Questions.What if...

I apologize if my english is not that good. But I'm sure you'll understand what I'm typing.

1. You just found out that your partner is cheating on you, like, having sex with others. You got angry but then realized that you have a son and your son will soon ask who's his real mom. Your partner is apologizing over and over again because he/she still looooooves you to death. But because of pride, you wouldn't talk to him/her. What are you going to plan to do with your partner?


2. You and your partner broke up because he/she found out that you're cheating on him/her. You know you didn't mean to *cheat* because you're drunk at that time. And she/he won't believe you. She/He won't even talk to you. You know you still love your partner. And you both have a 8monthsold son. You miss them so much. What are you planning to do with them if the situation is this bad?


3. You found out that your ex-partner is already dating someone new. Of course, you got jealous. (Who wouldn't?) Your friends are telling you that your ex-partner's new partner is much more attractive than you. What would you feel? And what are you going to do to have your partner back?


4. You don't have many friends, your parents are not with you, and you don't attend school. Do you have any other idea how to get your self busy?


5. Let's say you're 14 and you smoke cigarette, and drink (beer, wine, tequilla, vodka and any other liquior) because you think that it would help a little to forget your depression somehow. Is it really helping you?


6. You think you have mental disorders because you noticed that daydreaming is your new hobby, you laugh alone when you think about memories that are really funny, you cry alone when you think about your problems, you have suicidal thoughts (like, i'd-better-be-dead-so-that-i-won't-have-to-feel-this-pain-anymore), you don't want to sleep because you might dream about your ex-partner and her/his new partner AGAIN, you hate listening to music because you would just hear the songs that your ex-partner is singing, you hate to look at your cellphone because you've been waiting for his text message but then again, he/she won't talk or even text you. What are you going to do?

a. Get a rope, a hammer, and some nails?
b. Cut your self?
c. Beer. Beer. Beer?
d. Smoke. Smoke. Smoke?
e. 100 sleeping pills before going to sleep?
f. All of the above?
or
g. None of the above?

and Why?


7. You think that Suicide is the only answer. But you're afraid to do so because you're a Christian. You fear that God will not let you live in paradise. What is the lake of fire? Is it real? What about reincarnation? Spirits. Are they real? What if you just live and die-- no after life, heaven or hell? You believe the Holy Book, you pray every night. But you sometimes ask: God, are you real?


8. You don't have enough money to enroll for the next school year. Any suggestions that a 14-year-old can do to have money?


9. You're reading this post. Do you think I'm insane?


and lastly,


10. Can you please reply at this post? Because I really want some answers.




Again, I apologize for my english
Thanks for reading guys. I would appreciate it more if you would answer some of my questions

1) If your partner loved you he wouldnt be sleeping around. If he loved his son he wouldnt be sleeping around. If he cared about the emotional stability of his family, he would not be doing this. But he is, which signals the very opposite of what a loving person should be doing. You are not prideful to not speak to him.

2) This is a tougher one because of the alcohol involved...but what was the person doing in a situation that could escalate with alcohol in their system?

3) Who cares if they are more attractive? Beauty fades... and it doesnt determine your self worth who they date.

4) try Meetup.com

5) No. All substances used to avoid reality inhibit one from facing reality are bad....chemical substances which alter reality. And you definately shouldnt be taking them at 14! Instead, go get counseling.

6) G. Go get counseling and possibly think about anti-depressants, dont use substances to try and numb the pain.

7) Hm sounds like youre afraid of eternal retribution if suicide is carried out & you also doubt God is real. Not sure what to say on this one.

8) newspaper boy? Raking leaves? shoveling snow? pulling weeds for a neighbor?

9) No, I think you have stuff to work through

10) I did!

SophiaGrace said:

8) newspaper boy? Raking leaves? shoveling snow? pulling weeds for a neighbor?

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I just hope I live in America! =)

Geeze..the what if

1. The day came when I did found out my partner cheated on....
will...I was very up set. i didn't really know how to process it..becuase I was in fucken shock.
I didn't say anything becuase all that would do was make it worst...but honeysuckle that didn't fucken help...
becuase if you ever had been cheated on before...the cheater starts accusing you of cheating...there's no what if about that.

2, how in the fresia do you mean you didn't mean to cheat ?

3, fresia her best friend or sister. Revenge is best when you're on top.

4, yes, that's what a gibson les paul and girls are made far....

5, Will i did get stoned when I was 14...at the time I thought it help...FFS

6, beer..beer..beer..to kill more fucken brain cells because I have a mental disorder..I would do honeysuckle like that, not thinking straight..Errr

7, I did killed myself..I was brought back to life...maybe there is a god or I'm a fucken vampire.
Or i'm actaully in hell already. Some people just like to call it planet earth.

8, get a fucken job ..


9, No..I think you're young and trying to find answers....lighten up. Be a kid.



10,

whoa. some heavy issues for a 14 year old.

ThisGuy said:

whoa. some heavy issues for a 14 year old.

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Yeah. Too hard for me though. I already have a baby, my parents are already divorced, I'm living with my aunt with her 5 kids, and sometimes, I'll call my friends if ever they have space left, I'll ask them if I can sleep at their house. I'm a Christian, but then again, I doubt God sometimes. I can say that beer helps because it helps me get numb. Cigarette also helps because I could get my self busy puffing and not thinking about anything. Tsk tsk. I've been thinking about suicide. Well, just like LoneSomeCrow, I already "did" it. But I was brought back to life again (the vampire thingy made me laugh). I took 41 pieces of expired aspirins and the next thing I remember, is that I woke up at 3am and then I started vomitting and I can't stop, and then, I felt something like... I'm falling and falling and falling and falling... And then-- I'm awake. And I'm at the hospital bed. Whew! I'm just a kid, and life is a nightmare. :|

MegaMelt said:

ThisGuy said:

whoa. some heavy issues for a 14 year old.

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Yeah. Too hard for me though. I already have a baby, my parents are already divorced, I'm living with my aunt with her 5 kids, and sometimes, I'll call my friends if ever they have space left, I'll ask them if I can sleep at their house. I'm a Christian, but then again, I doubt God sometimes. I can say that beer helps because it helps me get numb. Cigarette also helps because I could get my self busy puffing and not thinking about anything. Tsk tsk. I've been thinking about suicide. Well, just like LoneSomeCrow, I already "did" it. But I was brought back to life again (the vampire thingy made me laugh). I took 41 pieces of expired aspirins and the next thing I remember, is that I woke up at 3am and then I started vomitting and I can't stop, and then, I felt something like... I'm falling and falling and falling and falling... And then-- I'm awake. And I'm at the hospital bed. Whew! I'm just a kid, and life is a nightmare. :|

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You know, you do have your child to think about. So, dont hurt yourself. He/She needs their mommy!

1. You just found out that your partner is cheating on you, like, having sex with others. You got angry but then realized that you have a son and your son will soon ask who's his real mom. Your partner is apologizing over and over again because he/she still looooooves you to death. But because of pride, you wouldn't talk to him/her. What are you going to plan to do with your partner?

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It can be hard when you have a child together and the relationship doesn't work out because you feel obliged to stick together for the childs sake. But does the child really benefit from this? If you stayed with this person would you truly forgive them? Would you be happy? Would you trust them? Or would it be awkward perhaps? With a lack of trust? And constant arguments?

Staying together for the sake of a child can have serious consequences, which might even make it worse for the child in the long term.

You have to work out whether you WANT to be with this person - and if you can REALLY trust them again. A partner being unfaithful is a hard thing to get over. Make sure you are honest to yourself.

2. You and your partner broke up because he/she found out that you're cheating on him/her. You know you didn't mean to *cheat* because you're drunk at that time. And she/he won't believe you. She/He won't even talk to you. You know you still love your partner. And you both have a 8monthsold son. You miss them so much. What are you planning to do with them if the situation is this bad?

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Being unfaithful is an extremely selfish act and you have to admit that really. Blaming it on 'being drunk' is not an excuse. You need to admit you are wrong to your partner and try earn back trust. It is all on THEIR terms though. If they don't want to see you, then you must back off. You are the one who has hurt them, you are the one in the wrong.

As for the child, make sure the partner knows that you are going to be involved whether they like it or not, and that you will be sticking around because you are committed to helping fetch up this child.

3. You found out that your ex-partner is already dating someone new. Of course, you got jealous. (Who wouldn't?) Your friends are telling you that your ex-partner's new partner is much more attractive than you. What would you feel? And what are you going to do to have your partner back?

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If this is the same scenario from the above, and you have cheated - they have broken up with you and found someone new - then I'm sorry but there isn't much you can really do. You were the one who cheated in the first place so you have to let it go. Be there for the child and be there as a friend to your ex. But they have moved on, accept it and let it go.

4. You don't have many friends, your parents are not with you, and you don't attend school. Do you have any other idea how to get your self busy?

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Why not try getting a few hobbies? Or try out volunteering at some place? Volunteering is a great way to meet new people, get some routine in your life and also helps build up your CV/resume with lots of things.

Why are you not attending school?

5. Let's say you're 14 and you smoke cigarette, and drink (beer, wine, tequilla, vodka and any other liquior) because you think that it would help a little to forget your depression somehow. Is it really helping you?

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I can speak from experience, it definitely does NOT help you. When you sober up your problems and depression will still be there - maybe even greater because hangovers suck.
Why don't you start working on your problems instead of drinking them away?

6. You think you have mental disorders because you noticed that daydreaming is your new hobby, you laugh alone when you think about memories that are really funny, you cry alone when you think about your problems, you have suicidal thoughts (like, i'd-better-be-dead-so-that-i-won't-have-to-feel-this-pain-anymore), you don't want to sleep because you might dream about your ex-partner and her/his new partner AGAIN, you hate listening to music because you would just hear the songs that your ex-partner is singing, you hate to look at your cellphone because you've been waiting for his text message but then again, he/she won't talk or even text you. What are you going to do?

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g. None of the above?

Go speak to a doctor. Keep busy - go out with whatever friends/family you do have. Start volunteering someone. Get some hobbies. Read. Write. Listen to music that your ex-partner has never heard of or doesn't listen to (so then it won't remind you of them)

Hurting oneself isn't a solution. It just causes more grief in the long term.

7. You think that Suicide is the only answer. But you're afraid to do so because you're a Christian. You fear that God will not let you live in paradise. What is the lake of fire? Is it real? What about reincarnation? Spirits. Are they real? What if you just live and die-- no after life, heaven or hell? You believe the Holy Book, you pray every night. But you sometimes ask: God, are you real?

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Talk to a doctor.

8. You don't have enough money to enroll for the next school year. Any suggestions that a 14-year-old can do to have money?

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Where do you live? Check out if the government or local council give funding or scholarships for people with hardly any money? Or you could start working somewhere quickly?

9. You're reading this post. Do you think I'm insane?

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No. I think you need professional help though. Seek out a doctor to talk to.

10. Can you please reply at this post? Because I really want some answers.

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Hope this helps. x

1. I would be heart broken. I wouldn't talk to my partner because I would be shocked and hurt, not because of pride. I could no longer trust my boyfriend if he cheated on me. Trust, communication, and honesty is essential in relationships.

2. If my partner chose to put themselves in a situation where alcohol is involved, then they set themselves up for the consequences. Especially if he drank around people he didn't know, or people that were flirting with him. Therefore, alcohol wouldn't be an excuse.

3. If I was the one that cheated on my boyfriend, I wouldn't expect my boyfriend to take me back. I also wouldn't do anything to break them up. I would be more worried about his new girlfriend being around my child, and how she would treat my child.


4. I actually don't have my parents and I don't have a lot of friends. If I didn't go to school, then I would be searching avidly for a job or odd jobs I could do for others to get money.

5. The more you put depression on the backburner, the stronger it comes back. Substance abuse is no way to deal with depression. Besides, you have a child that you are responsible for. You are the role-model for that baby.


6. I'd go to a doctor to get professional help.

g. None of the above?

and Why? It's not healthy.


7. If God talked back, I'd be scared shitless. Then I'd really need to see a doctor.


8. Get a job or do odd jobs.

9. No, but I do think you need help.

10. I did.

MegaMelt said:

cheating

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At such a young age neither partner knows what they want and is really just exploring life. They don't realize it's natural for things to end and that it takes people with real character to avoid drama and forge a good relationship that will last.

Cheating says a lot of things: it conveys lack of trust, complete disregard for how you have hurt the one you supposedly care about, and a lack of communication. It would be better to flat out tell someone you want an open relationship. To attain forgiveness the cheater needs to prove beyond the shadow of a doubt they have mastered these issues. It will take time, but it is the only way to ensure it does not happen again and frankly they should be glad they are getting a second chance at all.

5. Let's say you're 14 and you smoke cigarette, and drink (beer, wine, tequilla, vodka and any other liquior) because you think that it would help a little to forget your depression somehow. Is it really helping you?

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As a means to drown your sorrows? no, but I bet it makes you feel more adult. I was depressed with a relationship and drinking one night, much to my surprise I had a good night alone and actually got into watching a movie. A bad relationship sucks the fun out of everything, so use the drinking to have a good night instead, and don't keep doing it. Yes it's cool to do the forbidden, but drinking is really not good for you at that age and will probably stunt your growth. Don't smoke either. You have a kid and money is going to be tight. You can't afford to get caught up with addictions.

6. You think you have mental disorders because you noticed that daydreaming is your new hobby, you laugh alone when you think about memories that are really funny, you cry alone when you think about your problems, you have suicidal thoughts

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Nothing wrong with daydreaming or escaping into fantasy. Just don't let it control you or be prepared to surrender your entire life to it, which might you an excellent story writer someday, but prolly won't amount to anything.

The fun has been sucked out of everything. This won't last forever though. Just take it one day at a time. Suicide is no answer, because if reincarnation happens you just be born into the same situation again until you learn how to live with it. Suicide is running away, and running away from your problems never helps. Don't take that gamble, stick it out. It won't be any better the next 900 times.

7. You think that Suicide is the only answer. But you're afraid to do so because you're a Christian. You fear that God will not let you live in paradise. What is the lake of fire? Is it real? What about reincarnation? Spirits. Are they real? What if you just live and die-- no after life, heaven or hell? You believe the Holy Book, you pray every night. But you sometimes ask: God, are you real?

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All humans have two sides, a rational mind that doubts and a side that wants to believe. You don't have to decide what's real, there are wonderful people in all religions and walks of life. I refuse to believe any of them are damned for making the wrong choice in religion, one of life's little gambles. No matter how much you believe or disbelieve you are denying the other side of yourself so it's pointless. Doubt and Explore, it's all you can really do and ultimately all that will be expected of you.

I would say that God is all existence as one, and also all nonexistence at the same time. After a lifetime of study, my attitude is that everyone is right. God exists, God doesn't exist. Both are right. People spend their whole lives thinking about this kind of stuff, so don't expect any quick answers.

Reincarnation: I have to say it's appearing everywhere, including the mathematical oracles (astrology, numerology, etc) theres even articles saying it's in the Bible. (look for teachings of Origen) The idea is that each lifetime is to teach you lessons, and if you were say an evil dictator in one life your next might require to die at the hands of one. It's God's way of keeping perfect justice without ever interfering with human affairs. Plus the people who are aware of their past lives, and little infants who speak of dire circumstances (likely a tramatic cause of death in their last life) that at that age they just couldn't know or imagine.

If we just die: don't believe this, it will cause you to cheat others to make the most of your little life. Most people don't know they have a spirit, until they do astral projection. There are many different afterlife outcomes, including becoming a ghost and haunting up the place. Energy is neither created nor destroyed. It is eternal. Consciousness = energy, so I'd say its safe to assume there has to be something after this world. There are 11 major dimensions and science can't explain the lack of matter in the universe. The so called dark matter or dark energy is more likely evidence of the higher planes. "The place between stars you call space is actually a vibrant void full of countless spirit worlds." -from the Qabalah.

8. You don't have enough money to enroll for the next school year. Any suggestions that a 14-year-old can do to have money?

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Single 14 year old mother with kid? See if the government will help.

9. You're reading this post. Do you think I'm insane?

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No. I think you're either learning some very harsh life lessons or judging by some of your multiple choice options are just messing around and looking for attention. If you are serious, keep this in mind. At 14 there is tons of stuff to learn, you can completely reinvent yourself, and when you do the old you and all the issues along with will be long gone in the past.

Wow. The replies helped! Thanks a lot guys! =) I am somehow, relieved.