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badaboom

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I was shy until the last year of high school where I went from quiet kid to ladies man. Anyways I met this girl and we dated for a year, during the whole time I stopped talking to all the other girls cause I wanted to be loyal to her. But she treated me like $HIT during the whole relationship, ignoring my calls for days, never complimenting me, I would always buy her cards or presents on our monthly anniversaries she never got me anything, even for Christmas! Then I find out that she cheated on me sooo many times, to the point where she was involved in other relationships at the same time she was with me. I'm not gonna say this effected my self-esteem personally, but my human nature reaction tells me it has..I don't know what to do, I don't want to talk to any more girls, but its been almost 2 months since I haven't talked to her Ive just been focusing on myself, trying to improve my image, working out, getting to know myself, etc. Any advice on what I should do?
 
that depends on what you want. Are you looking to attract another ladyfriend?

That girl sounds like bad news. Nothing annoys me more than people who cheat in relationships. You're not thinking of getting back with her are you? for your own sake, dont do it!
 
No I would never get back with her. I just want to get my self-esteem back to normal about myself, not to attract a girlfriend or not, just for my own sake Thats it!
 
Just keep reminding yourself that not everyone is like her. Don't let your experience with her keep you from finding someone better.
 
You're the right track. You're doing the best that you can do for the moment.

There's been a level of trust that's been broken...While it is hard at first to saperate
her actions from others and your actions. Working on yourself esteem and loving yourself
will help you heal and think cleaer.

While at times you may feel guilt or shame about yourself...such as for being so stupid..etc.
Please do not beat up on yourself.

It is also okay to feel what you feel. If you feel like crying do so. Allow yourself to process your emotions.
If you feel angery..it's okay to feel your anger...process them...release your anger (don't hurt yourself or anyone in the porcess)
It's a process of LETTING GO.

Place no value judgments upon yourself or her.
If you feel you need to forgive...then do so...however forgiveness is not a requirement.
However you get to the piont of LETTING GO.
Acceptence can be a son of a *****..however acceptence will allow you to see clearer and heal.
Clearing yourself of the sickness that had contaminated you.

In loving yourself and be gental to yourself through this process...You're regaining yourself esteem or straightening it.
It is in this process the you learn to have compassion for yourself.

Try to saperate or identified yourself of the condition or circumstance.
You are completely whole and perfect already as a person...your actions is not who you are.
The relationship you tried to have with her was simply a mistake or a lesrning process.
Try to stay out of the blame game..Try not to blame yourself or her...
just simply know you both did the best that you could.
In other words ....don't cause any more pains for yourself or her.
You can't change her ...you can only change yourself.

While it can difficult to accept or process at first but once you get into the actions
and accepting you repsonsiblities at the core of your being, You're making decisions
for your own happiness. Happiness is an inside job. Self -esteem is an inside job.
You're nobody's doormate.
if you stay on this course you will mature as a person and learn how to form or
get into healty relationships and keep it healhty.
There's other women in the world...A healhty and loving woman will come into your life.
You will simply attract her to you..that's the law of attraction.

Just keep doing what you're doing.
Love yourself...love yourself through all of this.

Try to look at this experince as a charactor building process for yourself also.
Try to keep positive and there's good somehow out of all of this.

I know it's something you probably heard before...
( I hate that when people say that to me when I'm struggling...such as my ex-gf cheating on me)

If it didn't kill ya...it'll make you a better person.

Be WELL.
 
Yeh, don't blame yourself for her problems. If she has problems staying with 1 person, that only reflects on her (somewhat inconsiderate) personality and not yours. Just keep doin what you're doin and you'll be fine!
 

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