Anger getting the better of me

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PoisonFlowers

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I've always been a generally calm person who doesn't get riled up about stupid things, however it feels like my dad has chipped away at my tolerance until now I don't like what I see.

Every day, he just goes out of his way to piss me off. It didn't used to bother me because it's really stupid stuff like pinching me, hitting my arm, standing in my way, talking to me like an idiot (complete with condescending tone), calling me stupid, deliberately making me make way by acting all annoyed and then laughing saying "I'm only winding you up pahahaha." -_- Like I said, really stupid stuff. The thing is, he does it all the time and it's been like that for years. It's like having a very annoying younger brother.

Sometimes (like right now), it's like having anger coiled up in my chest, ready to snap at the slightest thing. I feel tense and it gives me a headache. It doesn't help that I'm generally not feeling to great at the moment either. The other day, I caught myself taking some of it out on my little brother (real one, not the dad lol) when he wasn't doing his work. I felt really bad afterwards, but it was as if it was just blowing out of me.

I zone out a lot at home too now, because I can't be bothered to respond to my dad's taunting. It's my brothers as well, but c'mon, he's my dad. Zoning out helps somewhat, but it doesn't get rid of the anger that seems to gradually build inside and I've started punching walls. It's ridiculous, I know! That's why it bothers me so much.

Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Do you know any tips for dealing with this anger which is completely out of proportion??
 
No matter how much you want to smash something, it is not a good idea. Afterwards you think awww, I like that, I wish it wasn't broken. Causes more problems that it fixes.

In my teens I have turned EVERYTHING upside down in my room, and I do have alot of stuff in my room! And then when your calm again, the fun begins. ....not really

I have thought about getting a punching bad, but the amount I feel like smashing something is very minimal and I can usually control it.

Iv only punched a door once, and broke my pinkie, I guess it was the bad punching technique.

It is not a good thing, just walk away calm down, try and express your feelings to your dad. If it gets wound up, just walk away, but he will probably give you honeysuckle for just walking away so say that you will come back when you both have cooled down.

As for zoning out, I do it at work, the guys give me a lot of honeysuckle, I just try to ignore it. I am usually in my own space and when they ask me something I am usually cut off and it takes a few attempts to get my attention. And then they wonder why it took so long to get a response lol.

Just slowly work on improving these problems, being a better person. And communicate your feelings, tell them how you feel. I think it would help alot. I think alot of people these days have issues which can be sorted out with some communication. Even if it is not a strong point communicating feelings (as I see as one of my major problems) you can only do your best, whats the worst they can do?

Hope all it going well, Samuel

((((((((((HUGZ)))))))))))
 
Thanks for the advice. Yeah, smashing stuff about doesn't solve anything, which is why I find it a vaguely silly urge to have.

Haha I think I must be having a belated teens in that case. They always say you grow out of it, but I seem to be growing into it :p

Iv only punched a door once, and broke my pinkie, I guess it was the bad punching technique.

Ouch! See, I definitely can't risk that because then I won't be able to play guitar. Punching pillows it is then lol.

I think most of my frustration is caused by the fact that my dad and older brother can be so immature. Not funny immature, but aggravatingly immature - they'll blow their tops over nothing and it gets taken out on me. Then my brother acts all high and mighty as if he knows best. That's why communication is a no go. It's not my strong point either, but I've learnt that there's no point with them.

Hopefully, when I get my own place things'll be okay. I guess this stuff comes with being the middle child as well as the only girl.

Great, free hugs :D (((((hugs back))))))
 
I have definitely improved from my teens. If I went back there now... I don't want to imagine...

Not getting worked up about something that isn't your problem. They are probably unconsciously coming to you to stir you up, so they can get their anger out :| and if you feed them, they will eat you. Don't get dragged into their cage, stay outside :)
 

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