialistic States of America (SSA)
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#3
(06-10-2021, 11:27 AM)Finished Wrote: Welcome to the site! I'm sorry you are in so much pain. It was easier for me to stop trying, be alone, and stay alone. Now it's great. Everything is about me. I don't care if nobody wants to talk to me or not. I don't care if anybody finds me attractive or not. It just doesn't matter. I rarely speak to anybody and if I do it's because they want something from me. However, I still have the need for human connection. Writing back and forth to someone else provides me with the connection I need. I would also like to have physical connection. But that's not as important.

I understand completely about people only wanting to talk when they want something. Everyone I ever knew used me and then abandoned me once my usefulness ran out. My mother used to tell me "you have to be a friend to make friends". Biggest lie anyone ever told me. Being a friend to someone gets you nothing but being taken advantage of and then getting kicked to the curb once your "friend" becomes bored of you or finds someone they think is better. I've always been a loyal person and a good listener who tries to see the good in people. But no one seems to want that. They want someone who will heap attention and praise on them, entertain them, and be an audience for their stupidity. Better watch out you don't have any emotional needs of your own. Oh no, not that. That's "toxic" these days. Have any sort of emotional need, and "friends" do their little disappearing act. Every time.

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#4
Welcome to the forums. The experience that you describe is unfortunately, well known by many who come through this way.
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#5
(06-10-2021, 10:56 AM)sadphoenix Wrote: I'm so lonely that it is physically painful and I cry every day.

Ever since I was a very young child I felt like I couldn't relate to or connect with other people.

I've never had any real friends.

My family hardly ever speaks to me.

No one ever wants to make an effort anymore. I'm the one always making the effort but if I stopped making an effort everyone else would just completely forget my existence.

I worry about dying alone at home and it would be weeks, maybe months, before anyone found me. I would be a skeleton before anyone finds me.

This has been a lifelong feeling...I began to realize I could not rely on anyone, and that I do not matter to anyone when I was about 15...

I really don't think sharing this here or anywhere else would make a difference. I will still always be all alone. But I'm so lonely every day that I don't know what else to do.

It was easier to tolerate when I stopped trying to get to know people and just accepted my eternal solitude. I wish that I could go back to that mindset. But I don't know how.
 this is a very sad circumstance which many can relate to, myself included.  sadly, in the vast majority of cases it comes down to not being physically attractive enough to experience intimate connections.  contrary to popular belief, everyone's potential quality of life is based on their genetic quality (or lack thereof) so those of us who have lost the genetic lottery will have a very difficult time experiencing success when it comes to relationships-which really are the only things which matter in life.
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#6
Welcome to the forum. Smile Do you have any hobbies? What do you do to occupy your time? I don't think you should accept an "eternal solitude" because there's no reason to. Everyone has people out there that would be a great fit for their lives. People who will care and understand and help you through whatever you are going through, whether it's good or bad. Keep trying and don't give up

(06-10-2021, 07:46 PM)mgill Wrote: contrary to popular belief, everyone's potential quality of life is based on their genetic quality (or lack thereof) so those of us who have lost the genetic lottery will have a very difficult time experiencing success when it comes to relationships-which really are the only things which matter in life.

Contrary to YOUR belief, that is not true.....and the OP never even said anything about looks or genetics.
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#7
I don't know your circumstances, but here in Cochise County, I NEVER feel lonely with my cats to keep me company. Have you considered adopting a pet? Maybe a couple of kittens so they each have a playmate? I guarantee they will brighten your life... my cats keep me entertained with their crazy antics, and they offer unconditional love (especially around feeding time, lol). If you're not a cat person, maybe adopt a puppy... then you'll certainly meet other animal lovers as you walk the dog, take it to the nearest dog park, etc. Sure, there's work involved, and the expense of owning a pet, but it pays off in the long run. Try  to find a pet (or pets) which will fit your lifestyle... for instance, if you don't want a hyper dog, choose one that's more calm. Moi, I'm a cat person born in 'The Year of the Tiger'---I still like dogs, but I can't see myself ever living without cats, they are too cool. There are entire cat forums on the web too, where one can interact with other cat lovers. Just my $.02, since you seem so sad... kittens will brighten anybody's day! Cheers!!!
"Nothing ventured, nothing gained..."
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#8
"Contrary to YOUR belief, that is not true.....and the OP never even said anything about looks or genetics."

the OP claimed they had no personal connections. this is only possible for attractive people if they do so by choice. studies show that just about every aspect of life is greatly enhanced by being physically attractive and the reverse is also true. perhaps the OP may not realize a possible cause of their disconnection from others may be due to their looks level.

it all comes down to the Halo Effect as studies show that just about every aspect of life is enhanced by being physically attractive and the opppsite is therefore also true:

https://www.insider.com/benefits-of-bein...ier-life-5
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#9
Welcome to the forum, SadPhoenix Smile

I saw before you took it down, that some of your favorite things were classic cars, particularly the '69 Corvette and '76 Trans Am. I'm a Mustang guy myself, but I like those cars you mentioned too, plus lots more. You have good taste!

Do you have any local car shows in your area? I don't know if you will meet anyone there or not, but at least it's something that's kinda fun to do whether you go with someone or by yourself. I know I enjoy just walking up and down the rows looking at the cars.

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#10
I can relate a lot.

Sorry u feel that way too.☹☹😖😖😭😭😿😿
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