Why are women so picky?

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Expendable

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Is it me or do girls is todays society just seem to be unbeliveably picky? I'm sure in times gone by it was never this difficult to find a women who would be happy with you. I know I'm far from the best looking person in the world, I've quite an erratic personality and most of my interestests are pretty dull but the girls I tend to go for as lovely as they are, aren't anything particularly special. I'm fine with the intial stages of talking to girls and getting to know them but it seems the better they get to know me the less they like me. I can't see what I could do to make a girl like me.
 
It's not really just women dude, because in our society today almost everyone seems to be picky. It does really seem incredibly hard to find someone who loves you though and I can understand. No girl has ever felt the way I wanted them to feel about me so I can understand how to get the assumption to feel like they are picky as well. It's just more realistic to say that both sides are picky and the same. It's just about finding that one person who is right for you and someone who isn't picky.
 
Expendable said:
be happy with you.

im pretty sure women back then werent happy. it was just slightly better then completely horrible. like yay, youre better then nothing, so i choose you. yay for limited options.
 
depressing as it myt sound we living in todays era of plastic fresia ups...as in looks is and dictates everything very depressing but thats the way life goes....
 
Uhm... Men are picky, too. I think it's important to be picky. I mean, nobody wants to be with just anybody. We want somebody who meets as many of our needs and desires as possible.
 
h i said:
Expendable said:
be happy with you.

im pretty sure women back then werent happy. it was just slightly better then completely horrible. like yay, youre better then nothing, so i choose you. yay for limited options.

yay for being able to eat and survive :rolleyes: sure would have made me miserable.
 
I agree that it's important to be picky. For me, it's better to be alone than to be in a bad relationship. I'm pretty sure I'd feel way worse in a relationship I'm uncomfortable in.

Heck, if I don't think the girl is anything special, I don't see why I'd want my link with her to be anything special.

And women of the past weren't "picky" because often and in many places in the world, the pairings were pre-arranged. Hard to be picky! Not to mention, men held the jobs and the money, eh.
 
Expendable said:
I've quite an erratic personality and most of my interestests are pretty dull but the girls I tend to go for as lovely as they are, aren't anything particularly special.

If you can't find anything special about them, how do you expect them to find anything special about you?

There has to be something about them that is different from other girls you have met.
Otherwise, why the attraction? Unless you're simply attracted to their physical traits.
 
I'm picky and I'm a guy...the longer I live, the picker I ma getting.

What's your definition of erratic. As in an erratic genius???..Not the norm or above the norm
You think you're too good or too smart for women?..they're dull to you.

Or erratic... as in unstable, not consistant. Such ADD, bi polar, passive agressive, manic depressive?
Well..if you're erratic like this...maybe 5 mins from now..you'll think chicks are awesume. :p

So when you talk to a woman..you treat her as if she's not particularly special??
Well Duh.....dude
if you wanna get into a woman...you have to at least get into her becuase it's not all about you.
Come on now...you gatta at least remember her birthday, the first time you kissed her. Her favorite song
Her faviote ice cream, Her favorite colure. Her favorite poam. Her favorite book. Her favorite hobbies
Her hopes and dreams. her favorite movie or movies. Her favorite flower. These are just minimal stuff.

So when you say you're erratic...when women talk...you space out?:p
That's just a guy thing.....man. it's not ADD.lmao

Maybe you're putting out a vibe of...when after you get what you want from a woman..then she's nothing in particular special.
Maybe they lose interest in you becuase you're not interested in them?

There has to be something you epecificly like about a particular woman...The way she walks, her scent, the way she carries herself.
her vioce, the colour of her eyes, her view on life, her gentleness, her sweetness, her sexiness, her self repect.

There's a especific woman that makes my blood boil and makes my heart wanna explode. It's everything about her.
Maybe she likes that or that's what draws her to me....
 
Both men and women ARE picky....but fortunately everyone is picky about different things, so no one is ever truly out of the game.

----Steve
 
Expendable said:
... I'm sure in times gone by it was never this difficult to find a women who would be happy with you....

I am not sure that i could agree with that. It seems a bit like 'Every horse thinks his pack is the heaviest'. Maybe there is some difference, i really couldn't say, but i don't see it. Due to changes in technology, this is the time with the greatest ease of communication, which is an advantage that didn't exist in "times gone by". In general there is greater mobility. It would seem to be an advantage also.

As far as the deteriorating quality of people, that seems to be something that has been written about for as long as there is written record. That leads me to think that it is largely just perception.

As i mentioned, i really couldn't say. I just don't see it.
 
I think Minus is onto something here.

Perhaps it seemed "easier" in the past because people would tend to settle more. They still had their preferences...but because thirty miles was a two-day trip, people had no sense of a greater world out there. That would tend to make people look for the "best fit," person who was close to home.

These days, however, we have an ingrained sense that if no one around us meets our criteria, we can always communicate with someone on the other side of the world...and they're only a click away.

So it's not really that people are more picky, it's that they can actually act on their pickiness because of the Great and Glorious World Wide Web....and other mass comms.

----Steve
 
also conservative social pressure and expected norms..

you find someone.. you settle down.. you have kids.. get on with it.

what? you want to be independent and explore the world and yourself! nutcase! into the padded room with you!!!

with more communication now it is easier to find out about all different types of lifestyles.. not just from the immediate people around you.. through the net you can find out how other people think and live which otherwise you may have never met .. you get to see the huge variety and know you don't have to follow the 'straight and narrow' ..

but if you want that .. go for it.
 
Past:

Mom & Father to daughter: You're marrying him. End story.

Now:

*girl sees boy and decides for herself* :p
 
SophiaGrace said:
Past:

Mom & Father to daughter: You're marrying him. End story.

Wow you are going into the past, at least as far as your country is concerned. Yup after an arraigned marriage with no choice at all, any choice is being more 'picky'.
 
SophiaGrace said:
Past:

Mom & Father to daughter: You're marrying him. End story.

Now:

*girl sees boy and decides for herself* :p

This made me chuckle :p


I think I am pretty picky when it comes to partners. I have odd preferences (which I'll explain about in a sec) and will certainly check them out to make sure that I am ok with that person. I know that sounds really big-headed, because I do have flaws too. I'm not saying I pick out faults or anything. I just have a weird freak-out over hands and feet. More so hands though. It is very strange, I know. But if I don't like the look of somebodys hands then how could I even let them near me? Never mind touch me! I don't understand the bizarre logic of this myself, yet it is a BIG part of what I look for in a guy (or at least one of the things I check out first) I think it might be because of hands in the past I've seen, perhaps...It is very odd.

But in terms of a guy generally, I'm not picky about anything else really. Yes there are a few things that would be super all in one package - but I generally go for the person individually (aslong as they pass the hand/feet test first haha)

So I guess what I'm saying is I am admittingly sort-of picky. And I just wanted to apologise for it really. :club:
 
Expendable said:
Is it me or do girls is todays society just seem to be unbeliveably picky?

People, make up your minds already, either we're not picky enough because we only date ******** in favor of the nice guys or we're "too picky?"

Please. /rant


Newsflash: We should all be "picky" in that we should take care to choose people with whom we have something in common so that we can stand to be around one another once the first flush of superficial attraction fades. Then you're left with the core person. You'd stand a better chance of staying together if you at least share the core values/philosophy and have something that you can do together other than screw.

We're in a more self-indulgent time now; gone are the days where we would not divorce for fear of causing dishonor to the family or angering God by breaking His covenant. No. Now if we decide that our happiness is at stake, we're apt to haul stakes and blow town for greener pastures rather than work through things and possibly find a deeper relationship.


Admittedly, I am bitter. At this point I never ever want to get married again, so I may be "picky in the extreme."

I may get over it in time.
 
cheaptrickfan said:
Expendable said:
Is it me or do girls is todays society just seem to be unbeliveably picky?

People, make up your minds already, either we're not picky enough because we only date ******** in favor of the nice guys or we're "too picky?"

Please. /rant

Don't forget "too fickle". I wonder when a thread claiming this will eventually pop up? Or have I missed it already?
 
oarivan said:
cheaptrickfan said:
People, make up your minds already, either we're not picky enough because we only date ******** in favor of the nice guys or we're "too picky?"

Please. /rant

Don't forget "too fickle". I wonder when a thread claiming this will eventually pop up? Or have I missed it already?


Oooo, that's a good one too. I can't recall a thread with that as women's main failing.

Usually we're just shallow in that we only fall for asshats and would rather date the juiced-up muscle heads (or pretty boys... See? We're so bad that we can't even decide).
 
cheaptrickfan said:
Usually we're just shallow in that we only fall for asshats and would rather date the juiced-up muscle heads (or pretty boys... See? We're so bad that we can't even decide).

Haha and guys are shallow because they tend to gravitate towards the uber-boobs and dumb easy girls. :p

----Steve
 

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