Well i'm a guy who neither can gain nor loose weight, but even i somehow know what You're talking about.
From another post i made recently i would like to show You and edit a little:
Having low self-esteem is like a decease which need something out of the ordinary to be "cured". Having low self-esteem is like being a bit depressed even at the best of times, and getting friends when You're depressed is far from easy.
You have been around the fact that weight is important for too long; that the outside is more important than the inside. Someone or something has, perhaps indirectly, told You that You should not weigh this or that much for so long that it's deep within Your thoughts. Perhaps it's world media in general, or some people at school at some point in Your life. Things like these can come crushing down like thunder everytime You hear or see something about it once it get inside Your head.
The person that
i am right now, for example, didn't even exist three years ago. I were suicidally depressed and had been that for over five years. I also saw myself as rather useless sometimes, although because of something else than what You feel. You need to do something to make You understand that the thoughts You're having about people disliking You because of how much You weigh is only there because You think so. The more a person believes something him- or herself, the more that fact will show to the rest of the world.
It shows very well how a person feel about him- or herself. People do not dislike You for how much You weigh, but rather feel sorry for You because they can see how
You feel about Your weigh, rendering You shy and weak in their eyes.
Like so many people i've tried to help so far in this forum, i've told them that they need to try to change, quickly, to see that at least
pretending to like Yourself as You are will affect how other people see You as well. If You are conscent about Yourself, everyone around You will notice it and not think about Your weigh. If You are
happy about Yourself, people will think of You as a friendly, strong person for knowing that You just are as good to everyone else around You as You feel.
Once upon a time, i changed completely. I gave up who i were, my entire past and history and created a new, better Robin, which schocked everyone i knew, of course, but made them glad that i found a way to be happy again. The person that
You are right now, is a person that can be so full of life and self-esteem that You could stand on top of a bus and shout "I look much better than Yooouuuu!". But why aren't You? Howcome You feel so powerless about all this?
Because You aren't 100% Yourself. You are partly something else which isn't supposed to be there, something bad for You. To get this negative part of You out You must try to change Your ways about it, which at first could be to simply ignore it. Everyone can do this, but since everyone also is different, it all has to be put together in different phases and speed.
I really have to go now, i always get so caught up trying to help people when i see a new thread that i forget about time!
I would gladly talk to You in private to maybe get You to feel a little better. Send me a private message with Your e-mail and we could be pen-pals. Together we can do anything.